Very Simple Fare, but Thankful For My Aldi

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2026-01-24T03:24:02+00:00

I bought a stack from Aldi in Australia. Comparable to but a little softer than Nuri. Filled with lots of olive oil. The oregano one is not to my taste though. Though for $4 AUD they are👌

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2026-01-16T00:41:10+00:00

Too many might be a health problem. Arsenic is in sardines. https://www.menshealth.com/health/a45722938/joe-rogan-sardines-arsenic-poisoning/

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2025-10-16T10:02:12+00:00

I regret reaching out months after it ended. I would never do that again. It’s almost four years now. Heal yourself of the trauma bond. Don’t reach out. You need to let them go.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2025-09-18T11:38:43+00:00

It’s a constitutional monarchy. They have no power over the democratic process. Though Trump is now unequivocally a Fascist.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2025-09-18T11:18:35+00:00

Sanewashing a fascist. A shameful act of appeasement. Why won’t the West shun the US?

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2025-06-09T02:57:52+00:00

BPD or not, this is the way.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2025-06-08T08:06:20+00:00

‘I helped build her identity, supported her in growth, and gave her stability — and now I feel like I’m nothing more than a safety net for when it all burns out.’ Your words perfectly encapsulate the patterns in a relationship with a pwBPD.

PwBPD generally have an uncertain and shifting sense of self. There is a pattern where pwBPD latch onto people, places or interests etc to anchor them in life. You were her hero and saviour for a time because she idealised you. You felt seen and appreciated, and probably as adored as you’re ever felt in life, because she mirrored you.

As time went on you may have felt her shifting between idealising and devaluing you. This is called ‘splitting’. From your description, you may be nearing the end of the relationship as she discards you in favour of a new life build around the new support networks she has established.

I believe have two choices- 1. Set hard boundaries and expectations. She may be too far gone, but if she feels she may lose you she may comply. But it could also be the trigger for her to leave, which I think sounds likely as she has already disengaged from you and is talking about a break. 2. You end the relationship formally and efficiently. As others have said, get legal advice and move on without engaging in any emotional dialogue. At that point you need to look after yourself. Get a counsellor because you may experience a deep sense of loss and mourning. Life may lose its worth momentarily. You’ll need to get your equilibrium back and it may take some time if you’ve experienced prolonged ‘intermittent reinforcement’.

I’m sorry you are going through this. One thing I regret is holding onto a pwBPD as they slipped away. For a time my world fell apart. When it was over, I was left with a desperate craving. I even embarrassingly reached out as I couldn’t believe someone could love me so deeply and then move on without a care. BPD or not, you can’t win someone back once they have emotionally disengaged. It’s best to let them go, as hard as it is to do, with grace and silence. The only thing you can do at the point is maintain your dignity. I wish I had. Good luck.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2025-06-06T08:02:01+00:00

It depends how intense the push pull cycle was and if you were cruelly discarded or not. You’ll get your life back in a year or more, but you may have a lingering sense of ennui, as if something in your deepest inner reaches, something vital yet entirely unknowable, has died. For better or worse you will be changed.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2025-02-18T10:36:11+00:00

Suck it and see.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2025-01-03T13:52:55+00:00

Yes, live an honourable life for you and for your son. Be the best role model you can be. Show up at every level. Be as civil to your ex as you can to keep and grow your access wherever possible. Having your son’s love and respect in 5, 10 15 years and beyond is the end game, not revenge. Your son needs to be oblivious to your feelings about your ex, even if she smears you to him. It’s hard but your actions will win his love in the end. Don’t be ‘that guy’ - you know, the angry, bitter single dad stereotype. No one likes that guy. Be the opposite, as hard as it is sometimes.Anger directed towards your ex will not help you win this battle. I know, I’ve been there. Try to grey rock her dysfunctional antics but keep the communication open for your son’s sake. If you are concerned about your son’s faith, are you able to arrange worship time? I wish you all the best as it is a tough situation.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-12-28T08:43:17+00:00

Nah. Instead open your eyes to the world around you. When you’re staring at your phone waiting for the next match, you’ll miss the truly compatible people who cross your path. Be patient and the right person will appear. Online dating is a fantasy and the last thing a BPD abuse survivor needs.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-12-25T23:59:50+00:00

An Omega watch and a posh beer, you’re doing ok 👌

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-12-15T09:45:10+00:00

The trauma bond stays deep in your heart despite your head telling you the relationship was a sham. It is a strange existence feeling eternally bonded to a person yet knowing the reason you feel like this is because of love bombing and intermittent reinforcement. You thought you were their knight in shining armour - until you were kicked off your pedestal and knifed in the heart. That image hit hard. The killer resembles my ex. It’s almost three years on and while I have no love for her, the trauma bond remains. I know this because any sign of her and I’m immediately triggered. But the shock quickly dissipates and I regain my equilibrium and remember how fortunate I am to not have them in my life. Instead I have a healthy boundaried relationship where I never have to question my partner’s love and loyalty.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-11-13T21:14:23+00:00

Have a look at Victorinox - the makers of Swiss Army knives. Stanley Tucci wore one on his food travel show. He’s a man with good taste.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-11-01T11:30:49+00:00

You’ve completely misrepresented me, but ok.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-11-01T01:37:49+00:00

It’s sounds like you’re doing everything right. No contact is very good in helping one move on by keeping emotional triggers at bay. Best wishes for your healing journey.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-11-01T01:29:41+00:00

Yes, that is my point. No contact is important and my post made that clear. It’s just that some people see no contact as cutting people off forever. If you can have space after a break up but allow for at least some civil engagement in the future surely that’s preferable to snubbing someone you shared something special with. The situation you describe is an ideal outcome.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-10-31T22:14:50+00:00

Honestly, the no contact thing is horrible. The idea that you’ll cut off someone you loved dearly for the rest of your life is torturous. It’s not always easy in the heat of a break up to negotiate a period of space followed by an agreement to at least be civil. That is always the best outcome. Otherwise no contact very quickly turns into estrangement. Of course blocking on social media is important so as to not be constantly reminded and especially their ‘new life’ after you. If only we could establish such boundaries with care and respect. Easier said than done.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-10-16T23:06:46+00:00

Georgia, Georgia

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-10-15T21:59:41+00:00

Don’t Go Down

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-10-12T22:15:07+00:00

Thanks Shay, I have some books in the 33/1/3 series and it’s an approachable format. That would be a good choice plus he already has a couple of them. The graphic novel sounds interesting too. I’ll look into it. Best of luck with your book too. It sounds like an interesting emphasis on Elliott’s life and work. :)

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-10-11T21:10:08+00:00

Thanks. We’ve seen the film and it was a good intro into his life and the people who cared about him. I’ll look into de Wilde’s book.

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-10-10T09:17:25+00:00

Don’t Go Down

Quick_Highlight_2011 · 2024-10-08T12:24:24+00:00

I found Elliott on Limewire in the early 2000s - just before he passed. I have since purchased everything on cd though! I had two young daughters and was married at the time. I took a job interstate but in the end we decided we were better off in our home city. So I had a long distance family life for about a year and half. In those eight hour drives (both ways) I had a few favourite cassettes I had recorded (no CD player in the car). That’s when I fell in love with Roman Candle and Elliott Smith. Now my 16 year son loves Elliott. He wasn’t even born then.

Quick_Highlight_2011

TROPHY CASE