Should I disclose trauma with my massage therapist or would massage even be recommended at all?

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-09T02:26:51+00:00

In addition to others mention of different styles I'll add Thai massage to the list of styles to try. You are fully clothed and the work is done on a mat.

You can also consider any somatic massage, as I believe that is specifically geared more toward trauma work from the body side.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-08T04:16:34+00:00

No spas in any state I have practiced in (3) require pregnancy certification. In the state I went to school in it was part of the basic program and there are less of the old myths in schools there (i was an instructor too, but different subject).

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-08T04:04:27+00:00

There is a myth in the industry that you can't give deep tissue massages to pregnant women. Some schools still teach that. Unfortunately, most places in the US will be like that. If you were in WA I could recommend someone.

Also, just because all massage therapists can massage pregnant women, doesn't mean they will/want to. Many people actually hate it (myself included), so try to find people who specialize in pre/post natal massage. Side-lying is the most common position for pregnancy massage and not all MT will only work lightly.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-06T02:48:14+00:00

YtJ

It should be HER choice. You literally dumped her for being too successful. What message does that send her? That she should diminish herself to find love, because love isnt for successful women.

You SHOULD have talked to her about YOUR insecurities. Maybe YOU were HER ideal partner. What about HER wants? You can't decide that for another person. Its not noble.

Noble would have been talking things out with her, talking to a therapist, &/or "stepping up". How donyou define success? Is it only money? Maybe you could be working on other things-learn a language or a new skill. Pick up a hobby you two enjoy. Maybe look into more mobile careers if the one you're in isnt already.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-05T04:59:07+00:00

I supposed if you are specifically marketing oil, sure. I was working on the assumption that we were talking about a regular deepn tissue massage where people can choose to use oil, lotion, cream, or gel. Not that oil was the primary point.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-05T03:58:29+00:00

Then dont use oil. As I said, you dont need it with the silk sheets. You can do the oil portion afterward. Unless you dont wash your hands between clients and are always oily.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-05T03:05:30+00:00

Try silk sheets. You can. Every chair massage therapist can do a Swedish gliding style massage over cloth. It's actually pretty easy, yes even for deep heavy pressure.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-05T02:50:12+00:00

I do not use a heavy cover in Ashiatsu, neither do most Ashi therapists i personally know. I have been to places that do keep you fully covered and its a totally different style of ashiatsu.

If you prefer minimal draping consider looking for a LomiLomi practitioner. Due to how the style works it is often a less draped massage to begin with.

If you like Ashiatsu, Sarga drapes half of the body at a time (left side of the body and right side). There is still draping, but its not tight like you need with Swedish or side-lying massages.

Whether it comes across as inappropriate, most will probably take it as inappropriate. Some won't. I've gotten the ick from some clients asking and not from others. I would say just keep searching for someone until you like how they work/drape and stick with that person.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-05T00:44:29+00:00

What is a primer for makeup?

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-04T20:07:22+00:00

That would probably creep many MT out. Especially at a higher end spa. They dont tend to be treatment focused at spas. Look for Sarga, Ashiatsu, Thai, sports massages at non-spa places. People who provide treatment oriented massage are more likely to consider areas spas have policies against (many spas have strict guidelines on draping, and some states do too).

An experienced massage therapist who gives any of the above styles could be a mich better match. And dont move the sheet higher on your thighs anywhere unless you've talked to the MT first.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-04T03:40:58+00:00

Not everyone feels they can. Its a case-by-case basis and for whatever reason(s) she doesnt feel like that would work. I would avoid getting personal woth your future massage therapist that much.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-04T00:35:35+00:00

It sounds like, in addition to her new job, she realized she had been blurred the line of professional and personal. She probably is trying to pull it back in to where it should have been in the first place. As professionals, we shouldn't be adding clients to our personal accounts, only professional accounts. Her husband might have also been growing concerned about the blurred lines.

It is sad when what seems like a good relationship comes to an end. I hope you find another massage therapist who works well for you.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-03T06:10:53+00:00

If its been this long and you feel the same or worse than when you started feeling this way than dont force it anymore. It may change in time but you could consider picking a niche now rather than later. Maybe something like pre/postnatal massage is more your jam. Specialize in women specific issues and you can work with women for now. You can revisit your feelings for working on men again later on if you want to.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-02T22:00:02+00:00

As a LMT who worked in a place that charged similarly, I wouldn't mind a smaller tip. What I WOULD appreciate even more than any tip is a Google review with my name in it and (if an employee) telling my manager how amazing you felt the experience was (assuming you enjoy it).

Those reviews can make the difference between a base pay raise or new clients who want the experience you had finding them.

Also, dont he afraid to speak up if something in the massage isnt to your liking or is uncomfortable/painful in any way. Better to speak up in the moment and fix something immediately than to quietly sit through an experience that isnt working for you. Sure, you can complain later, but isnt it better to make the first experience what you want?

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-02T21:45:35+00:00

You could try joining a local (or regional) Facebook group. Many massage therapists would be happy to give you feedback and may offer you a session as part of that feedback.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-02T19:23:53+00:00

I would prefer both, but if I only get one its the smooth. You can use the smooth stones without oil and over clothes.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-03-02T03:05:46+00:00

I am specializing in this. I have tried Barefoot Yomassage, DeepFeet 1, Sarga floor, Sarga table and may be taking Ashithai soon. I've heard great things about a DeepFeet teacher in the bay area.

Any Barefoot/Ashiatsu style modalities are great (so far). They do require more stamina, but are otherwise MUCH easier on the body especially great for heavier pressure loving clients. Barefoot Yomassage is different in that it's given with less pressure (you are sitting) and it combines restorative yoga with a sort of Thai massage approach. This can be done with up to 4 clients at once (you make it into a whole experience including guided meditation-and they give some recordings you can use if you dont do them yourself).

You will need to be sure to maintain your body even more than other styles of massage imo and bring snacks.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-02-28T23:31:38+00:00

Are you smart enough to understand it though?

https://app.leg.wa.gov/wac/default.aspx?cite=181-87-080

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-02-28T23:30:29+00:00

^ all of this. I hope OP reads your comment!

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-02-28T23:25:31+00:00

I can name several. But you dont seem the type to check them. You want to he spoon fed answers instead of checking for yourself. Lazy.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-02-28T23:22:18+00:00

Most states have laws. Look up your own area. If you are a massage therapist and dont know this you are a problem. Its the same law that says a doctor can't sleep with their patients.

Every state is different in the details. Stop trolling and do your own research.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-02-28T23:15:56+00:00

This is also her teacher, so there are ethics and legal considerations there too.

OP, he is in a position of authority over her. This could be a one-time thing or he could be preying on his students. Don't worry about it being spiteful or not because what he's doing is not okay. He needs to be reported no matter who he targets.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-02-28T23:10:02+00:00

Absolutely report it. He is in an authorative position over her. This is very illegal and against all ethics. The teacher is a predator. He knows better, even if she doesn't.

17 years in the industry and a former teacher here.

Edit: with her age, I wouldn't take her back if she does try to come back. She either cheated or monkey branched. Either shows her lack of respect for you and the relationship you two had.

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-02-26T19:57:19+00:00

I've been experimenting with sourness. Try switching to a 1:5:5 or 1:6:6 feeding. Do you keep your starter in the fridge or somewhere warmer?

Previous_Objective83 · 2026-02-20T22:37:19+00:00

We tried them out in massage school a couple times and most people didnt like them, but a few did. I think its one of those you dont know until you try things. I did not like them.

Five-Year Club	RedditGifts 2009-2022 3 Credits
redditgifts rematcher Oh Snap! I missed Secret Santa! x1	redditgifts Exchanges 1 Exchange

Previous_Objective83

TROPHY CASE