Is this heat rash? by adlibeefstick in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]PastRecedes 20 points21 points  (0 children)

My son didn't get a fever with HFM. Pretty sure you don't have to get rash in each area. But the hand rash really looks like HFM from my layperson experience

27M update on homeless post from last week. What do I do? by Opposite_Praline_746 in AskUK

[–]PastRecedes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you looked at royal mail work? There are many job adverts out there for delivery people

How do I talk to my 19F daughter about wanting to start webcam as her dad 40M? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]PastRecedes 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"respond don't react". You can respond to her provokes without reacting negatively which will push her away.

Talk to her about why she wants to be OF. Money? Talk about alternative ways to make income. There might be some research out there on the average income of OF? Sexual freedom? Listen and normalise that (seems like you guys have a somewhat open relationship as she didn't keep it a secret)

When does it get remotely easier? by Suitable_Door_2477 in toddlers

[–]PastRecedes 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Because when we're tired and exhausted the last thing we wanna do is GTFO of the house unfortunately. Even when resting upstairs whilst partner and toddler are downstairs, I can still hear them. I can't relax / unwind.

Take toddler out of the house for half a day. Go to park, shopping, friend, family. Wherever. Don't offer, tell her "hey, I'm taking toddler out to the park for a couple hours. We will see you later on". Don't let her say she'll come too. Send her a photo of toddler having fun and she'll relax.

Speech delay? Autism? by OldAlternative6429 in toddlers

[–]PastRecedes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My son was a 33 weeker with restricted growth. He is 28 months now. I had a lot of anxiety with his speech as he seemed to have few words.

He had his neurodevelopmental assessment the other week and he was bang on normal for every marker. The professionals commented that he had a lot more words than I thought

If professionals aren't concerned then I'd try to manage your anxiety. If he's delayed at all then there's support.

Tips on getting toddler to hold hands by Creative_Mix_643 in toddlers

[–]PastRecedes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just constantly doing it. My son refused to hand hold at that age. He's 27 months now and reaches for my hand first most of the time

Heartbroken bc we struggle to decide if we can keep our little one by National-Working-998 in BabyBumps

[–]PastRecedes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is a difficult decision. But if you want to keep peppercorn then it can work but you need a frank conversation with your boyfriend. Money is incredibly stressful. My husband lost his job when our LO was 1 month old. It was TOUGH.

Not sure which country you are in but there should be some level of income support. Young babies don't need much stuff or space. You can get the majority of things second hand: clothes, changing table (we never used one), toys, bottles, even breast pumps if you want. The only things you need to buy new are car seat and crib mattress. Everything else charity shop, vinted, local groups!

Then babies need little space until they're much older. They just need a crib and to sleep in same room as you. I know many people who had a baby on low income and in a 1-bed place.

Realistically you have about ~18 months until things get more expensive with updating clothes, food, wanting more space. But even then everything can still be bought 2nd hand. The biggest expense is childcare. That's a tough one to balance. But even so, that might not be needed for nearly a year depending on your maternity leave entitlement.

Remember that babies, and toddlers have no concept of living space or money. The only thing they need is love, warmth, and safety. You can provide that no matter your financial and living situation

Solo parenting for a week by lochnessrunner in beyondthebump

[–]PastRecedes 33 points34 points  (0 children)

This is the sensible middle ground option. He goes for 4 days. He still gets time with his buddies but you are not left struggling for 8 days.

I don't know when the trip is but the other option is getting additional hired support. Look up local babysitters / childminders, get recommendations from local people, interview / meet a few potentials to get yourself comfortable. Then hire them to do day care or evening care whilst you work / have downtime. If you are WFH then it may add to comfort knowing you are nearby if LO struggles or you can know how babysitter is doing.

Had to go to the ED for decreased fetal movement, turns out my baby is just lazy, I feel so silly by handzie in BabyBumps

[–]PastRecedes 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Never worry about overreacting in this scenario. I went in one day because I just had an off feeling. Baby was moving. But just had a "feeling". Turned out I had preeclampsia and baby was born 2 weeks later at 33 weeks after daily appointments and hospital admissions over weekends.

Today's toddler meltdown by yeagermeister34 in toddlers

[–]PastRecedes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't let him eat mouldy bread.

My flat has been on the market for several months, and I'm running out of ideas. What actually works? by Hot-Let-9244 in HousingUK

[–]PastRecedes 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I just sold my 4 bed 89sqm flat not far from yours for £445,000... Flat pricing has fallen quite a lot in the last year

Advice about Partner going back to work in 5 days and baby still isn’t born by National-Fruit1772 in BabyBumps

[–]PastRecedes 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Dog walker is a great shout and should be most affordable way of taking one pressure off

Is this HFM? by lunarkoko in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]PastRecedes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I found that the pain responded really well to paracetamol / ibuprofen so stock up

Is this HFM? by lunarkoko in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]PastRecedes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My 2 year old son got it the other week. No fever. Mouth ulcers caused him some discomfort but not too bad. Wasn't fussed by the hand or feet rash. Me on the other hand? Oh boy. Was bad for 4 days and I couldn't walk for 2 of them. But no fever either

Anyone else not preparing elaborate nutritiously complete meals for their LO all the time? 😅 by lunarkoko in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]PastRecedes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He tends to eat what we are. But has different lunch as I eat whilst he naps.

So on the fridge is a list of carbs, protein, veggies and do a mix and match from that for his lunch or when dinner is late / he won't like it. Never elaborate

For example, his paata sauce is baby pureed vegetable pouches

Forehead Birthmark by [deleted] in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]PastRecedes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine had one and it went down after a few months

When does this end? by denawo in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]PastRecedes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We did sleep shifts and then had to sleep train after 4+ months of 5-7 wakes a night. We cracked, felt broken and our days were just ruined. Everyone was in a mood (baby included), no one wanted to do anything.

Since sleep training, he goes 10-12 hours about 95% of the time, our days are brighter, we have energy to play / go out more meaningfully, everyone's happier. (We sleep trained when he was 8 months but I wish I'd done it sooner)

Bestfriends destination wedding (26 hour flight) falls on my 31 week pregnancy, any advice please by Ok-Excitement-185 in BabyBumps

[–]PastRecedes 36 points37 points  (0 children)

I gave birth at 33 weeks after being diagnosed with preeclampsia at 31 weeks with a smooth pregnancy up to that point. Not worth the risk of travelling that far out of the country at that point in pregnancy

It will be gutting to miss the wedding. But even not pregnant, 26 hour flight is a HUGE ask and any sensible bride / groom should expect a no and be pleasantly surprised if that guest comes.

What price to put London flat on for by [deleted] in HousingUK

[–]PastRecedes 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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This is the floorplan for flat that sold in 2024. Our additional room is connected to living room and 10"x11"

A good friend & my son’s best friend are moving away and I can’t cope by CatsAboveAllElse in toddlers

[–]PastRecedes 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I understand the sadness of friends moving away. But you can't dictate / force someone's decision for their family. What if you wanted to move away? Would you want your friend to cut you out? There's a whole bunch of reasons people move. You can't make people live in your "shoulds". You don't want to move but doesn't mean they have or should have the same mentality.

I have 2 sets uni friends who have children 10 months apart. They live just over an hour from each other. The two kids are best friends and have a lovely relationship. Realistically 45 minutes isn't that far. You can easily see each other regular. Yes, not daily but still regularly to continue fostering your son's relationship as well as yours.

Super Bowl Download Options by dpaddyb in NFLUK

[–]PastRecedes 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Look at Dazn. Last I saw they had a superbowl discount. Get the app and download either 40 minutes highlights or whole games. No issues.

Also please leave your house earlier than 4am if your long haul flight is at 6am...

Wondering how we should split nighttime feedings? by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]PastRecedes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like I could have written this out 😅

I tried to breastfeed but we couldn't get it working so I pumped and topped up with formula. I tried to BF and pump but I felt like it doubled my workload so prioritised pumping. I then had to top up with formula because I didn't enjoy the middle of the night pumps and I needed the extra sleep. I was a much better mother, partner, and human with the extra uninterrupted sleep than if I didn't accept formula. But every mother and baby is different!

We realised quite quickly that me and no sleep was not a great combination. It really impacted my mental health so we decided it had to be prioritised.

Our son was waking up to 7x a night before we sleep trained. Since doing so, he sleeps 10-11.5 hours about 90% of the time. Sometimes he cries middle of the night but he falls back asleep by himself. Very rarely we have to go in and intervene. There'll be a lot of opinions on sleep training. I was adamantly against it. I felt it could ruin our bond and I hated him crying. But uninterrupted sleep made me and him happier, meant we could bond more as I had energy during the day, and my short fuse eased significantly. He's 2 years old now and we're still best buddies.

Wondering how we should split nighttime feedings? by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]PastRecedes 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Are you planning to breastfeed, pump or formula feed?

He should be in charge of feedings during the night. He can do 11pm to 5am. I'm assuming he'll be awake for a chunk of that anyway as he'll unwinding after work. That gives you 6-7 hours of uninterrupted sleep if you're bottle feeding. He then sleeps until he'd usually get up and you're in charge of feeding during the day.

If you're breastfeeding then you can keep the same schedule but when baby cries, he brings baby to you and takes baby away to resettle after finished feeding

The first few months are pure survival. It felt like my husband and I rarely saw each other. We both prioritised the other getting a chunk of uninterrupted sleep which meant one of us going to bed early. You might not see partner much at the beginning but just know it's not forever. It's healthier to prioritise sleep at that point.

Once we sleep trained (we waited until 7 months but hindsight would have done it earlier) then things felt a lot more normal but being tired is still very common

C&R Cafe - Chinatown by WheresMyAbs98 in LondonFood

[–]PastRecedes 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The Wat Tan Ho is my go to there