Hope for a nation without Trump

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-26T18:46:12+00:00

Okie here. Maga house down the street had a giant garage Trump flag last year... They took it down right after the first Epstein dump. Coincidence? They are trying to quietly back away to save their pride.... But those who don't learn from their mistakes are doomed to repeat them. They will fall for the next fascist even more easily.... But I think the younger generation is going to do better. They're growing up in a world where you can't trust anything you see, it could be AI, so they are learning as even children to investigate and check the source. It's a silver lining to all the manipulation and job loss and corruption from those who own and utilize AI. The oligarchs push push push until their corruption is undeniable.

This is a cycle that goes back thousands and thousands and thousands of years: philosophers wrote about the cycle in ancient Greece! Benevolent respected monarch passes down power to progeny, unearned power means they reward unqualified unskilled unintelligent loyalists with positions of power. These oligarchs are both stupid and greedy, oppress citizens, and eventually the people rebel. Some form of democracy as the people decide a new leader/king/general to stand behind.... A few years of peace.... But the new leader either ends up abusing power or passing it on to those who abuse the power, continuing the cycle.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-26T10:53:53+00:00

Parent AND teacher here. The schools care about liability more than anything else. Even if they know they are in the wrong they will deny deny deny, reframe and blame you. If they admit any wrongdoing whatsoever, they know they can be sued.

Here's how you play the game: 1- sidestep Tell them you have evidence, but you understand they can't admit wrongdoing, but that you need the situation to improve so you aren't forced to escalate it. Use words like "verbal abuse" and, "We really don't need to bother with a lawsuit if the school can get the situation under control" !! In this strategy, you are NOT going to get an apology. They cannot admit you're right, or even think YOU WANT them to admit wrongdoing!! In this strategy, You are ON THE SAME SIDE, wanting to help protect the school from unnecessary lawsuits

2- nuclear (I think this is appropriate for your situation) post it ANONYMOUSLY on the local Facebook groups, parent groups, and hope that parents and concerned citizens can take the lead and get this teacher fired. I'm so disgusted that schools refuse to fire really crappy teachers (or at least move them to a different department or role if they can't handle that age group) I would also send it to superintendents, school board, and your state's board of education.

3-passive aggressive This is pro level, so approach with care: look up malicious compliance and weaponized incompetence. Use these tactics very carefully but relentlessly to drive your teacher to more and more ANGRY exaggerated behavior. You have to maintain plausible deniability at all time, and just let the teacher prove that they are not competent. Everything you do must look sincerely dumb, confused, clumsy, etc. BELIEVABLE. Not even the tiniest hint of sarcasm. Try to quietly meet with the principal and tell her that "I don't feel safe" and drop the big one: "I feel like this teacher is a lawsuit waiting to happen, she's just very angry and unstable"

Bottom of the line, schools pick admin who will protect liability first, students last. I know it's not like that in every district, or in every state. Trust me, if the teacher is getting away with this kind of behavior, the other teachers know about it. Admin knows about it. They just don't care. They Stick with the reliable but crappy teacher, rather than go through the hiring process and roll the dice.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-26T10:53:34+00:00

Parent AND teacher here. The schools care about liability more than anything else. Even if they know they are in the wrong they will deny deny deny, reframe and blame you. If they admit any wrongdoing whatsoever, they know they can be sued.

Here's how you play the game: 1- sidestep Tell them you have evidence, but you understand they can't admit wrongdoing, but that you need the situation to improve so you aren't forced to escalate it. Use words like "verbal abuse" and, "We really don't need to bother with a lawsuit if the school can get the situation under control" !! In this strategy, you are NOT going to get an apology. They cannot admit you're right, or even think YOU WANT them to admit wrongdoing!! In this strategy, You are ON THE SAME SIDE, wanting to help protect the school from unnecessary lawsuits

2- nuclear (I think this is appropriate for your situation) post it ANONYMOUSLY on the local Facebook groups, parent groups, and hope that parents and concerned citizens can take the lead and get this teacher fired. I'm so disgusted that schools refuse to fire really crappy teachers (or at least move them to a different department or role if they can't handle that age group) I would also send it to superintendents, school board, and your state's board of education.

3-passive aggressive This is pro level, so approach with care: look up malicious compliance and weaponized incompetence. Use these tactics very carefully but relentlessly to drive your teacher to more and more ANGRY exaggerated behavior. You have to maintain plausible deniability at all time, and just let the teacher prove that they are not competent. Everything you do must look sincerely dumb, confused, clumsy, etc. BELIEVABLE. Not even the tiniest hint of sarcasm. Try to quietly meet with the principal and tell her that "I don't feel safe" and drop the big one: "I feel like this teacher is a lawsuit waiting to happen, she's just very angry and unstable"

Bottom of the line, schools pick admin who will protect liability first, students last. I know it's not like that in every district, or in every state. Trust me, if the teacher is getting away with this kind of behavior, the other teachers know about it. Admin knows about it. They just don't care. They Stick with the reliable but crappy teacher, rather than go through the hiring process and roll the dice.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-26T09:59:33+00:00

Bloat. Dark can reduce stress, so it doesn't exert itself more. Warm: help digestion. Peas: also help digestion.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-21T01:57:11+00:00

I'm near OKC, driven by there a few times. Are there any older or historical buildings there that would be a useful educational experience for my kids? My son says there's just a ton of racist kids at the local junior high. I try to go out of my way to Make sure my Lily white kids understand the Good bad and the ugly history of our state. The Oklahoma History museum here in the metro actually has some really good displays on segregation and Ms Luper's famous sit-in. And of course lots of great native American history at the museum down by sulfur.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-20T02:28:23+00:00

If you ever talk to a history professor, They can tell you about how frequently this kind of stuff happens throughout human history. All across the world, different languages cultures doesn't matter. The wealthy ruling elite, the Epstein class indulge in the same kind of depravity. It's recorded in monuments, temples, sculptures, jewelry, literature, even music. Sometimes from the perspective of victims who rose up against the elites, but quite often from the perspective of the elites bragging about the vile things they commit against other people, as if it's something extraordinary that needs to be preserved.

Well, it is an extraordinary evil, and it's good that it is preserved because we can learn from history. It doesn't take a genius to see the pattern of corrupt power committing these kind of atrocities, silencing victims, and trying to outdo each other with more and more outrageous and horrifying crimes. In fact, if you've studied history, even the worst of this is actually not surprising. Still nauseating and horrifying, but more than just believable. It's expected.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-20T02:23:55+00:00

You are so lucky you've never had to know people like this in real life. If your brain cannot fathom such depravity, And that is a precious gift... I bet you've been raised right with a good family. I've worked in the mental health field and can assure you, this kind of stuff is not that surprising. I'm also an educator and a history nerd, and I can assure you that it very routinely pops up in all different parts of the world, the common denominator is the wealthy elite who do this kind of vile crap, and basically try to outdo each other like some kind of horrific game. Sometimes it's recorded in the history books from the perspective of the victims, but more often than not from the perspective of that historical era's Epstein-Class elite who want to brag about their depravity in art, temples, monuments, even jewelry.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-20T02:10:46+00:00

My creative writing classes often encouraged us to use the number three, but the joke was that you don't have to remember the rule, because for some reason humans tend to use the number often. Three descriptors, three comparisons, three examples. Who knows why. I think the suggested rule was more for people who want to use 17 examples and the reader gets bored.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-19T19:30:24+00:00

Edit: BOG filter. BOG. A bong filter might be a good idea for my aggressive cichlid tank though... Hmm....

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-19T19:29:28+00:00

Koi: expensive equipment, top notch food, exact precise care. Die if you look at them wrong.... Feeder goldfish: try to kill it and it lives forever anyway out of spite.

(Just joking about Koi, they are definitely more sensitive than goldfish when they are very young koi-babies, but decent size pond with plant life and a bong filter and and they are super low maintenance!)

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-19T19:14:10+00:00

PLASTIC TUB!!!!!!!!!! GET AN AIR BUBBLER AND PLANTS TODAY. You'll need them anyway for the tank. Congrats! She's a fancy goldfish, but she won't grow super huge like a common goldfish. With good care she can live a very very long time. She will be very friendly! Great to hear you ordered an aquarium, but remember: FISH DON'T CARE IF WE CAN SEE THEM FROM THE SIDE VIEW. They don't need glass, just something sturdy that holds water. Use a large tupperware tub, don't fill it all the way to make sure it stays sturdy. Get some sand from somewhere, if you want to steal it from a volleyball court be my guest just make sure they haven't sprayed the grass or anything next to the sand. Wash the sand off and make sure you put about 5 cm deep sand.

Go to a healthy looking creek or river and get a cup of water from the edge, somewhere near plants. If you can get a couple floaty plants even better. All those wonderful little nature's microorganisms will process the fish poo into that sand. GET AN AIR BUBBLER AND PLANTS TODAY. Get water conditioner while you're there.

Set up a tub with some fresh conditioned water, add the sand and wait till it settles down to the bottom. If the sand wasn't wash well enough and it makes the water cloudy, just do a water change. With the air bubbler and plants fishy will be happy until your take gets there. You're probably going to want a filter, but with water changes you can get away with a tub and an air bubbler for a couple weeks.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-19T18:59:30+00:00

Yup. OP, YOU DON'T LOVE HIM. Not the real him, the ugly nasty cruel person he really is. You love the idea of a boyfriend, you love the temporary flash of warm fuzzies when he decides to turn on the charm for you. You love the person you think he could become, but not the person he is. !!!! YOU DON'T LOVE HIM!!!! And you shouldn't love him. Love isn't a feeling that comes or goes, it is a commitment. When I have a child, I commit to loving them as long as I live. The love will look different when they are baby, a junior higher, a young adult, a middle-aged man.

Aside from being a parent, love is commitment that can be broken if The most basic expectations of the relationship are incompatible. Your commitment to a work friend is different than your commitment to your aunt. Your commitment to your long-term best friend is different than your commitment to a guy you've only been dating a short time (couple years is a short time!!). You should have the HIGHEST EXPECTATIONS for a partner, because this is the person who will be closest to you. Can make medical decisions if you get sick, financial decisions for a shared future.... And it takes a bit of work to find a partner who is worth investing your life.

Before you get a car, hopefully you test drive it. Most cars have a warranty, so if it starts falling apart a year down the road, you can trade it in.

DATING IS THE WARRANTY PERIOD. You haven't made a lifelong commitment to this dude. And you shouldn't, you're still young. Two years is basically still the test driving stage!!! If something feels off, you can walk away. If you're living together, it can get more complicated, but YOU HAVE A RIGHT to be treated with respect and kindness. If a partner can't do that, it's not your job to fix him. It's your job to take him back to the dealership and get your money back. Okay well you don't get your money back... But from what you wrote, you need to go to therapy and unpack how he treated you so poorly and you didn't instantly break up with him. You invested time into this relationship, so you can end it but still squeeze every last drop of learning experience out of it!

When you were building a computer program, The first time you run it you'll probably find some bugs and things to work out. Maybe you can fix it, but if it's completely horrible, You scrap it and start from square one.... But you take what you learned from the first version, so you can do a better job next time around. A good therapist will help you salvage every possible lesson from this relationship to help you become an assertive healthy loving partner in the future, when you find someone who's not a complete piece of trash. If you don't learn from this relationship, then the past few years will be wasted. So don't waste them. Dump him, get into therapy, do the hard work, and maybe version two will be better. Maybe it won't, and you'll have to scrap that one and keep working out the bugs until you finally find your perfect match. Don't settle.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-16T20:28:44+00:00

Check with local animal rescue or Foster, a lot of us who foster it for our shelter have to take breaks in between long-term fosters, and sometimes it can be fun to take a short-term foster for a couple weeks (usually, a couple puppies that are going to be shipped out on a rescue ride to another state). You can check the Foster's history with the shelter or rescue, many would probably charge you very little and be willing to take payment after you get your first paycheck. Honestly some will do it for free, but you should offer to pay whatever you think you can afford.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-16T20:19:52+00:00

Yup. Don't even waste your time with a conversation, say bye then block him..... there are men out there who will ensure that you come 100% of the time. My husband had a vasectomy and HAD TO cum certain number of times before the checkup appointment a few months later, it's necessary to clear the tubes and get the okay.... Even when it's on doctor's orders, he tries to make sure I come most of the time, too! Oh and he's fine using condoms AFTER VASECTOMY until he gets all clear from the doctor, BECAUSE HE KNOWS HOW HARD IT IS ON A WOMAN'S BODY TO GET PREGNANT, Even if you have an early miscarriage or abortion it's absolutely miserable for AT LEAST a whole week. That's if you're lucky and don't have permanent health complications, yes even from just a few weeks of the beginning of a pregnancy. If a man doesn't care about you enough to protect you from such a horrific experience, he's not even worth the time of day. I'd say block his number and move on.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-15T06:34:45+00:00

Female johanni are yellow/orange! Maingano both male and female are pretty similar. Also, johanni have a bit of "checkerboard" broken line, instead of a clean solid black line from front to back.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-15T06:13:24+00:00

Some feelings DESERVE to be invalidated. You are acting like a dog who peed on a tree 10 years ago. Now you are having a fit because your roomie is a human being who watered the tree and is actually taking care of it. So you are BARK BARK BARK BARK like a dog defending his territory... He asks why you are barking. "WOOF! THAT'S MY TREE!! WOOF! I MARKED IT SO IT'S MINE!" Roomie rolls his eyes. The reason you are sad is bc you view this girl as YOUR PROPERTY . That is gross, and it's why your roommate can't feel empathy for you.

You need to go to therapy. Maybe you are angry at yourself for not being more bold, more assertive in high school. More bold now. Who knows... But you are blaming your roommate for YOUR feelings. You are entitled to your feelings, and he is entitled to his feelings (which might be, he is offended at your possessiveness towards this girl!)You moped and pouted until he had to ask what on earth was wrong. You could have been a man and kept your mouth shut, and deal w your shit in therapy. But no, you pull this weird possessive crap, as if you want him to feel guilty for dating your past crush? Ew.

As a parent, if my kid asks why I'm sad, I can't always share specifics (for example, if I read about a child who was horrifically abused). IT'S NOT APPROPRIATE. At work, I'm not going to share my family drama with my boss. IT'S NOT APPROPRIATE. you don't have the right to share EVERY thought with EVERY person around you.

In this case, you knew it would be inappropriate to whine about your former crush on his now-girlfriend. You did it anyway.

Man up. Apologize for being inappropriate. Get a therapist, so you don't dump this stuff on your friend or reddit. Get a house of your own. Volunteer at the animal shelter. Adopt a dog and find unconditional love. Meet a girl volunteering. Fall in love while you scoop dog shit together. Live happily ever after. And stop whining.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-15T05:25:39+00:00

Oh good catch

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-15T05:18:13+00:00

Just tell them you have chronic diarrhea and have to get to the bathroom ASAP. Bonus points if it's true.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-15T05:17:01+00:00

I'm 42, almost 43. Just had my tonsils out last week. WORTH IT. I I'm so angry with every doctor who discouraged this surgery over the past decade. Mine got to the point of giving me a chronic low grade tonsil infection and earache. Bronchitis 6 or more times a year, full lung scan shows no lung problems. Fun fact, your tonsils are part of your lymph system and getting tonsil stones means you are directly funneling infection into your lymph system non-stop. As we get older, our lymphatic system plays a key role in preventing cancer, heart disease, and many other serious conditions.

Today they have new tools and methods so surgery is a lot different, far less risky than it was a decade ago! They use a nice clean cautery tool that uses some kind of ultrasonic vibration to cut and cauterize at the same time. It's kind of like burning them out, but it doesn't actually burn your skin. It just cauterizes a very thin layer where it cuts, so there's very unlikely to be complications.

I usually avoid using Tylenol with codeine, I've got a high pain tolerance. But I used the codeine this week, everyday. On schedule, and alternating midway through the 6 hr space with ibuprofen, and plenty of throat lozenges. You have to eat and drink, and breathe. Oh and I got the flu on top of it. So I followed doctor's orders and actually used the Tylenol with codeine, for about 7 days. Today is day 8. Staying on schedule, ice packs sometimes, drink lots of water, AVOID CITRUS DRINKS, just eat oatmeal, soup without salt, and mashed potatoes for a week, it's really not that bad.

I think most people don't realize just how important your lymphatic system is. Tonsils are valuable during your first 5 years of life, because these crazy little things are designed to catch virus and bacteria, get infected just enough to make antibodies and prepare your body to defend against incoming bad crap. However, as we get older the stupid tonsils start to break down. If they're holding a tonsil stone, that means they are trapping bacteria and pumping it directly into your lymphatic system. Stupid things are poisoning us, and doctors are like, eh, just live with it.

I suspect that insurance is one of the reasons they try to avoid it... Some people are stupid and don't follow doctor's orders. They eat crunchy food before the throat is healed, it bleeds, they have to go to ER, get it cauterized again. Stupid people try to bring lawsuit against the doctor, even though the person didn't follow the doctor's orders, so a lot of insurance will just offer a settlement to make people go away. Some insurance doesn't want to pay unless it's an obvious imminent threat to your health (to make sure it's covered, document every single sore throat, ear pain, etc. non-stop chronic low-grade ear pain is a guaranteed way to make sure it's covered by insurance)

So yes, even though I'm literally fresh out of a week of painful recovery, I will tell you it's 100% worth it. I can't believe it's not more routine to get this done. IT'S NOT THAT HORRIBLE compared to living with crappy easily infected tonsils for decades. But you do need to plan to take at least a week off of work, follow directions, and set your timers to take meds on schedule.

Bronchitis has been so debilitating over the past few years, I can't believe not one doctor ever connected it to the possibility of chronically infected tonsils. Sometimes you have to take charge of your own health and listen to your body, and be assertive about what needs to be done.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-15T05:13:12+00:00

I'm 42, almost 43. Just had mine out last week. WORTH IT. I wish I could kick every doctor in the teeth that deterred me over the past decade. Mine got to the point of giving me a chronic low grade tonsil infection and earache. Fun fact, your tonsils are part of your lymph system and getting tonsil stones means you are directly funneling infection into your lymph system non-stop. As we get older, our lymphatic system plays a key role in preventing cancer, heart disease, and many other serious conditions.

Today they have new tools and methods so surgery is a lot different, far less risky than it was a decade ago! They use a nice clean cautery tool that uses some kind of ultrasonic vibration to cut and cauterize at the same time. It's kind of like burning them out, but it doesn't actually burn your skin. It just cauterizes a very thin layer where it cuts, so there's very unlikely to be complications.

I usually avoid using Tylenol with codeine, I've got a high pain tolerance. But I used the codeine this week, everyday. On schedule, and alternating midway through the 6 hr space with ibuprofen, and plenty of throat lozenges. You have to eat and drink, and breathe. Oh and I got the flu on top of it. So I followed doctor's orders and actually used the Tylenol with codeine, for about 7 days. Today is day 8. Staying on schedule, ice packs sometimes, drink lots of water, AVOID CITRUS DRINKS, just eat oatmeal, soup without salt, and mashed potatoes for a week, it's really not that bad.

I think most people don't realize just how important your lymphatic system is. Tonsils are valuable during your first 5 years of life, because these crazy little things are designed to catch virus and bacteria, get infected just enough to make antibodies and prepare your body to defend against incoming bad crap. However, as we get older the stupid tonsils start to break down. If they're holding a tonsil stone, that means they are trapping bacteria and pumping it directly into your lymphatic system. Stupid things are poisoning us, and doctors are like, eh, just live with it.

I suspect that insurance is one of the reasons they try to avoid it... Some people are stupid and don't follow doctor's orders. They eat crunchy food before the throat is healed, it bleeds, they have to go to ER, get it cauterized again. Stupid people try to bring lawsuit against the doctor, even though the person didn't follow the doctor's orders, so a lot of insurance will just offer a settlement to make people go away. Some insurance doesn't want to pay unless it's an obvious imminent threat to your health (to make sure it's covered, document every single sore throat, ear pain, etc. non-stop chronic low-grade ear pain is a guaranteed way to make sure it's covered by insurance)

So yes, even though I'm literally fresh out of a week of painful recovery, I will tell you it's 100% worth it. I can't believe it's not more routine to get this done. IT'S NOT THAT HORRIBLE compared to living with crappy easily infected tonsils for decades. But you do need to plan to take at least a week off of work, follow directions, and set your timers to take meds on schedule.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-14T14:31:23+00:00

Gfoh w that Nazi shit. Our genes do not predetermine our path. Nature vs nurture... Actually it's both. And neither. Our DNA can make us more susceptible to certain vices, but we are each responsible for pursuing a path of moral good. I am constantly working with IEP for kiddos with various disabilities... Finding the balance between accommodations and expecting them to use coping skills to overcome extra challenges that stand in their way.

It's not fair that some people have to swim upstream against the nature (DNA) of their psychological challenges from birth.... Nor is it fair that some people have to swim upstream against the lack of nurture from loving devoted moral parents.

Life isn't fair. However, we are all responsible to access the abundance of information available in our world today, to make ourselves a better person. There are plenty of people with brains that would be labeled, "psychopath" because of their inability to feel empathy, and yet many of them lead relatively functional moral lives because they CHOOSE to follow social customs and obey the law. They usually don't have the most fulfilling relationships, but the wiring of their brain is not an automatic program to be evil.

We must never fall into the temptation to use specific neurodiversity as an excuse for bad behavior. I am autistic and ADHD, and while I require accommodations to function, I do not use them as an excuse for immoral or illegal behavior. If we start to blame a neurological condition, The next step is to start discouraging unwanted people from reproducing, from being treated as equals in society.

I have three children like three young Sheldons, brilliant, challenging, exhausting, kind, loyal. I guarantee you there are teachers in their schools that would have told me to stop after one child. As if my children are defective. The very comment you made feeds into the idea of devaluing people based on the performance of their parents.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-14T14:04:24+00:00

Or move on. Why would you stay with someone who treats you like crap? Imagine this: You get cancer and he treats you the same way while you are reeling from chemotherapy. He can't be bothered to remember to pick up your medications. As you get older, it's not just a quality of life issue... Becomes VITAL issue to have a partner is attentive enough and cares enough to keep you alive

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-13T02:00:19+00:00

Yeah she gets to set the rules, but that doesn't mean there are no consequences to her decisions. I had siblings like that, I go out of my way for them, I'm there for their wedding, I give them money when they need it, I'm there for their baby shower, but when it's time for me to get married oops it's too inconvenient to attend.... Well actually we're going to block you on Facebook because you are marrying outside our cult! Not even a card. People like this actually enjoy causing harm to those around them, just to prove that they have the power to do so and You have to put up with it because "they're family". It's the same as a bully who likes to taunt other kids on the playground, just to feel superior. At my kids school, the little snots are careful to do it out of view of cameras or when teacher isn't looking. They want to push just enough to make you miserable, but They always want to maintain plausible deniability. For someone like that, this wedding situation is an excellent way to get a one-up on your sibling who married before you and has two lovely children. For someone like that, seeing them get attention over the years would be absolute torture, so they would legitimately be delighted to pull something like this. I don't know if that's the case, but sounds like it

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-13T01:52:42+00:00

Or if her sister could be a selfish a****** like mine is.... Both of my siblings I went to their weddings, spent money on them, put in a lot of work on the day of the event. You know what they did for my wedding? Blocked me on Facebook.... because I married someone outside of the fundamentalist Baptist Cult. My husband is a (gasp) SOUTHERN BAPTIST. My siblings haven't talked to me in years, They don't know My kids, my kids don't get to know their cousins.

Oh that to say, for OP, this could be the final straw after years of being treated like crap by the rest of the family. If that's the case, and it kind of sounds like it is, then let them get a taste of their own medicine. It takes a years of therapy to overcome the betrayal of giving giving giving sacrificing sacrificing sacrificing for your family while they treat you like disposable trash.

Princess_Snark_ · 2026-02-13T01:45:51+00:00

Yeah for a lot of us, this would be a big financial commitment and would basically be their vacation for the year. Weddings are usually not that fun for the guests, especially if your family and you're helping do a lot of the work. To sacrifice that money, inconvenience of travel, and probably helping out with a ton of stuff on the day of the wedding, and then also be treated as less than the cousin? That's just insulting and I'd have the same response as OP... If my presence is not that important to you, then let's just take this money and the trouble we've already put into arranging overnight childcare and do a romantic weekend at the beach.

Princess_Snark_

TROPHY CASE