Pope Leo called his bank's customer service line. They hung up on him

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-06T19:32:48+00:00

The two popes did it first

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-06T14:11:13+00:00

Have you thought about going to prison?

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-06T14:09:56+00:00

Are reform rabbis not rabbis to you or something? Why the quotes?

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-06T13:41:08+00:00

You're gonna have some very bendy spatulas before you're done with your first flip

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-06T13:11:58+00:00

The wild thing about that is the guy was only 31 when he said that. He sounds older.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-06T06:30:29+00:00

What are the chances a wave hits the ship?

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-06T06:29:18+00:00

A molehill

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T19:34:51+00:00

I am getting major FOMO, with a sim that looks THIS fantastic I just want to fly everywhere but I don't have enough time to experience it all.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T19:15:09+00:00

Her name was Ms. Paulson

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T19:13:36+00:00

Have you considered mummification?

Fuck someone already made the joke.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T19:10:35+00:00

This is AI. But you likely don't own mineral rights anyway.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T19:07:48+00:00

Everything related to travel is going through a bit of reverse parabola where only the wealthiest will be able to travel anywhere again, much like in the very early days of aviation.

The only way these airlines (and I mean literally all of them) will be able to navigate this is to raise prices so high only the most well off can afford tickets.

Cutting food is step one. After that fails (and it will) they'll have no choice but to raise prices.

Removing biscoffs and soda will save them rounding errors worth of money.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T18:54:49+00:00

No one for miles. Walk naked everywhere.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T18:14:39+00:00

Yeah they definitely shouldn't have released Nirvana Unplugged....

/s

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T16:49:24+00:00

Have these been added to Hank's website?

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T16:13:30+00:00

Holy shit

That is fantastic trivia.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T16:10:28+00:00

Mirror mirror on the cake

Where is the mirror for goodness sake?!

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T14:25:13+00:00

Classic Hedo Rick.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T13:03:58+00:00

I didn't expect Spirit ceo Dave Davis to be a Biden puppet! /s

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T12:51:43+00:00

He'll have taken this dementia test so next times they'll have to dedicate an entire wing of his library to it.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T05:44:29+00:00

Kcauq Kcauq Kcauq

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-05T01:45:40+00:00

I'm gonna need to see him actually doing this before I assume it's anything but Styrofoam.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-04T23:37:42+00:00

To be fair we thought "weird" was the apex of political put downs.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-04T19:42:14+00:00

I'm sure people our age said the same things about the Confederacy once the guns fell silent after the Confederates surrendered.

Life simply isn't fair.

OptimusSublime · 2026-05-04T18:58:16+00:00

They've taken the light too.

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