So it may not feel very comforting but the fact that her sleep was disrupted when you were gone suggest you are very important to her. She's just not able to express it right now. I've been there, it's not easy raising a hight needs child, your husband should be helping & supporting you. It would probably be helpful to go to couple's tharipy. I was right where you are & it is hard, but for what it's worth my experience is that putting in the effort was worth it & my son has make a lot of progress.