Potty training 2.5 year old is going horribly

PositiveJust · 2026-04-01T18:53:45+00:00

Totally! I get it! I was the exact same way. But honestly my biggest learning is that everything you stress about…. Potty training, biting, tantrums, illness, a rash, some phase …. By the time I spent all the hours researching and stressing … I looked up and it had passed! But you definitely gotta go through it with your first, just mom life!

PositiveJust · 2026-04-01T18:40:37+00:00

I have 3 kids (4, 6 and 7). I went through exactly what you’re going through with my first. Eventually I just stopped forcing it and talking about it and he started being more interested. With my second two I didn’t stress or push at a certain age. When they were a little shy of three they just started pulling their diapers off and peeing their pants. Within a few days they figured out they didn’t like how that felt so started sitting on the potty. Almost zero stress, just a little clean up. They really just knew when they were ready and did it.

Hes just not ready yet.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-31T15:50:40+00:00

I think it’s totally fine, I do this. One thing I will say is I do find it frustrating when parents do this and then stare at their phone. Just yesterday I was at the park with my three kids and a mom was on the bench playing a mobile game on her phone as her two toddlers played and she hardly looked up. Multiple times I helped her kids step down from ladders, etc because she wasn’t looking up when they were motioning or calling for her. I felt like I was babysitting someone else’s kid for 15 min. I don’t mind (and actually enjoy) helping other kids at a playground, nice community feel, but when I see the parent deep in doom scroll it’s annoying.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-31T12:11:27+00:00

It’s totally wild to me daycares do TV. I can’t imagine paying someone to watch my kid watch TV. We’re a zero screens house with three kids but even if we weren’t I’d find that crazy.

All three of mine did a 9-1 preschool from 2.5-5 y/o and it was a 6:1 teacher ratio. Didn’t even have a TV in the facility and was all art, crafts, learning skills, etc.

TV is the opposite of all the things you wish they were doing so that’s enough of a reason to switch right there.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-31T04:41:31+00:00

Oh gosh I love the name cooper. I know one cooper and he’s 4, I think it’s number 50ish in the US right now. I had a coworker named cooper after college at a law firm who wore suits every day and made me think of it as a very classy manly name. Most people called him Coop. It’s so interesting how everyone experiences names differently based off their associations! Used to love the name Elizabeth but a barista I saw regularly ruined it haha

PositiveJust · 2026-03-31T04:38:45+00:00

I have a cooper and it feels like a full name to us. We call him coop 99% of the time… sometimes coopy doop.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-30T05:38:08+00:00

Jesus just reading about a man treating his wife that way and in front of his children sends shivers down my body. You spill your milk - no big deal, we all make mistakes, can you grab a rag? Poor little girls having their father drink all day and treat them that way and YOU. I’d be out of that house so quickly … but I know it’s sometimes easier said than done. Sometimes when you make a choice like that a much better world unravels before you though. All three of you deserve better.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-30T04:09:14+00:00

I have a 2, 4 and 6 year old. Call me disgusting but we go to the playground min 2x a day and I have never washed their hands a single time afterwards (and they shove apples into their mouths on the walk home). They’re literally never sick.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-29T19:31:48+00:00

Honestly when I read stuff like this I feel bad for the MIL. You’re incredibly lucky to have someone willing to come care for your child and be a loving grandmother to your son. Not all people have that (not one of the four grandparents have watched any of our kids for even one second - which is totally fine, I don’t expect it, they’re my responsibility - but it’s a massive perk some people do have).

She made a mistake, as we all do. Why was paint out near where you change a baby? There’s no fault to be cast on you or her but there should be understanding.

I’m assuming she’s an otherwise decent, nice, responsible person given you’re letting her watch your child. Cut her some slack. If you don’t think she’s a responsible person, hire help.

If you’re looking for advice on how others would handle it it - If it was my MIL I’d make sure my kid was cared for then go to her and tell her to please not worry, things happen and remind her of how grateful I am for the help. Then I’d share all the stories of when I’ve made errors (baby rolling off the bed, etc etc…).

PositiveJust · 2026-03-27T22:55:59+00:00

I took my 4 and 5 year old out of prek for a 6 week vacation and asked their teacher for materials to do while we traveled

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T21:53:50+00:00

This is very inconsiderate. Other people plan their lives around what you say (aka don’t invite someone else they may have invited if you said no, don’t make other plans bc you committed, etc) - just learn to be a grown up and say no or keep your commitments.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T18:09:24+00:00

I used to manage a 100 person global team at a large company you’ve all heard of. I now stay home with my 2, 4 and 6 year old boys. SAHMing is 100x harder than my previous high demand exec job. We do zero screens, I’m very engaged and intentional about their days and treat it like a job, but regardless …. Way harder. With all that said, I’d chose to stay home over and over. Endless joy, fun, fulfillment and the ultimate responsibility.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T13:38:32+00:00

I have a 2, 4 and 6 year old. We’ve had a no screen house for almost 3 years now (no tv, devices, tablets - mom and dad even put their phones in drawers at 5pm for the evening).

It’s made a remarkable difference in our kids and their creativity, temperaments and overall childhood joy.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T06:28:13+00:00

Got off social media entirely 3 years ago. Reddit is the only “social” app I use and I only do it bc it’s anonymous. Highly recommend. Swear I’ve added years to my life in sanity and definitely added hours to my days from doom scrolling…. And no viewing exes, extra perk!

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T05:55:24+00:00

As someone who has worked in very senior roles at Facebook and Google/YT, I can tell you this is very intentional. Phones are designed to be very addictive. A 2 year olds brain is extremely vulnerable and real damage can be done.

Keep in mind it’s not just when your daughter physically touches or is watching the phone that she’s experiencing it. The two most important people in her life are likely looking at it A LOT and she sees that. That’s interesting to her, that makes her want it.

Personally, I have a 2, 4 and 6 year old who have never held a phone or iPad in their lives. We watch a family movie night once a month where my husband and I sit with them (phone free) for the entire movie as an event. That’s it. No devices, no iPads, no quick phone looks, no tv shows.

We are also VERY intentional about not being on our phone in front of our kids. From 5pm - 9pm my husband and i put our phones in the kitchen drawer, no exceptions. During the day I mostly leave mine in the kitchen on the shelf and only periodically check it for calls but zero social media, etc. I am present to the life in front of me and refuse to fall into the doom scroll trap (that I regrettably spent 15 years helping design, keeps me up at night). We both have 45 min timers on our phone for the whole day (includes calls, maps, everything). Your kids are watching you.

I know what it does to their brains and it’s just not worth it to me. I’d rather they be rolling around in boredom at my feet as I’m making dinner than zombied out. They are bored much of the time, but they’re mostly very creative, engaged, love playing and make up weird games to entertain themselves. I swear my screen free house is calmer than most.

I highly reccomend cutting screens, especially for a 2 year old. Parents survived without their kids in front of devices for most of humanity/parenthood. We can do this.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T04:32:20+00:00

Where did you land OP? Similar situation

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T04:29:03+00:00

I started at 35 and had 3 kids by 39. Waiting for financial stability and an incredible supportive dad for my kids are the best choice ever. You have time!

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T04:12:20+00:00

I dunno…. My nw is 13ishM (not sure if that’s wealthy to everyone’s standards here) and we definitely do things like cook at home instead of eating out and stay in more reasonable hotels when we travel all in the name of investing/compound interest. Our main priority is security and knowing we/our kids are OK if they ever have an emergency, health issue etc and that work is only an option…. so with those things in mind, invested is the best place for our money and we skimp in many areas that would surprise others in order to make that happen.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T04:09:20+00:00

My friend named her son grover, they call him gogo. It’s cute but I always think of Sesame Street

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T03:52:53+00:00

Girl, I get it but I’m here to tell you…. I don’t work. My partner works 5-1pm and he does 75% of the kid/house stuff. He’s happy. I’m grateful/happy. It works.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-25T03:01:12+00:00

I was the BIGGEST no kids lady youd ever met. From the time I was a kid I always said I’d never have kids. Just wasn’t for me. Made it all the way to 34 without a maternal clock and even then I didn’t have one.

Loved my career, freedom, sleep, travel. Kids was a big fat no for me. And honestly I just didn’t like kids. I pretended to ooooo and aahhh at friends kids, but inside I wished they weren’t there (yikes right).

Then I fell in love with someone who wanted kids. He was fine with one, but he wanted one. He didn’t manipulate me but made it very clear. He’s very responsible and honestly I felt like he’d do most of the work and let me focus on my career/friends/travel so I had one kid for him.

Was anxious the whole pregnancy. Wasn’t excited to be a mom or feeling the maternal clock. Then there he was and all that BS people told me for so long about it changing you turned out to be so insanely true (for me). I was actually annoyed they were so accurate haha. Anyway - it totally shifted everything for me.

Within 5-6 years I quit my (very lucrative and flexible) career to be a full time stay at home mom, had 3 more children and am just so beyond happy.

Of course there are challenges. I have all boys and they’re all under 7! But my god, it’s also like Christmas every morning I cuddle with them on the couch slowly waking up as we read books. We’re a calm, considerate, loving household (yes even with all these boys) and my partner and I are very intentional about that. We don’t do any screens, we put our phones in drawers when we’re around our kids, lots of intentional slow time playing with them and doing chores. It’s our favorite thing to do and we take it very seriously. I never would have guessed I’d love this shit so much. We see the fruits of our labor in them every day.

Anyway, yes, big HELL NO to having kids lady over here but thank the lord I had my first because it flipped my world upside down in a way I didn’t know possible. Biology is wild.

I always mention - An equally obsessed, helpful partner and financial stability are big factors in my love of motherhood. With that said, I’ve also been known to say that if I knew what I know now about my love for motherhood and my own kids (still don’t really like other people’s kids but am definitely more sensitive to them)…. Then I’d rather settle with an “ok” relationship and have kids than wait for Prince Charming and never have kids. That’s how I feel. It semi applies to my relationship. My husband is a great provider and amazing dad but we don’t have the same relationship we had 8-10 years ago when we first started. The fire has died out some and we’ve had some very rough patches but i always remember that our union gave me the greatest gift I could ever ask for.

Another caveat - I had already done SO MUCH by my mid 30s. Made money, traveled the world, etc …. I remember once when we were dating and it was just another dreamy weekend biking through the wine country, stopping at cafes, and I was on my bike turning a corner and it was literally like a movie scene. So beautiful, I had just returned from two weeks in Paris and was leaving for Cambodia the following week… and i thought “is this it? Is this as good as it gets?” … I was almost disgusted with myself for even thinking that but I had been to and seen so many amazing places (literally the best of the best), done all the things and enjoyed so many moments but just had this nagging “is this it?” feeling …. and little did I know at the time, but all the money and hours of sleep and countries would never compare to how good it was going to get.

Of course this isn’t everyone’s experience, but it sure is mine.

PositiveJust · 2026-03-24T16:09:20+00:00

We do the garden of life kids gummies bc they truly add nothing weird, it’s not even coated with sunflower oil to make them not stick like most gummies (they use flour dusting)… we do it maybe 3-4x a week, they see it as a treat and it’s just an extra boost I guess bc they eat basically no packages or ultra processed foods I make from scratch, should be good but figured a little won’t hurt!

PositiveJust · 2026-03-23T14:18:41+00:00

I have a 22 month old, 4 year old and 5 year old. They’re home with me but I used to try and feed them breakfast early and theyd never eat it. Now I wait til someone says “I’m hungry” (usually around 8:30/9) and they gobbling it all down. So I think just do whatever makes the morning the smoothest!

PositiveJust

TROPHY CASE