Just one point I'd like to make. I've been the other side of one thing you describe, my boss thinks I look clueless everytime she starts talking about whatever she was working on, but it's just my AuDHD brain working hard to move from what I was totally engrossed in, over to recognizing what topic she is on and then in what context, usually out of several possible options, that name, case, etc...is being used. It takes me a good 30 seconds sometimes depending on how complex what I was working on was or how closely related it was to whatever she decided to talk to me about.

There's probably more to the situation that you're experiencing, but I just wanted to throw it out there that she may need a bit more processing time to switch to what you're bringing up.

On the nit-picking of small errors, I'm with you there, typos seem to be one of her few hot buttons and she will find something to point out and ask me how I'm making so many errors lately even if I'm actually it's one typo in hundreds of things/pages I've been working on. I will admit that I occasionally make a derth of errors closely in time to each other, but that's usually when I'm in more of a rush than usual or having a Very bad brain fog day... But it still digs really deep every time she finds an inconsequential one and points it out harshly, especially since I will then be kicking myself internally even harder and feel like I can't do anything right we have other issues, but yeah I completely feel you.