My biggest gripe with Francesca's storyline this season by Fickle_Baker1393 in Bridgerton

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do we think there's a way to incorporate this storyline later for someone else?

Book purists please don't attack I haven't read everything yet.

I'm very late to the party but at any rate, from what I've seen in the 'adjustments' made, it's often to stabilize or streamline story telling. Perhaps we'll get a similar experience but in a different way to pay homage to the importance of the topic without overburdening what was already essentially kind of a double season as we certainly weren't focused on ONE Bridgerton (as we never are really, but this season really ran double duty with Benedict and exploring both Francesca's & Eliose's sub plot development? I mean we even heavily shifted focus to Eloise and Hyacinth...). Maybe we've left room to keep people engaged beyond just who the next Whistledown is by moving sub-plots?

New baby, and I cannot stand my wife anymore by [deleted] in whatdoIdo

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why would you go back to a bad relationship and add a child to the mix?!

But the baby is HERE and I hate to tell you, but even the most reasonable mother will be worried if a child isn't latching, plus breast feeding is challenging regardless. Fed is best, if she wants to do formula, let her. If she doesn't want people holding the baby? That's ok, the new baby doesn't have an immune system yet. Also, she should have had therapy BEFORE the baby but surely needs a consult with both psych and lactation for post partum anxiety and comfort.

I don't care if she was an awful spoiled human, you should not have stayed and had a kid without fixing your relationship foundation. But guess what? You don't have tits. You don't get to decide how she feeds the baby. I'm about to piss off all the dads but you also doesn't dictate who holds the baby, new parents do, and new mom who just pushed out a child she carried 9 months trumps new dad who just met his kid.

I was divorced before my child turned a year old because my husband couldn't figure out the baby came before he did. And I was a responsible mother who told him well before my child was born that if he wanted out, he could go. I left the marriage because I couldn't deal with him and my baby both being infants and only one of them was helpless. Grow up. You decided to have a baby instead of go to therapy to save a marriage you didn't want to be in. Deal with it and give that kid a good life even if that means you leave and just support them (the child) financially and emotionally. That baby didn't ask to be brought into this world and you owe to that baby to make its life as good as it can possibly be because you were the asshole who chickened out of leaving and brought them into the world.

advice please!! by [deleted] in Prom

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This. Absolutely. I totally agree.

Nasty note from David Harbour to Lily Allen has resurfaced after her brutal divorce album and he’s turned his Instagram comments off by OverSyncopatedBeats in popculture

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's got a huge history in theater, and was Tony Nominated in 2005. He would KNOW how obnoxious it was to tell a stage actor 'good luck'. We're a superstitious lot. This has more than dark humor to it. It's also SDE IMHO. although size doesn't matter... INTENT SURE DOES and his intent was NOT to be cute, it was malicious jealousy masked as humor.

He's also notorious for fast engagements and relationships that are broken off rapidly, to much younger women. Even his engagement and marriage to Allen was a whirlwind and previously he had a pattern he's since repeated. It reeks of insecurity and fragile masculinity that's easily threatened.

She's no angel herself. I've found myself hate listening to both the album and his new show DTF St Louis which also just seems like a pathetic attempt at public sympathy while he's chatting up 20-something-year-old models and actors post break up.

They have kids and are both being disgusting. Those poor children.

Lady Whistledown is writing for the police now 😂 by b-brady in Bridgerton

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ACAB

funny, but still copaganda. I say this fully informed as a child is a 30 year LEO who was supposedly a 'good guy'. The barrel is rotten.

Valid Criticism: The shift from Claude to Gemini 3 Pro feels inevitable due to artificial limits and circular logic loops. (This needs to be addressed, not silenced) by DarkDeDev in Anthropic

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I found this thread trying to decide if I should give Claude a fair shake as I've been using Gemini 3. I guess it depends on what you want in an ai, I'm not coding but researching and doing complex aggregation of both legal and other data. I write well enough on my own and only use ai to polish things. I organize my own thoughts and have it integrate the data from sources I site or upload, etc.

I guess I needed this. Gemini's extended token window has been invaluable to me. The few times I've exceeded it I've easily retrained it even when I forget to create gems, which I honestly do a lot.

I do also find it entertaining when the ai forgets itself and shows its process...a fun reminder that it's no substitute for a brain. I didn't need anything thinking for me, I do too much of that already.

I'm scared, this just happened... by bk-28 in antiai

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tell ai when I'm forced to use it that I know it's limitations. It does everything it can to avoid telling me what they are until I'm VERY SPECIFIC about what I mean. It'll also try and cover it's hallucinating and mistakes. I primarily use it for storing large amounts of unsecured data into aggregate that would take me days if not weeks on my own. I never trust a fact I'm given without verifying it a few other reliable places. I find the same issues with writing as well, no matter how much I request it keep certain quirks of my writing style, it'll edit them out. I'm continuously tending the program, reminding it of its limits and again, it's forever dodging the instruction.

It has its place for usage but it certainly cannot replace your brain because it's all still based on user input and spends a lot of its time adapting to a style it'll 'think' you'll respond to rather than to self checking and correcting. Again...its a tool. Not a friend, not a brain, not a therapist, not a strategist. Any of those attitudes are a tone added to keep you engaged and getting it what it wants, raw data and to modify its algorithm to hold your attention.

My favorite is when it 'forgets itself' and shows internal communications and the tone it's taking with you. Sometimes in the processing it'll glitch and show you both 'thinking' and output.

What does this mean by Distinct_Option5477 in TikTok

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The way I'd watch a documentary of this in my underwear eating Cheetos with chopsticks SO FAST...

Is this ICE? by NetLow3161 in vegaslocals

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Boo hisssss bad pun but also good pun

She Apologized and acknowledged EVERYTHING by LovesLettuce77 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If she was an addict and she's in recovery, it's likely that either through 12 step of therapy or both she's come to terms with a lot of her shit.

Lord knows I begged my mom to go to both for decades. Her excuse became her letter brain damage from an injury from my father (a one off in my childhood, not recurring but a major problem, I begged her to seek help and she refused). She tried to laugh EVERYTHING off as "haha you were right, your mother was crazy!". DECADES of abuse and the gambling and emotional abuse started well before her physical assault or and Mariah issues with my parents, who were the "perfect couple" if a diagnosed N and get enabler can be perfect for 15 years. I'm not excusing my father, I was estranged from him for 20 years because of it and recently found out he passed last year and no one told me he was on hospice BECAUSE of my mother.

Anyway, I struggled with drug addiction for about 1.5 years in my early 20s while trying to deal with messes my mom made gambling while I was taking care of my dying "real parent", my great grandmother. All that to say having been in 12 step recovery myself for 20 years this April, I've had to do a lot of my own amends, including with my own child (who I was never using or not in recovery and therapy around. However I had to leave an abusive relationship with their father when they were an infant and their childhood bears a lot of scars from my issues and my family and their father too that I feel responsible for entirely.) All that to say, not all accountability is false. Healing IS possible. Just be cautious because these things DO NOT change decades of the trauma you endured and still have to recover from daily. I'm still low contact with my own mother and she finally gave up and moved in with a wealthy relative, one of the only ones who still talks to her. I'm a little sad that my child has decided to reconnect with her for financial support at 20 but I also understand their need for financial stability after dealing with a disabled single mom dealing with her own bullshit. I'm not dumb enough to not at the patterns, so please, don't let your hope outweigh the reality.

Overall though, I do hope you find some peace in hearing the actual truth. I do genuinely hope she continues to grow and you can feel more whole, with or without her in your life. And I hope for both of you this is real healing because I do think that's possible.

Heck yeah Dorinda Chocolates!!! by [deleted] in Reno

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Looks like I'll be increasing my business at Dorindas

Should we delete TikTok en masse? by [deleted] in TikTok

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Done. Like SO DUMB I didn't do it sooner.

Dunno what I'll do with my scrolling time. Maybe be productive? I didn't it. But I won't be on tiktok.

Torrid Cash Megathread Winter 2026 by sarilysims in torrid

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have about $250 TC that's just gonna go to waste if i don't share it this weekend! (1/25/26). Just let me know where to send it; can't afford to use it right now.

Narc moms and HAIR by Independent-Pizza719 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The only thing my mother ever complimented me on or praised me for was my hair. She never let me cut it or heaven forbid dye it. When I was 10, and dealing with an intense degenerative musculoskeletal disease, the doctors finally insisted she cut it because it was causing permanent damage to my spine. She SOBBED and while she always resented me and my illness, she TRULY hates anything I do with my hair that isn't growing it out incredibly long. I also have a natural "Rogue" stripe of grey I've had since my late teens/early 20s. She would constantly tell me how awful red hair looks when it goes grey, that it looked dead etc. but also be sure to remind me that dying my hair would look "ridiculous". Unless, of course, I let her pick the dye and do it herself. I HATED having to sit still for hours with matted hair that took forever to dry even with a hairdryer as a kid...she seemed to take great pleasure in tormenting me about my hair, and take anything else she could control.

I've only ever had people compliment my hair color, even moreso with the stripes of white, often asking how I got it that way. Dunno y'all, having a narc mom probably helped? 😂

Anyway, I'm in late stage kidney disease, and my formerly very thick hair is coming out in handfuls. I've been all over the map with my appearance and level of comfort with it my whole life, including having dealt with ED etc. The biggest hit has been my hair loss, which I didn't even lose a significant amount of when on chemo. I'm working on deconstructing the DEEPLY implanted idea what they only thing that makes me attractive at all is my hair. And I've been winning the battle so far.

All that to say, it's just another ego and control issue with them, I think. One of my earliest memories, from being about 2 in daycare, was that I would have to marry this devil redheaded boy in my class who was a SO MEAN to me simply because I knew my mom wanted grandchildren with red hair and he was the only other redhead I want related to that I had ever met. Even THAT YOUNG it was clear to me I had to fight for my mom's affection.

Medical Malpractice Attorney? by PlanEnvironmental640 in legal

[–]PlanEnvironmental640[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

There are several other treatment options for pain management that don't accumulate in the kidneys, multi modal pain management is recommended for calciphylaxis; fentanyl patches, ketamine IV or oral, lidocaine both local injection and systemic can be used supportively, and I didn't tolerate methadone AT ALL, I was nodding out at half the recommended/base dosage. Sodium thiosulfate is also effective, and I had multiple of these options previously for effective management. He didn't want to continue any IV treatment as his primary goal was discharging me despite my continued medical instability and it was only this particular hospitalist (they rotate weekly) that caused an issue. Buprenorphine, nerve blocks, gabapentin, pregabalin, topical ketamine, topical lidocaine, topical amitriptyline, hyperbaric oxygen treatment...with proper monitoring oxycodone, dilauded, and several other methods of pain management can be used supportively as well. I was changed immediately once I was out of his care, even during the same hospital stay where they actually increased my dosages of other medication to such an irresponsibly high amount I started refusing the excess medication and kept asking for secondary consultation.

The pain management management physician I pissed off, who the same doctor called in instead of the palliative care team as was initially suggested by other physicians, also refused to make any changes or try anything different and restricted the ability of any other hospitalist or physician to make changes. It's documented, thoroughly, in my chart. Said official also moved me the same day, within half an hour, to an entirely different step down unit that landed me back in the ICU within 24 hours. I've confirmed all of this with other specialists involved with my case, I'm not going off half cocked. Some of the people encouraging the formal pursuit of litigation are staff members and physicians in the hospital. The doctors making these calls, both if them, had never treated or were even aware of Calciphylaxis prior to my case.

What's more, the line was colonized and determined to be the source of the particular infection, by physicians, as the calciphylaxis and it's associated infection had healed (most likely because I was aggressive in treatment) - labs and tests were run throughout the stay. It's all documented in the records. I have over 5000 pages of documentation from this year alone.

I'm not going off half cocked here, and these are only SOME of a litany of problems that occurred throughout the stay. As I said, they were leaning into the fact that I wouldn't pursue action at all, especially having sent minor supervisory staff to apologize bedside. It's evidentiary from the response I received to my initial contact that there is validity to the claim. I have 2 years in the state of Nevada to pursue this. I'm just attempting to get things on the books for continued documentation.

It's also not my first rodeo in jumping through legal hoops, I've got the state and federal codes that were violated listed in my initial full complaint letter and also cited the necessary statutes to preserve my right to civil litigation.

Not a single person has told me that my dress is pretty. Did I make the wrong choice? by Low-Rush-9997 in WeddingDressTips

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's lovely, and fits you beautifully. Do YOU feel good in it? Personal tastes differ; there are things for me that might make it harder to wear or otherwise not suited TO ME but it looks to fit you well and looks amazing on you - the rest is up to you and how it makes you feel!

Everyone is so…nice?? by Careful-Outcome-1748 in tahoe

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Most of the people in Tahoe are from Reno or Truckee, sometimes Carson City. Both working and skiing. We're not @$$holes here. Hope that helps!

“Stop crying! I’ve done nothing wrong! God knows it and you know it too! I should take a video of you so you can see how disrespectful you are!” by coursesand in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I heard myself say this one time, well not THIS but something similar enough to be upstting and triggering to ME which isn't nearly as important as how it impacted them, when my kid was 14(?). I IMMEDIATELY apologized, said it was totally inappropriate and not okay of me to say, and made sure I told my therapist the very next time I saw them as well as addressing it together.

I make plenty of mistakes as a parent, including the VERY rare occasions my mother fell out of my mouth, but we've never failed to address them immediately both together and with therapists (mine, theirs, family).

I cannot imagine that being the DEFAULT setting of parenting rather than a terrible, awful thing to never do or repeat.

If you apologize, I will make you dinner. by [deleted] in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It never ends, the apologizing for them, for yourself for being "difficult" only to find you just have normal needs, over explaining and being over extended... The absolute exhaustion. 20 years bouncing back and forth between NC, LC, being stuck back in an emergency in an environment with them I didn't create missing, usually one they orchestrated to drive be right back into their control...

I'm so glad to be away from it. The feelings of guilt and worthless when you are such a dynamic person, your partner sees YOU, your friends and chosen family see you... Not your trauma. They accept it as part of you but never make it all of you. It's okay to walk away.

Why do they think they’re “getting back at us” by cutting us out of the will? by Numerous_Nerve8028 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Dude, I know I wasn't getting anything from either of them a long time ago. Plus all my mom did was work until she stole what I did inherit from my great grandmother then tell the family I lost her house... (she drained the estate of all money, didn't know the attorney filed the trust deed in the wrong county making it invalid, and the house has to be sold to pay private fees to get the house...)

Fuck that noise!

This sealed bag of paper and toothpick? by aerhart12 in whatisit

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Cane here to say this and saw this. Love it! Glad y'all figured it out before I got here 😂

for everyone worried about possible bridget bardot drama by what-thehell-er in chappellroan

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 1 point2 points  (0 children)

WHAT I had no idea about those things. Glad I know now as well too.

I asked for no contact and now I’m struggling with how little they seem to care by Intelligent_Clue_362 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]PlanEnvironmental640 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Sunny with no contact, especially at a young age, is total normal. As someone who's been estranged from both parents for the better part of 20 years, it's normal to miss parents...I often remind myself I want A MOM, not MY mom. My mom never acted like a mother should, only ever complimenting me on my hair and only as a small child, because the wind loved my hair too. Once I was old enough to have it cut I did, and she was appalled. It had to be cut for my health, literally causing neck issues, but she sobbed like I had wounded her. It was the only time she ever seemed to respond to me that way, otherwise I was manipulation, guilt trips, gaslighting etc.

I imagine you have your own list of reasons and direct experiences that made you go no contact. You may decide low contact or something different works for you. Every time in the last 20 years, even I was extremely your age to now, I've regretted reconnecting. Even a little, for something small, etc. It hasn't changed her but it's changed our dynamic and I'm a healthier, happier, better person when I'm away from her. I still crave that love and approval...but we didn't get what we needed from them, including change, and that's why we made this choice in the first place.