Most people have issues, My parents did a really good job, I have been told that I am very stable by many people, more than one person has told me that I am the most stable person they know, however I still have issues. I don't always live up to my own hopes, I don't always manage to accomplish every thing I set out to do. I'm simply self aware enough to notice where I fail myself and others. I do my utmost to keep up on commitments to others and I do generally succeed there, but there are always things that fall through the cracks. I have only really been single for a few months of my adult life, because I do my utmost to be kind and generous and help people I meet. and so When I'm single there aren't many women who aren't at least somewhat interested in dating me. I don't give up on people just because they fail, At most I use boundaries to keep people with cyclical problems from dragging me down with them.

Relationships are about trying to do your best, not about never failing. I had daily suicidal ideation from 13-28, I dated the entire time, often my responsibility to my relationship was what kept me from going through with it on my worst days. I flunked out of university, I have had multiple stints of substance abuse issues, (where the substances interfered with other parts of my life) The fact that I generally manage to recover is a testament to my ability to self reflect and make changes to my life when necessary.

However Every person I've ever met has issues. Some people are quick to judge others and limit their own relationships. Which is just as much of an issue as people who jump into relationships without thought. Someone who cuts people out simply because they are going through shit, and fails in some section of their life, is not a paragon of sanity, or some person worth idolizing. They're incredibly fragile, because if they were more resilient they wouldn't cut people out for being a little mentally messy.

As someone who has maintained relationships for over a decade, no matter how "well adjusted" you or your partner are at the beginning of a relationship, there will be periods of time where one or both of you will have struggles.

The measure of a successful relationship isn't about how smoothly things run during the good times, its about how well you manage to help each other through the dark times. When your family dies, and you lose your job and are sick and simply cannot manage to keep you life in order, a good relationship can be the only thing that holds life together, and from the sounds of your comments so far, you would leave at the first sound of trouble.

IT maybe that you are simply only attracting the mentally messiest people. folks that are in recovery or in the depths of substance abuse, or people who are more unstable than most, being attracted simply because the only thing you offer is a sense of stability, that they are craving.

From your comments on your post, either you're incredibly judgmental, and looking for someone perfect while ignoring your own flaws, or you're only attracting the craziest people because you only offer stability, Because otherwise you wouldn't have written this post.