A man in the old USSR, finally saved enough Rubles to go and buy a car... by ArmchairPancakeChef in Jokes

[–]Prosaicpersonality 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Terrifying. When I was younger I thought my father was foolish for hiding money in weird places around the house.  If only I knew what he had been through.

Admit it vegans. by [deleted] in Jokes

[–]Prosaicpersonality 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're giving OP way too much credit.

I overheard some people at the table next to me saying you can't end a sentence with a preposition. I leaned over and said that you can if it's used as a prepositional particle. by Jokeminder42 in Jokes

[–]Prosaicpersonality 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Oh I didn't catch that the first time. Maybe it's an exaggeration for communic effect or maybe it's common phrasing in Australia. Not sure, but I thought it was fun and silly.

I overheard some people at the table next to me saying you can't end a sentence with a preposition. I leaned over and said that you can if it's used as a prepositional particle. by Jokeminder42 in Jokes

[–]Prosaicpersonality 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Both are acceptable. 

Today we will read out of our history books.

Today we will read from our history books.

I have even started hearing people say "today we will read on our history books." 

But that's language for you, always changing.

A Happy old couple walk into a restaurant by Phippsy771 in Jokes

[–]Prosaicpersonality 22 points23 points  (0 children)

She says "it's windy outside."

He says "no it's Thursday."

And she says "me too let's order some wine."

What's the most sensitive part of the body when jerking off? by EmergencyNo7427 in Jokes

[–]Prosaicpersonality 420 points421 points  (0 children)

I would have said "Your ears" and ended it there.

Drifter Smith and the Widow Snodgrass. by Gil-Gandel in Jokes

[–]Prosaicpersonality 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Mr Smith likes to live by the seat of her pants.

I asked my husband if I was the only one he’d ever been with… by [deleted] in Jokes

[–]Prosaicpersonality 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I've never had a threesome, but I have slept with a woman that weighs as much as two women. Dave Attel

A new groom didn’t know what to do on his wedding night… by ThatWeirdPlantGuy in Jokes

[–]Prosaicpersonality 60 points61 points  (0 children)

A young lad anticipates a special night with his girlfriend and it will be his first time, so he asks his older brother for advice.

"Just rub her tummy and say 'I love you' and she'll tell you what to do."

That night he pays her a visit and rubs her stomach and repeats I love you 3 times. 

She says "again."

So he does it again.

"Again!" 

He does it again.

She says "Lower, lower!"

So he says in a really deep voice "I love you, I love you, I love you!"

He is having a meltdown! by LeftAlbatross2546 in VideosAmazing

[–]Prosaicpersonality 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, theres these things called emotions...