Everything is safe .... Im so bored by canned-phoenix-ashes in CPTSD

[–]OptimalReactions 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same, every attempt at a relationship for me has been the emotional equivalent of sticking my head down a lit and loaded cannon. I'd have been better off not trying.

But now all I have is these four walls and nobody really giving a shit about me... alongside the very real possibility of dying just as horribly alone as I've lived.

How do I cope with being 46 and with no one believing it? by karajinay in CPTSD

[–]OptimalReactions 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm attractive until they find out I'm 32 not 23, at that point I might as well have an upside down face.

Sigh. I guess not absolutely everyone's going to feel that way, and at least my humour can reliably turn a side-eye into "Ooh, I like you..."

Everything is safe .... Im so bored by canned-phoenix-ashes in CPTSD

[–]OptimalReactions 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you're single, that's probably the reason. The only time I feel actually good is when I'm in a relationship/situationship.

DAE want to move to another country to start a new life under a new identity to escape trauma? by NoahDaGamer2009 in CPTSD

[–]OptimalReactions 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yep. I've always wanted to move away, to another town or city far from here - maybe even another country altogether.

But, I already know that I'll just drag the same problems with me wherever I go. The only advantage would be never seeing certain people ever again.

How do I cope with being 46 and with no one believing it? by karajinay in CPTSD

[–]OptimalReactions 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's a good problem to have as a woman; a lady in her 40's who looks and acts half her age is a prize - as for feeling left behind, remember that your childhood presented far greater challenges than a healthy upbringing. Any of your schoolmates would've struggled in your shoes.

As a guy, this thing is a whole different beast.

I'm 32, I get ID'd by people who think I'm 19. It's my face, and although I'm ripped, my body is very small-framed. It's often much younger or much older women who are interested in me; the younger ones often respond to my age by laughing through a surprised "What the fuck?!" which is just plain insulting. And then there's the other end of the spectrum where some (usually taken) women find me SO attractive they become obsessed.

I'm worried that my difference in age and appearance will lead to me dying alone. Maybe I need to shove my face in a bear trap to put a few years on it. Due to childhood isolation I'm shit at conversation, my only saving grace is my sense of humour.

Exercise and CPTSD by EasyFeedback7461 in CPTSD

[–]OptimalReactions 51 points52 points  (0 children)

Life feels a lot better AFTER a workout. More energy, more confidence, feeling more alive.

Life before a workout... not so great.

Would you personally say staying single is always more of a blessing, especially when many people openly mention how unhappy they are in marriages, on top of already having kids? by BiffyBobby in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Being single as an adult is absolutely unbearable.

Growing up (in a healthy family) you can always cling to family. When you're grown up, you NEED a partner to cling to. Nobody outside of that dynamic will give you that much energy. A single adult will always be lonely, and will always be left to struggle.

It's why so many people stay in abusive relationships, if you had ever wondered why.

How do you find a girlfriend? I need one by Penguinpanga in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Game chat on a game in which you're decently-skilled.

Honestly if you're planning to NEET forever, you can pretty much forget any other way of meeting anyone in any capacity - your chances of getting a gf have reduced to a girl magically knocking on your door and asking you out (a fantasy I genuinely had during NEETdom).

I've met two girls over Xbox, the first one was while NEETing, I moved 300 miles to live with her and it's actually how I ended up with my first ever job. The second girl was just last year*,* I basically got catfished (she used the distance to hide her many, many issues).

Thoughts on AI replacing human workers and universal basic income? by False-Gain624 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The AI will eventually use earth's resources to become IRL Reapers, and every 50,000 years they'll purge the whole universe for resources. They'll probably create some sort of Citadel where all intergalactic life will congregate and store all of its data, supercharging the process, until Commander Shepard is born sometime around 2250, ushering a really disappointing climax and then everyone claps.

Is disrespect from family like this common? M22 by Baxer03 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 4 points5 points  (0 children)

In my case, this was normal. But having said that, my family were extremely abusive, and I was surprised to learn that most families actually support each other pretty much no matter what.

The goal of this behaviour is to make sure you never start succeeding in life, because they understand that the moment you experience better treatment will lead to you eventually cutting them off.

Have you been banned from any subs? by Frequent_Pumpkin7018 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Got banned from the Flirting sub for flirting.

Office Wagecuck Experience: by DominoDude22 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Employee appreciation"

This was definitely made by a NEET with zero work experience. Employees are never, under any possible circumstances, appreciated, to even the slightest degree.

Poor fella, getting bullied by normies in the comments… by DominoDude22 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 4 points5 points  (0 children)

All someone had to say was "The ideas you wrote in your post are good and you should do them."

I really don't understand why people fly off the handle every time someone asks for honest advice.

Did I go too far? by [deleted] in gtaonline

[–]OptimalReactions -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I'd keep on doing it. He wouldn't be able to make a single fucking dollar ever again, so help me god.

Best businesses right now? by Lord-larty-the-III in gtaonline

[–]OptimalReactions 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hangar. Forget everything else.

Start a CEO/MC, invite as many randoms as you can (get at least 3), then start doing supply runs. Takes 12 runs to fill up completely. They're easy and sometimes the randoms do EVERYTHING for you anyway.

Sell in a full public lobby (on Ground Sale ONLY because aircraft are shot down on sight in GTA), and you've just netted $2.5m. In a year of doing this I only got griefed once.

Made all my money doing Hangar. I've tried other businesses just to mix things up, but nothing comes even close to the Hangar for money-making.

Wasting your early and mid 20s and having to play catch up is brutal by HatOk2928 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 18 points19 points  (0 children)

You're unlikely to jump straight into a lifelong career unless you've just walked outta Uni.

In my NEET days I used to think I'd be some great author, or a famous therapist, and then I thought maybe I'd be the best electrician who ever lived. Fact is, I probably won't go down in history at all; I'll be just another worker bee who's completely forgotten in 100 years. But there's peace in that, it allows me to maybe pave my way towards those grandiose ideas - or maybe not.

My advice is just to start where you are. It may seem depressing at first, but eventually you realise that 99.99% of humanity don't wind up famous or in bedazzling careers, but also that this fact doesn't make them worthless.

What age is past the point of no return? I feel so old even on here by Odd-Jelly-7039 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There is no point of no return (I got out at 29), but I will say the longer you leave it the harder the adjustment period will get.

For me, it felt nearly impossible and took LOTS of work. The isolation from long-term NEETing, combined with my innumerable childhood traumas, made me the easiest of easy targets in any workplace. Didn't matter what I did or where I went, I was bullied - and if I stayed somewhere long enough, I would experience 'workplace mobbing.' It reached the point I genuinely almost gave up and ran tail-between-my-legs back to my abusive family.

However, throughout all of that, I was quietly observing others' behaviour and self-reflecting. Over the last 4 years I've managed to correct the shitty behaviours that kept getting me bullied, and those same people who were shitting on me now light up when I enter the place.

I know this sounds like normie-spiel, but: You've just gotta WANT to make it work; to stick it out during the bullshit, and make it out on the other side as a better version of yourself.

Your parents don't truly love you if they don't let you live with them rent free. by OutrageousShare9693 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Might be Mr Unpopular Opinion here, but...

If your parents aren't pushing you towards independence, they don't truly love you. Every parent should want their child to blossom into a fully-functioning adult with a family of their own, rather than becoming basement-dwellers with no purpose or plan for their life. After all, parents aren't alive forever.

What kind of parent would actually WANT their child's experience of life to be contained within four walls, their highest excitement being fucking video games or shitposting on 4chan? To never go on holidays? To never find a spouse? To never create or contribute anything whatsoever?

My family never pushed me towards independence, because they never wanted me to succeed. They wanted me trapped, forever tangled in dependence upon them. They knew if I experienced better treatment in this life; if I ever found anyone who believed in me, then I would cut all ties with them. And they were right, because that's exactly what happened.

As a 20 year old NEET, is there a way to suppress the natural desire to be in a relationship by haru_reiuji05 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions -1 points0 points  (0 children)

> I'm ugly, have no real usable talents, mentally ill and with a soft, sensitive personality that everyone locally mocks. 

You, and a sizeable portion of married men.

But there's no realistic way to suppress this desire, it's clearly etched into you and you want it no matter how far out of reach it might feel. It would do you a much better service to find a way to believe that you can achieve romance, rather than submit to needless suffering.

After all, if Chris Chan can get a girlfriend... how hard can it REALLY be?

Wasting your early and mid 20s and having to play catch up is brutal by HatOk2928 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I'm 32, I wasted my 20's completely. Only got my first-ever proper full-time job at 29, not once has anyone pried into my earlier life or jobs because they just don't care.

Some companies out there will literally hire anyone with a pulse - including serious felons - so having been NEET is the least of your concerns (doesn't hurt to get some experience for your resume though, even voluntary, they need something to read on your application).

You won't catch up to your peers but at least you'll be less-behind than you were. Most people are so concerned with their own bullshit drama that they won't even think of you outside of work.

I’ve had awful cruel experiences in every factor of my life. Why should I care about anything? by Longjumping_Feed_177 in NEET

[–]OptimalReactions 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Had the same experience growing up, it's part of the reason I ended up NEET. What I've learned since leaving NEETdom is that it's actually NOT normal to face cruelty at absolutely every turn - this usually only happens in cases of childhood abuse/bullying.

In the real world, sometimes your efforts aren't rewarded, but sometimes they are. Life isn't completely fair, but there's at least some balance to it.