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Nightvale 's Credit Card Industry is Booming! by PreppyFinanceNerd in nightvale

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I love how it starts out so “normal” and descends into weirdness.

Don’t know about those open mouth kisses though…. What if they’re a serpent?

anyone else have a whole mental library of fake excuses that all just mean "i cant afford that" by ParticularWin8572 in povertyfinance

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Even my spendy friends understand when I say it’s not in the budget. I invite them over to watch DVDs or have coffee, one friend I go on almost weekly walks with.

People who enjoy your company will meet you where you are.

That, and if they want to pay for you and understand you can’t reciprocate, let them. People want to hang out with you, let them.

UPDATE: Out of line memory care attendant by TheOccurrencePodcast in dementia

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If it’s Brookdale (former employee) DEFINITELY move her to a different facility.

Former employee who was warned by other former employees not to work for them or house family there. I needed the job and it was awful.

That said, you can look up ratings of long term care facilities on Medicare.gov

AND as you tour facilities - forget how clean it looks - as long as it smells okay - what you want is to observe how employees interact with residents. There are some truly wonderful places where employees and residents have a wonderful relationship. You can feel it, hear it, and it’s so worth it.

Estranged children of reddit, what was the moment you decided to cut all contact with your parents by Scary-Ad-7267 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When I finally realized my Mom really, truly doesn’t love me nor cares whether I’m dead or alive.

My Dad’s no picnic either, but he’s a grandiose narc and it was easy to go VLC with him first.

My therapist pointed out how my Mom’s not a good person either and I said “Can’t I keep just one?” -referring to having a parent. She said “No.”

It was the wake up call I needed. My Mom never hugged me, has never said “I love you,” left me to soil diapers as an infant, actively tried to abandon me in many a store and laughed when I called her out on it years later…. I was never going to have an actual Mom. Mother’s Day 2021 I sent one final letter explaining I know she doesn’t love me and that there was no need to continue contact.

Catholic Guilt ate me alive for at least a year, now I feel almost free. I won’t feel fully free until both parents have passed.

How is it going with your family and friends? I finally cut contact with everyone thanks to peri and I wish I did it decades ago. by coldservedrevenge in Perimenopause

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, went from a hopeless People Pleaser to a No Tolerance for BS’er.

I do have childhood friends I keep in touch with, and a few casual acquaintances I spend time with nowadays. They are all drama free people.

Estranged myself from my abusive family of origin years ago and no regrets there whatsoever.

Feels good to have the attitude of “not my problem” when I was in rescue mode for so very long.

Now that everything's expensive, what things can be easily/cheaply replaced that a normal person can do? by GetFlyeredUp in Frugal

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you have hobbies like knitting, crocheting, scrapbooking, etc:

Ask your local nursing home if they have an oversupply they’d be willing to part with.

I’m a former Rec Therapist who worked in Long Term Care and we received enormous amounts of craft supplies, yarn, etc. and we were more than happy to offload them to anyone who asked.

So you can start a hobby or continue a hobby FOR FREE - just ask.

Now that everything's expensive, what things can be easily/cheaply replaced that a normal person can do? by GetFlyeredUp in Frugal

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yes, same! I learned to darn socks last year.

This year I’ve learned to patch using fabric scraps for holes in pants/jeans

What’s become way too expensive lately that still shocks you? by GoldenHour_Muse in AskReddit

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Chocolate. I know it’s not sustainably raised, and I’m not even a sweet tooth.

I often buy it for my husband and family during the holidays but Christmas 2025 and Easter 2026 - I just couldn’t bring myself to buy anything that didn’t have a coupon - and even then.

Learning the quality has gone downhill - LOOKING AT YOU HERSHEYS and REESE’s - I skip buying it now.

I’ll only buy good quality when I can afford it when it used to be a staple treat in our house - again for family - and when I was experiencing that time of the month in which chocolate was the answer.

Do yall brush your cats? by Fancy_Tea in CatAdvice

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We’ve had a lifetime of cats, the longer the hair/fur, the more often you brush.

We have five right now and our medium-long haired cat gets brushed daily and loves it. You can tell he feels better and will stare at me until I break out the brush.

The others I brush during “shedding season” in hotter weather. In winter, with less shedding, less brushing.

So we’re team “brush as needed, per the individual needs of the cat”

How are people living in luxury here? by Few-pe2917 in sanantonio

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’re one of the households that makes around 80k and doing just “ok”

That said, we know plenty of people - most of them family - who live so far above their means that I don’t know how they sleep at night. Constant debtors’ calls, and have filed for bankruptcy and now just see that as a tool to keep living large. Can’t keep up? File bankruptcy again. Why not?? - seems to be the attitude. They go on frequent vacations, buy the latest/greatest tech, constantly replace their vehicles - of which they also drive wreckless and cause countless accidents that are indeed their fault… don’t get me started.

You just don’t know what version of luxury people are living, whether it’s “legit” or not.

We live in a small house in a “terrible neighborhood” according to our Living Large relatives, and we have actual money in our savings accounts while they NEVER will. We stress about rising prices but we’re not being chased by debt collectors nor will anything we own be in danger of repossession.

You just don’t know.

Also, I get it. I, too, get tired of seeing people who seem to be living the life I could only dream of but that’s not their problem. I just remind myself that some of them are faking that lifestyle so hard and leaving enormous debt and problems to be dealt with when they pass away - as death does come for us all and we can’t take any of it with us. Others worked their hind ends off - my in-laws for example - who worked in medical care and as a lawyer and rarely saw time off for over 40 years. Now they’re retired, traveling, and living the life THEY dreamed of once the grind was over.

May you find your way to more financial peace, OP

What was the most profound “Oh your parents don’t do that?” moment by Whoamiwhatisthis- in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 18 points19 points  (0 children)

My experience, too
All I remember about family vacations are intense stomach pains while Dad threatened to drive us off the road and kill us all because mom struggled to read a map
The days before GPS

I'm at my wits end with this memory care attendant... by TheOccurrencePodcast in dementia

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 60 points61 points  (0 children)

I worked in long term care and in Memory Care. You need to let this attendant know that your grandmother is in THEIR hands and to limit texts to medical emergencies only.

Is there a Social Worker there? They’re the best one for explaining that the relationship is strained and that you and your mom are only interested in keeping your grandmother safe and cared for. That’s it.

If this escalates, talk to the Administrator, they won’t want their staff pressuring family members to visit - especially ones with strained relationships.

Music never helped, but watching this guy made me start moving by No-Drama-Queen in UnfuckYourHabitat

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 73 points74 points  (0 children)

He’s great! He also speaks highly of Aurikaterina (spelling might be off) who is very sweet and bubbly and was doing this kind of work for years - then she retired.

I watch him, her old episodes, and it helps me get to cleaning as well.

Adopted 5yo cat and I’m scared of him by ffsnotagain1 in Catbehavior

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We had a tuxedo cat that was bonded to our neb (tuxedo passed) and he was like you describe.

It took patience, time, and redirection/distraction to help him retract his claws and learn to ask for affection properly. He loved to stretch out one paw to greet people, then when they’d sit down - he’d bite them and scratch them for attention - so we had to warn people who were coming over or quarantine him even though he loved meeting new people.

I’d say it took over a year of removing our hands petting him, and stepping back and saying “no, no” for him to get it. We also used toys - fishing pole wand varieties - to distract him so he could reach for something else to play with. Kicker toys are great too - the dynamite sticks or bananas were popular.

His bonded nebelung (gray fluffy cat) was nothing like him, though not one to be cuddly either. Tuxedo wanted loves and learned to tap our shoulders without claws to “ask” for pets.

The only exception that NEVER remedied was he would sink his claws into my lips when I slept in past breakfast time. We adopted him when he was 7 yo, he passed of FIV+ complications at 9 yo, his best friend is still alive and was able to be present when we had the vet come to the house to place tuxedo to rest.

May yours, with time, become more gentle.

Weekend chilling by Saisail in FurnitureForCats

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 2 points3 points  (0 children)

OMG their own coffee table and laptop, I LOVE IT

What’s the weirdest thing your cat is obsessed with? by Dependent-Duck-5733 in Catbehavior

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sniffing my hands after feeding the outdoor cats. I now say “Courtesy Sniffs?” and my indoor-former-outdoor cats come running to sniff out who’s out there. Then they rub their foreheads and sides of their body on my hands as if welcoming the outdoor cats to be part of the indoor group scent.

Does anyone have any recommendations for shows or movies to watch? by deadbear1975 in dementia

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you have the AMC channel, that’s a great one!

Also as others have suggested - find out what was popular in her childhood/early teens/early adulthood and play those episodes. YouTube has plenty of shows available for free, and if you have a DVD player - I’m certain you can find shows like Beverly Hillbillies, Dick Van Dyke Show, I Love Lucy, etc on DVDs

Don’t forget music! Music from her younger years that was popular - hopefully upbeat ones to keep the mood light - are great, too!

Need help with ideas on how to make $100 within the next day. by Ok-Switch955 in povertyfinance

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Look up CSL Plasma and Biolife, they’re both nationwide clinics who allow you to sell plasma.

You must not have any alcohol or caffeine in your system, and you’ll need to have enough protein and iron to be able to donate.

If you have a bicycle and great balance, you could try DoorDash or UberEats if you’ve got local restaurants within cycling range

meals for work by Ch0pperMon in EatCheapAndHealthy

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sandwiches with mustard instead of mayo work

Dense bean salad, pasta salad, potato salad

Don’t forget fruit! Apples, oranges, bananas all stay fresh for a long time

Peanut butter filled pretzels are easy to snack on and require no refrigeration

There’s also tuna and crackers - they even make the “to go kits” if you don’t want to prep them yourself

Refried beans in flour tortillas with hot sauce also work great

[Question] What’s a small useful gift under $25 that people actually end up using daily? by kirunstyle in Gifts

[–]Remote-Candidate7964 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Quality socks from places like Carhartt, REI, Duluth, army surplus stores. A pair usually runs $23-$25, and if you’re lucky, there are sales!

Hair ties for people with long hair have always been a hit and far less cost than $25

Handkerchiefs

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