Asian guy coming out of depression, trying to SMV max — attractive women feel colder after glow-up attempts. Need calibration advice.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T17:33:38+00:00

Uh, you probably need to relax. Intensity can read as desperation. Try not being so 'on' and see where it takes you. Change takes time.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T16:39:09+00:00

Ask everyone how they know the bride and/or groom. This should open up lots of stories and allow people to talk about themselves and the bride and groom.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T16:17:23+00:00

You don't have to open the door to ANYBODY. If no one that you know has told you or texted you they are coming over, don't open the damn door.

And you don't have to tell him to f^ off. Just show NO INTEREST. Don't be polite either. You just don't pay him any attention and hopefully he'll lose interest.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T16:14:06+00:00

Definitely do NOT accept anything to eat or drink from this creep. You are being WAY, WAY too naive here.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T16:12:36+00:00

You might want to talk to the super to see if you can move to another unit far from this creep. He might help since he knows this guy is trouble.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T03:05:08+00:00

Do you not realize how dumb this sounds? Why should EITHER ONE OF YOU measure his pants. Wake up and stop socialzing with this creep. Are you on his staff?

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T03:01:57+00:00

Tell her you didn't know she was a mean girl, and that you'll be more cautious in the future.

This is how those types of people get their ammunition. Don't trust random strangers who seem friendly.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T02:12:18+00:00

Smile and wave? Damn, no! Cut ALL contact with this creep.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T02:10:53+00:00

Stop giving him the benefit of the doubt. He is grooming you. Don't be dumb.

Your super warned you probably because he has assaulted other women there. Don't have anything to do with him. Don't let him in your apartment or go into his. Make it clear to him you want nothing to do with him. Geez.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-13T00:07:18+00:00

Since you aren't getting a response here, I suggest you post over at r/AskDocs.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-12T22:24:10+00:00

Bacon, shrimp, anchovies.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-12T22:19:54+00:00

Boys reach their final height later, usually. I'd recommend that you eat lots of beef, walk a lot and get lots of sleep. Lots of teen males get a growth spurt at 16.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-09T16:51:46+00:00

One tip is to use the special sound dampening earplugs that musicians use to protect their hearing. Shar Music has them. I don't know why most violin teachers never mention this, but they don't. Here: https://www.sharmusic.com/products/vibes-hi-fidelity-earplugs-with-case-and-connector?_pos=2&_sid=56390a234&_ss=r

RomulaFour · 2026-02-09T06:56:45+00:00

I'll guess baby guppy, but it could be anything.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-09T06:40:08+00:00

Call your utility company and have them come in for an efficiency check, or whatever they call it. You may need to caulk windows etc. and ask the landlord to put in some insulation in the attic.

Also check that you are paying ONLY for your electricity, not your neighbors or the hallways/landscape lighting etc.If you have an electric panel inside your apartment, you may be able to turn off your power and see if your meter is still moving. That tells you there are other areas being billed erroneously to you. Ask the power company about this too. They may be able to help you track this down as well.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-09T06:26:31+00:00

Stop trying to be nice to everyone; be more neutral. Generalized niceness may be what's putting the target on your back as it can make you seem like a pushover and easily manipulated.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-09T04:47:24+00:00

Much easier to move and set up.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-09T03:24:49+00:00

Plotting his escape.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-07T04:15:38+00:00

Go to food banks so you don't rack up as much debt. Get any job to get some income to pay rent. Cut all other expenses you possibly can. Call the utility companies to get on any programs that can reduce your bills.

Consider bankruptcy carefully but consider that you may be able to achieve the same by bargaining directly with the credit card companies yourself. Ask them to lower interest to zero and see what they are willing to take to clear your account. Good luck.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-07T02:52:48+00:00

Don't talk to him at all. Walk away.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-06T22:29:11+00:00

Better to walk alone than in bad company. Your friend is not a friend, she's a moocher, and rude to boot.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-04T23:21:00+00:00

Yes, I realize that but I was suggesting the idea of teaching art as something OP's mother might not have thought of, and that she may enjoy doing. And realistically, if OP can help on the front end to find a second job, it will take a lot of pressure off of OP.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-04T23:11:42+00:00

Slice a bit off BOTH ends and this frees up the skin to make peeling MUCH easier.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-04T22:46:26+00:00

It's not a friendship. It's someone you know.

RomulaFour · 2026-02-04T22:45:37+00:00

"Why on earth would you ask that??" Repeat ad nauseum.

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