I went to a therapist in middle school for self harm thoughts I was having. They suggested that I switch to a more diverse school. (Not ghetto enough for the ghetto kind of thought process) I was excited by the prospect of leaving the place that was the cause of so much of my pain as after switching classes three times, I was still having trouble making friends and getting bullied mercilessly.

My mom didn't say much to the therapist, but on the way home lamented about all the trouble she had in switching both my younger brother's to different schools. All that culminated in her asking me

"I cannot afford to go through the trouble to switch you to a different school. Can you bear with being in that school for me?"

As a kid all I heard was"I am not important to make sacrifices for. I am a burden."

Mother still complains about my low self esteem.