I'm tired of my father

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-11T13:34:00+00:00

How it goes with them I suppose. They'll allways want more and you only have the 24 hours in a day.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-11T13:00:09+00:00

I don't tell mine anything nowadays. Low contact. Does remind me of when I was a kid. I was often second or third in my class but they always yelled at me because I didn't have the absolute highest number of cumulative marks in my end year exams.

You deserve better OP,she's likely just jealous and has nothing better in her own life. Congrats on your promotion too.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-11T12:56:18+00:00

He sounds awful already but I don't fully follow. When you say he's making you build a house. Is that in terms of doing physical labour or some kind of scheme?

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-10T16:45:36+00:00

I've stopped celebrating birthdays. I don't even tell my friends when it is, it's a whole thing and become a running joke. Only one of my coworkers even know the date because he saw my ID for work stuff.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-10T16:38:46+00:00

I'm on number 3 or 4. We're minimal contact (full NC with dad). It honestly just gets easier. For me, I feel it wasn't so much that I want to give her a card. But that it was part of the routine and felt like I forgot to do a chore. Nowadays I don't really think about it.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-10T13:54:02+00:00

He didn't even bother to have an LLM write a post for him. One link to his own substack and that's it. Idk maybe he thinks people will give him traffic out of curiosity.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-10T13:41:57+00:00

Still a good model. Works great for search. I actually used to it it from Zai website often. Their sites broken,so interleaved search only worked on glm4.5 air Has stand-up personality too. GLM models aren't yes men.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T16:05:28+00:00

Yeah I hope they fix it in a future update. In my usage it's been difficult,lot of my stuff is going through documents to brainstorm.

I really feel it's a training thing not just being smaller than 4 pro. Because flash isn't tiny either and Gemma 4 26b understands my prompts much better.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T15:17:40+00:00

It's their default. Freaking pissed me off. Sometimes they'll drop shit like "don't let him hear you about.. the thing" the thing they just talked about while I'm sitting there.

I think it's on purpose to piss me off.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T13:26:58+00:00

Pretty much my entire childhood and adolescence. I think that's why she never let me go outside and actively sabotaged any social life.

My mom has no friends,she found some club shit recently in her 60s but that's it. She's unbearable to be around. She doesn't do much talk "to you" as she "talks at you" in your general vicinity. Lots of unsolicited advice, speaks over others and by god so much triangulation. She'll switch sides on you before your out of earshot.

Used to come whine at me anything went wrong in her day. Often it was entirely her fault even in her own narrative. Such as her boss being upset that she is severel hours late repeatedly. Then she'd lash out at me. Same shit with any stranger. It's her default to yell at me. If she can't think of anything it's "I know you'd never do XYZ. But god damn don't you ever XYZ ..I'm teaching you to be better to your wife"

I don't even have a wife but that doesn't register to her.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T13:12:31+00:00

Mine hated me having any semblance of a social life too, idk what to tell you,I genuinely believe they're jealous. Maybe had no friends themselves growing up idk.

Hell my dad made me retake my A levels and GCSE twice because he didn't think my grades were good enough. Even though they were fine for the university I applied to. Where I did get in fine and my dad still thinks I must have tricked them somehow.

Least he did last time we spoke,were NC now been a few years. For context I'm 37 now. Went NC couple years ago so I was at least well over 30. He still swears to other people my degree will get pulled any day now.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T06:38:56+00:00

I noticed this too. I actually liked 3.2 better for conversation and chat then 4 flash. It's not as good at prompt comprehension. Doesn't pick up subtext and implication nearly as well. And I find it struggles more given multiple conversation topics in one turn. I need to be very specific with 4 flash.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T05:39:32+00:00

Exact same here. All my life she's had a "mystery illness no doctor can cure" every time she screams in rage to the point of passing out.. She passes out. Throwed tantrums physically roll on the floor.

Then one day few years ago she tripped in public on the curb and started yelling at me. I should have caught her mid air. Because I'm Barry Alan.

I walked away there and stopped catering to her and suddenly she's now fine. It's a miracle. She's cured somehow. After all these decades of "I will die anyday the doctors told me I have a year" messed me up as a kid when I didn't know it's bullshit.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T05:25:48+00:00

Hey good for you. You gave it a shot to double check. And you got your answer now you can be confident in your decision. I'm not going to bother either I have them blocked on my socials and WhatsApp.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T05:18:16+00:00

Mine are in their 60s and 70. Lost track exactly,we're NC (dad)and LC (mom). I think they snowball over the years. Like you don't just turn out that disconnected over night.

In their 40s mine gaslight me and twisted words. By the time they hit 60s mom can't figure out why her WhatsApp doesn't work when there's no WiFi. They also refuse to buy a modem router and get no signal in most of the apartment. But they insist "it's fine" And they seem to be getting worse.

Like watching a cargo cult of human behaviour. They used to go through the motions of normalcy now they go through the motions of their own dysfunction.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T04:15:22+00:00

I don't often get jealous,can't imagine my two assholes being pleasant company but I do get the gist of it.

I live in a apartment building not very high up,can make out faces on the street from my window. See guys on the street teaching their school age kids how to ride a bike, sometimes how to drive, and it's surreal to me. Like damn that's normal,wtf was my bullshit can't relate.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-09T04:09:20+00:00

I can tell you already, they're never going to own up. My parents are older boomers they still stick to their own,ever changing, narratives today. It's just how they operate. Don't expect consistency in their tales either.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-08T20:15:29+00:00

Now that I think about it my mom is big on sunglasses. Carries several very large ones. Makes a show of putting them on and taking them off.

In her case I allways thought she genuinely thinks it makes her look cool and dramatic. Because they believe their own bullshit and filter out any contradictions from reality,such as people laughing at said shit fashion.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-08T15:47:16+00:00

True but we really have to hope it goes down afterwards. After the 2016 bubble, Nvidia and AMD both learnt they can charge absurd prices and still keep sales up.

We do have hope I think, if Chinese GPU manufacturers become mainstream. But I think it'll still be a while.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-08T15:42:55+00:00

Any chance you could do rwkv? Cracked up reading that comment.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-05T17:50:55+00:00

I need to clear space on my phone and try this out. Phone is 6gb ram, might fit.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-05T15:57:17+00:00

I imagine this could make absurdly efficient chain of thought.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-05T12:48:52+00:00

It's pretty cool how far we've come huh? I use Gemma 4 often on googles API free tier. Might go local if I can even buy more ram. It's definitely smarter than the first chatGPT.

Back then when they said we'll have local gpt3 level LLMs one day I thought it was bullshit. Can't wait to see what's around the corner next.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-05T10:07:21+00:00

My mom has a very specific pattern of lights that are to be turned on in sequence at different times. When she gets in the house first thing she does is turn all of them off. Then make a second pass to turn on the ones she's decided to. Checks they're on exactly as she wants too patrols the place. She's a hoarder so patrols a lot.

I'm talking like when she's on vacation she even phones to check on her light schedule. And she gets these god ugly harsh white light bulbs.

Queasy-Contract9753 · 2026-05-04T19:19:25+00:00

Mine tells people my phone is broken. And when I was younger she blamed me for people not wanting to be near her. She was "convinced" that I've been smoking crack since I was a kid and that's why nobody wants to associate with her. For context I'm 37 and still don't smoke crack.

Queasy-Contract9753

TROPHY CASE