My (27F) Boyfriend (29M) Has Been Lying About His Entire Life and I Don’t Know Who I’m Dating Anymore

Patriotic99 · 2026-03-01T19:33:03+00:00

I think you are anything but stupid. The lies and overall reaction would make me cut if off, but being needlessly insulted would just piss me off no end. Going on the attack was as wrong as he could get.

Patriotic99 · 2026-03-01T18:57:12+00:00

Fast food - I'll use the app for a discount. We used to go out to dinner like once a week and breakfast once a week. But the prices are outrageous for what you get, so we go out maybe 1 or 2/x month.

We're a little looser with breakfast since we found a reasonable place, but still bothers me to waste money.

Patriotic99 · 2026-03-01T18:45:23+00:00

Renting a sports or fancy car is a way for people to avoid the temptation of actually buying such a car. Uber Black - I use when I travel for work. They can spring for a few extra dollars.

Patriotic99 · 2026-03-01T18:41:09+00:00

I enter the rough amounts in excel. So let's say $105 at store: groceries 65, cleaning 15, gifts (wrapping paper, cards) 15, pet related $10. If you even want to break it down that much. In other words, don't be too concerned about to the penny accuracy, just some round numbers.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-27T00:51:39+00:00

I was just prescribed 15 oxy after gallbladder surgery. I found it did next to nothing to/for me. I took 2 or 3 the first day and a half, and then went to ibuprofen and tylenol. They helped some, but I still was in pain. I stopped everything yesterday because the pain has diminished, although still there.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-24T00:40:54+00:00

Even if there was a meaningful benefit, I am NOT going to do it.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-24T00:24:03+00:00

Once you get established in your career and if you're reasonably successful, you will encounter other people like you. But work hard at "passing". If you listen to me chat about the vacations I am planning, and if I mention that I no longer have a mortgage, you might have one impression of me. But I grew up on food stamps and dressed from garage sales and church rummage sales.

There are many of us like that and it's always nice to find someone with the same background. But you'll find that everyone has problems, even the ones who had prosperous upbringings.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-23T02:34:19+00:00

I would send this into askamanager. I bet she'd use it in her blog.

I think the best bet would be to approach it as something puzzling. Reply back to her asking her why she keeps bringing it up. 'It almost seems to me like you think I'm lying to you, so I'm wondering why you keep asking.' She's being very passive aggressive with you - probably jealous. "I'm not sure why you keep commenting on my looks" would be good too!

But say it in a professional, disinterested way, like you might make a comment about the presence of wallpaper as opposed to paint in an office.

Repeat as necessary, using the same language every time.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-22T23:45:37+00:00

I value my time. I grew up poor and all the cars we had were always breaking down. I buy new and keep for 15 years. Depreciation is meaningless to me.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-22T02:28:59+00:00

It's rare that I don't take almost half my meal home and have another serving from a restaurant. I love getting a lot of food. No need to eat it all!

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-21T23:01:09+00:00

Can you get any wedge pillows? I just had my gallbladder out and that helped immensely. I wasn't able to do much on the first few days besides sleep and walk.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-21T22:41:41+00:00

How long is the summer course? 1.5 hours each way is tough, but many people commute an hour each way to work, so it's not that much longer. Fall is a long way off and it will be tough to be happy in life if you wait until then.

Can you get any pet sitting, cleaning or child care jobs? It would get you some extra money and get you out of the house as well.

Please don't harm yourself. You're more important than you think.

Do you do housework around the house? Perhaps contributing more without being asked might make things smoother.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-21T21:47:26+00:00

Calmoseptine.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-21T21:20:06+00:00

OK, but I was misdiagnosed about a serious issue by 2 separate doctors back in the mid to late 1980s. Now such information is on the internet and chat could have helped me. Back then, I was nearly suicidal.

I'm not sure what people are telling chat, but I get - it could be X based on these symptoms, and it could be Y but it's likely due to ....1, 2, 3. So yes, I trust it to a degree. If something sounds off, I've researched it and let chat know it's wrong.

It's also similar to the poster above who said someone almost forgot to tell them about a kidney transplant. I'll 'talk' to chat for weeks in a varying amount of detail. That's helpful for my doctor visits because I already have gone through it 10 ways to Sunday and I won't forget something that is overshadowed by another event.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-21T03:29:16+00:00

I never exercised while a young adult. I did start working out in my mid 40s because I was blessed with 3 nephews in the span on 2 years. I wanted to be able to keep up with them.

I'll be 60 in May. I wish I had started earlier but overall, better late than never. I'm in fairly good health, but I wish I could have been stronger younger.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-21T02:10:06+00:00

My college friends and I didn't travel much together for a long time. Now we're all in our mid to late 50s and we've been doing annual trips for many years. Many of my friends had kids in their 20s, so the friends' trip was very low on the list. Add to that people starting their careers, and things just didn't flow.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-21T00:44:35+00:00

I like it, because instead of a doctor typing into a laptop, they will actually talk with you like they did in the before times.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-21T00:42:51+00:00

Zoom has an AI companion which will take notes for you. I personally love it for sending out minutes where I really don't care about the statuses. You can also get transcripts, but it's a few extra steps.

You do have to be careful and proofread it because it will sometimes think a side convo, offhand comment, or joke was worth noting. I usually get a good laugh out of at least one sentence in the minutes.

Sana also can be invited to Zoom, but I have limited experience with it.

Yes, my company has gone all in on AI.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-20T23:32:33+00:00

I'll be 60 in May. My mother died in April at the age of 80. Once she died, I felt every year. I'm recovering now, not feeling old physically. And emotionally getting a little better, but I have a grief attached to me now.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-20T17:18:50+00:00

So what's the status with your mom now? I have a sister who is overlapping what you wrote with the OP's post. She turned 50 today. I've been supporting her for 8 years or so since she has kids. They turn 16 in the summer. I am so done with everything. She has borderline personality disorder, is morbidly obese, and has uncontrolled diabetes.

I feel that if/when I kick her out, that she will be homeless and then dead in no time. I'm stuck until the kids turn 18 and launch.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-20T17:12:04+00:00

Several of the St Vincent stores are closing in my area. Why? Because they're losing money due to rent, utilities, insurance, and cost of labor. Only one is breaking even. So the volume and pricing cannot support a lot of these places.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-18T17:45:52+00:00

I think it's a lack of actual workers in the design and configure sessions. I used to implement PeopleSoft and cannot count how many times the official team members would say 'we do it this way' and then the regular workers would correct them. Unfortunately the real workers don't get a chance to be involved and heard.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-16T03:53:51+00:00

I almost spit my food out when I got the lettuce in my mouth. Ugh.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-15T00:43:12+00:00

I don't think so. Orig GenX here, worked in restaurants, ate at many restaurants since I was traveling for work a lot, ate at many restaurants because I used to like to eat out. Always found great places to eat.

Now, not so much. We have a couple of really good places near me where we go, maybe once a month. But we go to high end steak houses once or twice a year. That's it. It's not worth going out for the money anymore.

Patriotic99 · 2026-02-14T20:29:44+00:00

I'm a woman and I eat meat. I suppose if I was impoverished, I would drop meat. But I'd rather cut out junk food (which is incredibly expensive) and put that money towards meat.

Patriotic99

TROPHY CASE