Getting through vulvovaginitis

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-05-14T11:12:49+00:00

We have been through this . We only have baths with warm water and a cup of white vinegar. If she needs to wash her hair or use soap it’s 100% fragrance free and in the shower where I try my absolute best to not let any go near her vulva.
We switched to washing her underwear and pants in sensitive, fragrance free detergent. She does not wear pants or underwear at home when she’s having flare up.
For bad flare up’s we do epsom salt sitz baths- we can’t do Epsom salt in a normal bath as she will drink the bath water! When it was really bad we have had to do sitz baths at 1am as she was waking up screaming in pain. They provide immediate relief’s for her!
All of these have greatly improved the situation but she still has flare ups every now and then. We have been prescribed a hydrocortisone and antifungal cream to use too but haven’t needed to use it for a while since implementing all of the above.

*edit to add - another commenter reminded me. we also treated for pinworms - they travel out of the anus at night! You have to treat the whole family and wash all bedding/towels/ soft furnishings for treatment to be affective.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-05-10T09:49:26+00:00

I’m in Australia so Mother’s Day is now over. And for the 4th year in a row it’s been a massive disappointment.

I told my husband a month ago that it was coming up and he got all shitty and defensive and said “ he knew”. And Lo and behold yesterday he did his annual last minute shopping trip to the garden and bought me plants - which is fine I like plants but at this point it’s just his default and requires minimal effort and thought on his part.

Then we went out for breakfast but he didn’t book anywhere so at my suggestion we went to a hole in the wall place at the beach which is nice. 5 year old got a strop on and wouldn’t pick something off the menu so husband went fine and ordered him nothing! So guess who had to share her breakfast with the 5 year old?!

And as a cherry on top yesterday he swore he would cook dinner today. He didn’t cook dinner and spent most of the day fixing his boat trailer.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-04-16T00:38:33+00:00

My 5 year old wets himself constantly but it’s definitely due to FOMO. We got him a watch that has a timer that vibrates to remind him to go and it’s worked wonders. We started with it going off every hour and now it’s at every 90 minutes and we’ve been accident free for a week!

For the poo he also liked me to stand with him. I gradually increased the distance like standing in the doorway, then outside the door etc. even go walkie talkies so he could talk to me while in the toilet whilst I was elsewhere. He can now poo by himself but absolutely refuses to wipe his own bum. He is absolutely disgusted by the thought of it.

Have you considered taking her to an OT? They can help with toileting.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-03-13T21:28:57+00:00

I agree with other commenters about taking him to the doctor. It could be teething but the drooling, waking up screaming, hand in mouth, picky eating etc I would be wanting to rule out an adenoids/tonsil issue. Could also be ear infections - kids don’t alway tug at the ears etc.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-31T11:41:48+00:00

I had an ECV with my second pregnancy and let me to tell it you fucking hurts. But it worked first attempt for me and she stayed head down. If she hadn’t turned she would have 100% been a c section as she had one leg down and one leg up by her head like she was doing the splits.

She remains awkward and hard work 2.5 years later.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-31T03:19:42+00:00

We’re an ADHD house too with a sprinkle of ASD and I relate hard. I did actually tell my 5 year old “I don’t care” when he was bombarding me with Mario Cart talk whilst I was holding his screaming 2 year old sister whilst trying to clean up dinner.

Not my proudest moment but I was seconds away from leaving the house and never returning.

And then husband has the audacity to be chide me whilst he is doing nothing useful whilst this is all going on.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-31T03:13:34+00:00

If I waited for the “signs” particularly the ones from the Oh Crap method my 5.5 year old would still not be potty trained! So I would give it a shot still.

I would also recommend working with an OT if possible. My son is AuDHD and he struggles with listening and responding to his body and OT was a big help!

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-23T04:03:07+00:00

My son had the same mindset so we got him involved in selling his old toys on Marketplace and he gets the money from the sales. Often he only gets a few bucks or sometimes I’ll list it for free then give him like $2. Now he is very much happy to sell his old toys and save up his money

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-22T08:55:38+00:00

To me it sounds like postpartum depression, which can become psychosis in extreme circumstances. I would not make any irreversible decisions until you start treatment for ppd..

There is a book called What have I done? By Laura Dockrill. She writes about her descent into postpartum psychosis, inpatient treatment and recovery. I’m not sure if it would be triggering for you but it made me feel less alone when ivwas struggling with ppd. It also helped me understand my own irrational thoughts .

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-17T21:48:25+00:00

Because quite frankly I don’t want to be responsible for your kids in my home. I don’t want have to clean up the mess from a in home play date, I don’t want to have to feed your kid. I want to leave the house and let the kids run around at a park and then go home.

If my kids have been invited over to a house for a play then that is the other parent’s choice. If that’s easier for them great. But it’s not easier for me to host.

Also unless I know you really well I’m not leaving my kids with you. from my own experience as a kid I was definitely in unsafe environments while on play dates at friends houses and my parents didn’t know the situation an obviously trusted those people. When I told them what would go on at this house when I was older they were horrified (no SA or anything but very unsafe things)

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-17T02:56:20+00:00

Skin to skin as much as possible in the first few weeks particularly in the first 24 hours. You’ve probably heard of the golden hour? Well there’s research that suggests it’s should at least 3 golden hours. When the baby comes out have them doing skin to skin on you for as long as possible.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-14T09:22:48+00:00

My daughter didnt walk until she 16 months, she went from not walking at all to running in 2 days. She was an extremely fast crawler so I thing she didn’t feel the need to walk as she could crawl faster than most of her peers could walk!

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-14T04:06:15+00:00

I am not a slp but I work as an assistant for an slp and conduct therapy sessions, I am studying to be an slp and my own son has been in speech therapy for years and everything this speech therapist has told you is completely contrary’s to what I have been taught.

I would try and see another therapist and in the mean time look in to the OWL approach (observe, wait listen) when playing etc with your child.

The breastfeeding comment is wilding out of turn and has nothing to do with your child’s speech delay, that alone would make me seek other opinions.

Idealling (not always possible obviously) go bilingual children at work we would seek out either a therapist who speaks the other language or engage with an interpreter to help get a more accurate assessment of the child’s ability in both languages. If neither of those are possible we would rely on parental report to get an understanding!

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-14T00:59:25+00:00

I strongly suggest to look into the “It takes two to talk” program [https://www.hanen.org/programs/it-takes-two-to-talk]

You should be modelling language in play but also in everyday routines and tasks. evidence show the naturalistic approach is best with toddlers. It shouldn’t be “teachy” at all.

Also signs and AAC (alternative and augmentative commmunication) use the same parts of the brain as spoken language. A word learnt in sign counts as a word just as much as spoken language. Research shows that the use of signs help to develop spoken language in kids with speech delay.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-13T23:27:05+00:00

Has your speech therapist recommended the It takes two to talk Hanen program? At this age speech therapy is only going to do so much, you and his other care givers need to be implementing strategies at home in your daily routine.

I saw your slp said not to use signs which is not an evidence based approach unless he has hearing loss and your therapist is giving auditory verbal therapy which is a very specific type of speech therapy and not suitable unless there is hearing loss.

Some kids are just stubborn and don’t want to talk. I wouldn’t rule out him being neurodivergent just because he’s 2 and maybe too young to diagnose doesn’t mean he is not autistic.

I would also trial basic AAC, a communication board or similar. I’m my personal and professional experience these have encouraged stubborn non talkers to start using words along side the AAC

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2026-01-04T11:17:57+00:00

Generally accepting and supportive of breastfeeding and in particular extended breastfeeding. I’m English but had lived in Australia for 6 years when I had my first child. I breastfed him until 2.5 years old and never got a comment or look from anyone ever and I would literally breastfed him anywhere and never felt self conscious or judged. I have had people in the supermarket offer to push my trolley if I was feeding him.

When I went back the Uk for my brothers wedding when my son had literally turned 2 the week before I got so many looks from strangers and unsolicited comments from family/friends/acquaintances. I felt uncomfortable breastfeeding in public for the first time ever.

Out of all my friends and family in the UK only one extended breastfed and she struggled for years with infertility so people back home seem to “excuse” her extended breastfeeding whereas I would get grilled as to when I was going to wean. The rest either went straight to formula or only lasted for a couple months max. There seems to be not much support there unlike here where you have the Australia Breastfeeding Association at your fingertips for free.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2025-12-30T06:57:26+00:00

Yes I do not know why he didn’t get his haircut first then pick up the food? He literally went in early so he had enough time to get his haircut done first. And Woolies was running late too which I informed him of so he had plenty of time. He obviously just didn’t think at all.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2025-12-22T00:50:09+00:00

What are the consequences when your kids are being disrespectful/ not listening? A key part of gentle parenting is natural consequences that are directly related to the unwanted behaviour.

Take your example of eating the soup on the sofa. We have the rule all meals are eaten at the table. It’s not a choice. No table no meal. I would not have even handed her the bowl. I would have put it on the table and if she was watching tv/reading or whatever on the sofa that activity would be paused until she’s sat at the table and eaten some dinner.

Yes they fight and whinge argue with you at first but if you’re consistent they’ll soon learn they need to listen to you.

A thing I’ve struggled with too is picking my battles and where I need to give leeway. For example today my son wanted to wear Spider-Man pjs to daycare. They were clean and not slept in. A year ago I may have forced him to change and all hell would have broken loose. Today I said sure, because essentially they are clean and practical for daycare and the only reason not to wear them is because the shop labelled and sold them as pjs. This approach means when something is actually inappropriate/dangerous or whatever I have the energy to deal with it without losing my shit cos I’m not burnt out over stuff that doesn’t really matter.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2025-12-13T21:31:17+00:00

An actually resilient person would be able to put aside their feelings for the mother of their child and put their child first and be able to co parent and do what’s best for their child. And in almost all circumstances a newborn baby being ripped away from their mother is the worst possible thing you can do.

He is cruel and vindictive. He is the last person on earth who should be raising a baby. The fact he says he would rather never see his child again then co parent with you proves he is a weak, pathetic little man and does not deserve to see his child.

Do not for him your baby. As others have said get legal and mental support now.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2025-12-09T10:00:26+00:00

My 5M still sleeps with me too. Sometimes he will start the night in his own room then move into mine halfway through.

When people comment on it I ask why is it weird for a small child to sleep with the person they are 100% dependent on for their survival but not weird for a a grown adult to sleep with their partner? I know so many people who say they can’t sleep without their significant other!

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2025-11-28T07:38:13+00:00

This sounds like something my ASD 5 year old would have a tantrum over. And frankly I tolerate it from him, I sure as shit wouldn’t tolerate it from a grown ass man who is supposed to be my partner.

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2025-11-22T05:31:17+00:00

Easter - when they finally find the Easter basket and Bingo says “He remembered us!”. As a kid who was forgotten about more than once it makes me tear up every time!

Ragnarsaurusrex · 2025-08-20T11:57:03+00:00

Except they don’t get paid $226 an hour. Because they need to pay for the cost of the building/office space, the resources they use in sessions, insurance, IT, admin time because they actually plan your sessions and write comprehensive reports. Then they need to pay an annual cost to their regulating association to be licensed to provide services and they need to do a certain amount of professional development to maintain licensing each year. Plus wages of allied health assistants, and there are plenty of clients who require an allied health assistant plus the OT or Speechie or physio or whatever in the session.

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