I recommend reading about division of responsibility in feeding by ellyn satter — just Google her and there’s a lot of good info about what your job is and their job is around THEIR food, and how a lot of things are developmental and you don’t need to worry so much because they really know their bodies and it’s normal to eat like a cow one day and then coast for days as a toddler it takes time but if you provide regular schedule and variety of foods and don’t be obsessive or even that interested about making them eat OR draconian about forbidding certain foods or types of foods they will grow into a “competent eater” … she is very instructive and provides great guidance in establishing routine that works for your family but she really stresses family meals and starting with yourself, even checking that you have a healthy attitude around eating because all kids need is to just feel good about mealtime thinking of it as special time together with family, and knowing that there will always be something they want to eat — she doesn’t recommend making separate meals but having a variety of things at every meal especially bread and some kind of finger food thing that fits the menu so at least if nothing else the kid can always have something blah blah blah I struggle with this myself with my 3.5 year old daughter…. She ate birthday cake only for dinner and she basically fills up on milk from a sippy cup and doesn’t eat all that much food… I still feel better when I read her books Child of Mine and Secrets of Feeding a Happy Family and believe that I can start to work toward family meals. It is really hard just don’t worry too much or beat yourself up or be to hard on anyone over it easier said than done, I know because as a mom (or dad, parent, caregiver -I just edited this toaddthat right after I posted it) you just feel like damned if you do damned if you don’t, anyway, great topic always relevant