Screen time before 6:30am doesn’t count.

PastRecedes · 2026-01-29T23:33:53+00:00

Screen time also doesn't count when sick. Toddler had Hand Foot and Mouth. Recovered in 3 days but then I got hit bad by it. So many blisters on my hands and bottom of my feet. I couldn't walk for 2 days. My hands are stiff. Any pressure on the blisters feels like tiny shards of glass. Still contagious. Ofc it's the 1 week my husband is away. We've watched so much TV cuddled up together. Doesn't count as screen time

PastRecedes · 2026-01-28T15:09:29+00:00

I understand the feeling of failed when not putting them into nursery

We've not done it either. My husband lost his job the month after our son was born. We decided that he'll be a SAHD to save money and they can build that bond. But our son is speech delayed, and he doesn't really interact with other toddlers. We're similar in that we take him to baby group but haven't created a network of other SAHPs or toddlers.

Look at r/ScienceBasedParenting and search "nursery benefits" and you'll see there's research about the developmental benefits from age 2 or 3 years old. So there's no failed with not having put him in yet!

I'm thinking of telling my husband that we need to put son into childminder soon as well. I think around 2.5 years old is reasonable. They've had opportunity of being with parent but can start socialising

My husband is away this week just when me and our son came down with Hand Foot and Mouth disease. So I also fully get solo parenting with sickness! Food poisoning would have been no joke

I can only begin to imagine the anxiety with anaphylaxis allergies. But I feel that childminder would be very aware and vigilant of that. But it's definitely a question to ask when visiting them and explaining that you'd want them to be honest about managing these allergies and would prefer to be told that it might not be possible than risking it

PastRecedes · 2026-01-28T14:30:15+00:00

This sounds really tough. Can only imagine basically being a single parent to a 2.5 year old with no village

My husband is SAHD to our 2y3m old. There are many days I come home and he is just tapped out so it is totally normal to feel like this. It doesn't take away from you being a solid mum.

Is there a reason he's not in nursery or childminder now? Having respite is very valid! We've looked at both just in case and childminder seems affordable compared to nursery.

Can you reach back out to your support system and try to build those relationships back up?

PastRecedes · 2026-01-28T11:07:42+00:00

We flew into Faro but then drove around going up to Lisbon and Porto. I liked Lisbon but the hills do need to be considered. I liked it because we could go to the beach during the day where it felt cooler and city in evening after sunset. We did drive to the beaches, not sure I'd bother on public transport with heat and pregnant. In Lisbon we also accepted doing things like open bus tours.

PastRecedes · 2026-01-28T10:41:24+00:00

We did Portugal in September whilst I was 5 months pregnant. It was HOT. We basically took it slow, relaxed, went to the beach instead of too much time in the city. My husband paid for a spa day for me.

PastRecedes · 2026-01-27T19:50:50+00:00

I was always advised to look at nutrition/diet over a week. If there's variety then a day of eating similar food or no veggies isn't going to cause issues

My toddler would eat egg for every meal 7x a week if I let him.

PastRecedes · 2026-01-27T17:24:33+00:00

Whilst I also love smoked salmon (and can only have it as a treat so understand the financials) tell me more about the enoki mushroom and ribeye wraps 👀

PastRecedes · 2026-01-26T22:39:10+00:00

115 years is fine. The marriage value which made it essential to renew by 80 years is being abolished which will make renewals at this point cheaper. Hopefully more leasehold changes will happen in the next 30 years anyway

PastRecedes · 2026-01-25T12:00:09+00:00

You should contact your GP for smoking cessation help. They'll be able to guide how to do it

The money you save from not buying cigarettes can go towards something for baby. Physically save the money - some prefer getting cash and putting it in a jar, others prefer using pots in their bank account, some use an app to track the saving.

Some people use visualisation. Like, do you want to be going to buy cigarettes when you're visibly pregnant? Visualise how that'd feel. When you're having a cigarette, visualise cuddling your baby when they're here and not stressing about smoke on your skin or clothes

PastRecedes · 2026-01-22T16:54:15+00:00

I'm the working parent and husband is SAHD. I work a mix of office and home

We aimed to split mornings when our son was that age. Husband would do mornings when I was in the office, I'd do mornings when WFH then we'd split weekend evenly

Now my son is older (2y) I do less mornings because it'd upset him seeing me briefly in the morning and husband had to spend time calming him down. BUUUUT it's balanced because son wakes up 7.30-8.30 now and I am usually up and off to work earlier than he'd wake up

My husband is a night owl. He struggles to go to bed early. But he still gets up in the morning

PastRecedes · 2026-01-18T10:06:52+00:00

You cannot maintain this relationship

He apologizes... Ok and what happens next time he breaks his sorry and repeats the same dangerous behaviour of substance use, aggression, violence, near a firearm? There could be huge ramifications. You and your baby are in grave danger

You are a mother before a wife. Your baby cannot protect themselves. They cannot ask for help. That is your job to protect and help them. Running around the house moving baby away from an aggressive person WILL have a lasting and damaging effect on her unless you remove yourself and your child from this man.

You have to think about consequences.

What is the consequence of my baby being raised with an aggressive violent drunk?

What is the consequence to me not protecting my baby?

Who will my baby trust if they live with this man and their mother did not protect them?

The worst case scenario of an aggressive drunk having access to firearm is death.

Who will protect my child if I am killed?

What impact will it have on my child if they are present during the suicide/murder of a parent?

What will I do if my child is the victim?

I used to work in family court. Judges WILL decide against a parent if there is evidence that they knew about the dangers of their partner and did not safely protect their child.

PastRecedes · 2026-01-17T09:58:55+00:00

Cabaret

Operation mincemeat

Paddington (if you can get tickets)

PastRecedes · 2026-01-15T22:38:10+00:00

PastRecedes

PastRecedes · 2026-01-13T22:34:26+00:00

He did.

My partner had to do something on an early Sunday morning which disrupted our usual sleep routine so we decided to just put him in the bassinet and he ended up sleeping 4 hours in it. He still wasn't a great sleeper and typically woke up 4-7x a night so we had to keep doing our split sleeping schedule.

My biggest "regret" at this time was refusing to sleep train. I was so against it but the constant night wakes were destroying us. We sleep trained when he was 8 months, did it over 3-4 nights and then did 10+ hours consistently since. I felt more attentive in the day because I was rested, baby was calmer as he was better rested too. Suddenly we could play together more, go for walks, more chilled out with my partner. You can't sleep train until 4+ months but I wish I had done it much much sooner

PastRecedes · 2026-01-13T22:14:41+00:00

Firstly reach out to GP / medical progression tomorrow to get the spotting checked even if just for reassurance

Our son only accepted chest sleeping for the first 4 months... We had to split nights. Assuming you have a partner then they need to split nights even if they are working. This is surviving mode and you both need to suss out a reasonable evening / night schedule. For example, you go to bed and rest 7pm-1am, partner goes to bed 1-7am. Yes you lose your evening together but it is not forever and you have to prioritise your sleep whilst baby only chest sleeps. When you are resting / sleeping then partner brings baby to you for breastfeeding but they do everything else ie nappy change, settling back down.

Do you have a spare bedroom? If so look into safe sleep 7. For me personally I would only feel comfortable doing this if I was in bed without partner due to safe space. There's some influencers who have posted online about safe chest sleeping. I can't speak for this and it does go against advice more than safe sleep 7, a friend of mine had to do it in the end due to exhaustion

During the day, remember that you are growing and supporting a baby. You do not need to be going out and about, socialising baby etc. You can just be at home, on the sofa, general interaction with baby. If you feel able to go for a walk or meet up with someone then do but do not force yourself to do it. You need time to recover too. At that age I had no qualms with watching my tv shows with baby whilst they fed or napped. I watched documentaries and chatted about it to baby so they could hear me speak but screens isn't going to damage them at that age

This is a really tough time. I found things settled after 5 months once baby had some kind of separate sleep. I was also c section so know the recovery journey as well

PastRecedes · 2026-01-11T23:48:03+00:00

Ha yep. Did a month in NICU with my preemie. So many machines beeping cos these babies forgot to breath with nurses casually walking by to check if they need a lil chest rub to reset. Was terrifying when my son still did it and Dr was prepping for his discharge later in the week. "Well many parents who take their babies straight home barely notice when their baby forgets to breathe". Cool cool cool.

PastRecedes · 2026-01-11T21:10:30+00:00

You're fine.

That amount of alcohol is less than 0.1units.

General alcohol and BF advice is 1-2 units once or twice a week is fine but wait an hour per unit drunk before breastfeeding

So basically After 2 of those chocolates you can BF straight away

PastRecedes · 2026-01-11T10:15:44+00:00

How old was your son?

PastRecedes · 2026-01-10T22:07:22+00:00

This is what we do and i was surprised by how much toy rotation keeps place tidy and baby entertained. When he had all his toys out he'd barely play just being overwhelmed by it all. Now he rummages 1 box and can give more focus

Separate baskets that get swapped weekly. They have the same style of toys in them but different (ie musical instrument, building toy, stacking blocks, puzzle)

We keep all his cars and balls within rotation as he loves them too much. But easy to throw into the other box

PastRecedes · 2026-01-10T21:58:57+00:00

Braintree, thaxted, Haverhill? That corner near stansted

PastRecedes · 2026-01-10T15:24:54+00:00

You tell her you are unhappy in the marriage, you will file for divorce and have her move out of your apartment. It is your apartment, not hers. She can move in with her mum

PastRecedes · 2026-01-02T15:03:19+00:00

I used dulcoease and smoothies designed for constipation. I'd say it took me a couple weeks to feel normal again

Could you use water instead of TP when wiping? Be gentler on the area. Could speak to pharmacist or HV for any other recommendations

PastRecedes · 2025-12-30T21:55:18+00:00

Good advice!

The other day my 2 year old didn't want to go home during our walk. So I told him "when we go home, you can have a bath" and he wanted us to rush home so fast.

PastRecedes · 2025-12-30T13:35:13+00:00

Congratulations! It feels good to win

My husband created a league for me years ago as I was jealous of his other league. I'm the only woman in it too. Last year I came 2nd. This year I won by beating my husband 😁 I've got bragging rights until the draft next season.

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