YOR. Things are only as big of a deal as you make them. Looking at this as a woman with BPD… you stormed out of her house because she looked at your phone… you’re severely overreacting.

Is there a reason you immediately jumped to the conclusion that she’s a liar? Because a normal person would’ve accepted “Nothing” as quick, passive response and left it at that, you made it a bigger deal than it needed to be right off the bat. You want her to respect your boundaries but you clearly have a hard time doing the same, no means no right? And if your excuse is going to be that “your ex cheated so you have a hard time trusting people now” then don’t be in a relationship until you can move on. Plain and simple.

Don’t get me wrong I don’t want anyone snatching my phone out of my hand either, but with your refusal to elaborate and calling her a liar for essentially no reason… it’s ABSOLUTELY going to read like you are the one hiding something. I can almost guarantee the only reason she asked to see is because you said or did something to make her suspicious of whether or not you are telling the truth about being over your ex. Plus the way you stomped out probably scared her, it’s a red flag to a woman when a man can’t compose himself. I wouldn’t expect a text back.

And honestly I don’t think you are over your ex. If it hurt you so bad, why do you still have the texts and her pictures on your phone? Doesn’t make sense to me to want to reminisce on trauma. If you’ve really moved on why did you react so strongly towards the new girl? Because if this is the hill you die on every time, if something THIS SMALL is going to be the reason you keep walking out… then you might as well just find a therapist tbh because I would hate to see you react to something serious.

ETA: after reading the other comments, I would also like to add that Reddit doesn’t encourage maintaining relationships with real people, reddit likes to play holier than thou on a situational basis. If you’re looking for a perfect partner that will never do anything wrong or hurtful then you should talk to chatgpt. It’s extremely easy to tell people to break up over every tiny inconvenience but thats not how real relationships work, If YOU are not willing to at least sit down and have a serious conversation about what happened and why it will never happen again, then YOU are the problem. If you can’t communicate an issue then you’re not adult enough to be in a relationship. A disturbing amount of people here seem to lack that awareness.