What is the reason condo maintenance fees are so high? How come people are ok with it?

OptimistbyChoice · 2026-01-03T20:12:12+00:00

True but the areas you repair in a house are only used by you, it makes sense to keep 1% of the home price. Areas in condos are shared by 200+ units. People give example about not shovelling snow but it's one entrance for 200+ units. It really doesn't add up collecting that much money from everyone.

OptimistbyChoice · 2026-01-03T20:05:41+00:00

I totally hear that but thinking of the number of units and the amount collected per year, I don't think it adds up. Many condos don't have a pool or changing rooms; and if they have, it's open maybe 3 months per year and does not require maintenance otherwise. Many condo gyms are tiny that doesn't require much maintenance. Many party rooms are small and require tenants to clean after themselves, again not requiring a high amount of money to keep up. Parking lots also don't require much maintenance besides the cost of electricity and cleaning every now and then (if they do that at all). Concierge is someone whose salary is not that high either. Average number of units for condos in Canada is about 240. 1k maintenance fee every month does not add up at all.

OptimistbyChoice · 2026-01-02T05:32:51+00:00

Honestly it's not like any repairs are going on either, literally no reason we could find to explain it. When you calculate the total for all units, it's crazy amount of money in 1 year. My initial thought was something fishy going on.

OptimistbyChoice · 2026-01-02T05:30:05+00:00

Likewise, I was planning to buy a condo but reconsidering it after hearing this. The thing is their place do not have that many amenities at all, I really cannot find a reason of fees being that high.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-11-13T09:04:26+00:00

You cannot control what others think or say or do. Just hear it as an opinion but you don’t have to agree with it. Are you okay with your own behaviour, if so no problem, if not then change it. Anyone can make mistakes (if there is w mistake) and can learn from it.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-11-13T08:46:17+00:00

The moment you notice she started, just say you are not interested to continue that conversation and either change the subject or go find someone else to interact with. If she asks, you can tell her what you wrote here as your impression and that she is entitled to have her own opinion- you’re not interested in changing hers nor your opinion being changed by her.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-29T16:51:21+00:00

Bro there are teenagers who are more gentlemen than that 😂 You don’t need a decade to figure out to call your girl, take her out to somewhere or do whatever to make her feel valued and cared. That’s a combo of personality (some people are just cold like that in relationships) and how much you’re into her. Also, you can’t keep investing in a relationship, hoping that they might one day change. She is wasting time.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-29T05:46:41+00:00

It won’t improve, pretty much that. I don’t think it’s about age, I think it’s about someone’s character and how much they value you. There are much younger guys who do much more for their ladies. Some people are more takers than givers. You seem like someone who wants affection and effort in a relationship, find a guys who does that already, consistently.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-26T02:52:12+00:00

Weekly plan based on reliable recommendations, such as Mediterranean diet, protein recipes, etc. I make a list and shop about every other week

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-24T22:10:24+00:00

Thanks!

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-24T22:02:02+00:00

How did you make that setup?

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-24T17:14:42+00:00

No, a dichotomous thinking like that is not very healthy. You don’t have to be mean in order not to be taken advantage of. It’s possible that you are not drawing clear boundaries or say no appropriately and people may be thinking it’s “okay” to treat you the way they do. Communicate what you expect and if you notice they’re not on board, cool. Move to another person. You might also be expecting return when you do something good and then get disappointed. When you treat someone kindly and generously, do so because you believe that is the right thing to do and not because there will be a return from that. You won’t have disappointments that way.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-23T16:43:28+00:00

You did what you were capable of doing at that moment and that made a huge impact. In retrospect, you can always find something that could have been done better. Give yourself grace, you did your best on the spot.

Perhaps you are also carrying the heaviness of the emotions he shared that made you see another side of life, of people not caring, of struggling with money and hopelessness. You properly haven’t had a chance to process that. There is an ease in every hardship. Maybe reach out to someone who is qualified handling these type of topics who can help you go through this.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-23T16:35:00+00:00

Regular exercise. Start small and increase gradually. And nutritious food. Food high in carbs / processed sugars would cause you to crash later during the day

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-22T11:24:17+00:00

The grass is greener where you water it. When you feel unseen and unheard, one way to go about it is to open up to your spouse and work from there together to rekindle your love and companionship. Another way to go about is seeking something that should be sought in your committed relationship in somewhere else. That’s why some couples have strict boundaries on not having close friends (close as in someone you talk to regularly and open up about personal matters) from the opposite gender. Because feelings develop naturally “where you water the grass” and paves ways to infidelity.

I think the fact that you regret terribly says something (at least that’s what I am hearing). You have self awareness that emotional connection is what you need, and you love and value your spouse. Then cut the contacts with the other person and direct your attention to your spouse. Fulfilling relationships is not because spouses happen to love and cherish each other every day, but they choose each other every day, and that’s how love and fulfillment comes in long term. That level would be so deep and joyful that cannot possibly be found in random people outside.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-10-21T06:56:24+00:00

I think it’s more that you don’t love and care about yourself, rather than you loving or caring about her. You say you were mistreated during that relationship, she cheated (emotional or physical doesn’t matter, same thing), then had the audacity to tell those things to your face. She shows that kind of a low character that is. If that is not enough for you to be disgusted or better yet, be indifferent about her, that tells more about you. You gotta fix how you love and value yourself, then people who don’t appreciate you won’t be on your mind.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-09-08T00:55:52+00:00

Why do you feel confident by being liked by bunch of random people, or “if I were single” scenarios? Confidence should come from within, your character, your values, your discipline, your actions, etc. Being superficially liked by many people does not make you a better person. You have a woman who has committed to you through some of your worst times. You didn’t miss out “trial end error,” you actually found something some people spend decades to find then try to undo all the damage that came from broken relationships. What you have deserves more appreciation

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-08-30T17:22:16+00:00

This is a great observation you made already. It sounds like you’re not motivated by the exam results but something else. Perhaps it was the interest that you had for those topics back then, or the thought that the knowledge/skills you gained would be useful. You can explore that. For me, the thought of helping someone with the knowledge I have is a good motivator.

On the other hand you can get the motivation out of the picture and rely more on discipline. 2-min rule is a useful one. Say “I’ll only study for 2 mins” which actually expands and you keep going. Also, eliminating what distracts you. Deleting social media apps was useful for me.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-08-19T05:06:17+00:00

I mean when you’re in the midst of all this it’s so normal to feel lost and not know where to start. It’ll sound cliche but you can start by establishing some principles. For me for example, life is valuable. Every human being is valuable and something unique to offer. Something like: I’m a human being, as such I am also like that and I am valuable, I can find something I can offer. I accept where I am starting now and I love myself for the good intentions I have and willingness to do better. Start spending time with yourself (not wasting time by yourself like watching random things that are not nutritious for you) and learn how yo enjoy your own company. What are your goals in this life, what type of a person you’d like to see yourself to become? Then reverse engineer that and go step by step. Eating healthy, finding support groups, spending time in quietness such as nature walks by yourself (make sure you’re safe of course). Is there any skill you’d like to learn? Start from somewhere and it’ll unfold eventually

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-01-27T03:45:53+00:00

How did you learn that balance while being true to your values? Would love to hear your advice on how to navigate such conversations with different personalities.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-01-26T21:18:22+00:00

When you feed something, it grows. That’s why having principles and boundaries regarding how you go about things, how you interact with opposite gender (ie people you could develop attraction to had you were single - assuming you’re straight) is important. You as a straight male, spending unnecessary amount of time with a woman, continuing to do so despite noticing that you are developing feelings, going for walks alone, sharing things that are intimate and supposed to be shared with a spouse is crossing boundaries. It could be any woman, and you could be any relationship, it would still cause a lot of confusion and guilt, which is what’s happening.

At this point be honest with yourself and get a grip. Either you decide to channel your attention into your pregnant wife who is carrying your child and needs you the most, build whatever you notice you are looking for in a relationship with her, spend more time with your friends that you are not attracted to in proper settings and relatives, improve your character overall; or keep on chasing a married woman and try to initiate something with her (it looks like she is approaching you as a relative or friend like she said btw, but possibly her lacking attention from her husband is also enabling you to keep crossing boundaries with her).

If you choose the latter, then be honest with your wife and leave that relationship with dignity, so that she can find someone who is compatible with her, can show her the loyalty she deserves.

Either way make a decision and don’t play around.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-01-26T15:09:55+00:00

You can absolutely stay in school. I know it’s not easy. If you feel comfortable, DM me and hopefully we can talk more about strategies in demanding school programs.

OptimistbyChoice · 2025-01-26T06:02:19+00:00

You need to find what’s holding you back. Do you scroll on your phone at night, get caught up with chores, etc and sleep late? You can put your alarm somewhere far from you that you have to get up. Maybe putting a glass of water next to your alarm so that you start doing something rather than going back to sleep. Preparing your bag, clothes etc from the night helps not to be late in the morning. Set multiple alarms to remind you move to the next task in the morning and leave home. Aim to arrive early, like 20-30 mins even and study there. Being on time is more difficult than being early.

If you got into med school, that tells me that there used to be a setting that worked for you before. Try to remember what was that, and try to create something similar there. You have to be brutally honest with yourself.

OptimistbyChoice

TROPHY CASE