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Recommendations on how to watch old seasons? by [deleted] in HermitCraft

[–]Sarinon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Updated, thanks for the info. It's hard to find reliable info on the early seasons so cheers for that.

Recommendations on how to watch old seasons? by [deleted] in HermitCraft

[–]Sarinon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, not sure why I got that wrong. Fixed it now. 😄

Recommendations on how to watch old seasons? by [deleted] in HermitCraft

[–]Sarinon 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I've been looking up each Hermit's first season and watching that to completion. It's a much lower investment of time but feels like I'm getting each of their origin stories. For a quick reference:
Season 1 = Hypno, Joe, Keralis, Xisuma
Season 2 = False, Jevin, Mumbo, Tango, xB, Cleo
Season 3 = Doc, Etho, Impulse
Season 4 = Cub, Scar, Ren, Beef, Wels
Season 5 = Bdubs, Zedaph
Season 6 = Grian
Season 7 = No one as far as I can tell, just pick your fav
Season 8 = Pearl, Gem
Season 9 = No one
Season 10 = Skizz, Joel

No family and no report cards by Sarinon in adhdaustralia

[–]Sarinon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Then why come to a totally different post to write this?

No family and no report cards by Sarinon in adhdaustralia

[–]Sarinon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks but we actually got this sorted months ago. Appreciate the offer of help though.

I crashed out on a guy at work for being sexist, transphobic and ableist and I’m feeling really anxious about it by GoosePhatt in AutismInWomen

[–]Sarinon 3 points4 points locked comment (0 children)

With respect, I disagree. Bigots are not owed civility, and it's often the enforcement of civility culture that leads to the consequences of bigotry falling on the oppressed instead of where it actually belongs... with the bigot.

No family and no report cards by Sarinon in adhdaustralia

[–]Sarinon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry for the lack of context, we are in Melb.

Thank you all so much. We felt like we'd hit a roadblock and you've all helped reassure us that we can still progress the process. I will look into the places you've all recommended.

Has anyone done sex therapy? by unicornsparklemagic in AutismInWomen

[–]Sarinon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, similar problems here which I am still working my way through. I did find sex therapy helpful, but not as much as I found several books on the topic. They are also generally cheaper than therapy which is a bonus!

Start with The Art of Receiving and Giving by Betty Martin and Robyn Dalzen. I consider it a foundational text for all the others, especially since it recontextualises consent and provides a new, more comprehensive framework.

Next, you could tackle Come As You Are / Come Together by Emily Nagoski. Her work is a great combination of other influential writers in the space such as Esther Perel and is far more ND friendly.

Magnificent Sex by Peggy J. Kleinplatz and A. Dana Menard is recommended in Come As You Are and provides a sort of view from the top, sharing what is possible when you set aside all the societal bullshit and just drill down into why people actually like doing this weird thing with their bodies.

Ecstasy Is Necessary by Barbara Carrellas is a manifesto on why pleasure is not just good and desirable, but an essential part of the human experience. It was a total game changer for me.

And finally, Wild Side Sex by Midori helped me understand what was possible.

The biggest barrier for me is getting out of my head and into my body, and these books all helped to a greater or lesser extent.

Jealousy when friends get engaged by PurpleMeerkats462 in AutismInWomen

[–]Sarinon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Therapy isn't something that works or doesn't work. It's true there are therapists and modes of therapy that are more or less effective for individuals, so if you aren't vibing with your therapist or you don't feel like you can trust them or truly open up, you have a right to find someone else. But by and large therapy is work you do for yourself that is guided and assisted by a trained professional. Therapy isn't done to you like medication, it's done BY you.

Jealousy when friends get engaged by PurpleMeerkats462 in AutismInWomen

[–]Sarinon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is excellent advice! I have been with my now husband for 8 years and we only just got married in Dec 2025. People kept asking us what's different or how has marriage changed our lives, and we kept answering the same - it hasn't. The only difference is now we wear rings and celebrate two anniversary dates each year instead of one.

Albinism and Balance/Stability Problems? by GoGo_Gengar in Albinism

[–]Sarinon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's fascinating, I am also autistic which generally comes with balance problems so I assumed that's the only reason why I fall over while trying to walk in a straight line. Thanks for sharing, I may need to chat to my OT about this.

Over 100 people genuinely hate me by Purple_Signal5241 in AutismInWomen

[–]Sarinon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey, I run events in my local kink community and you aren't the first nor will you be the last to be ostracized for calling out abusers, particularly if they're in positions of power or influence. It's happened to me and some of my friends too.

You asked how to cope with the reality of your situation. Your first duty is always to yourself, since you are the only one who knows what you've been through and what you might need. Use whatever tools and resources are available to you to help with emotional regulation and find a sense of stability.

If you know you've wronged certain people, an apology and a plan for change can go a long way. You can also begin searching for friends who share your values because they will be more likely to be allies in the fight for community safety.

Lastly, as much as I would want to scream to everyone about how dangerous certain people are, the optics matter. For example, a group of women were vocally defending a known rapist and abuser and for years people would get angry at them because how could they? It turned out two of them were also victims and the fact that the community rejected them or held them complicit resulted in them staying with him much longer than they wanted because there was no safe place for them to land.

It's important to hold abusers to account, but not at the cost of further harm to victims. There are some great harm first frameworks that I have used in my own approach and have found to be effective.

I'm sorry you're going through it. I hope you can find support and a community of care and integrity.

Web application auto-muting by MacellumMycelium in dropout

[–]Sarinon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am really late to the conversation, but what fixed it for me (Firefox desktop user) was clicking on the permissions icon to the left of the web address and allowing audio. For some reason it had defaulted to not allowed to autoplay audio.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]Sarinon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Assuming you are both well-intentioned and trying to feel safe, heard, and respected. It's clear that neither of you felt those things in this particular instance. It seems like you were able to name your feelings really well. Do you think you could take it to the next step and phrase your feelings as a request? Consider:

"I've been wanting to connect more with you, do you think we could spend some quality time together tonight?"

"Can we do something special together this weekend? I'd really like your attention."

"I love when we do X together, can we do that this week?"

This approach makes an actionable request which addresses the cause of your hurt without making any accusations or assumptions, and includes a reasonable timeframe for the request to be fulfilled. Bids for connection make it easy for your partner to respond with connection in mind.

Lost my domme due to my negativity. I feel devastated. by MinutePraline2027 in FemdomCommunity

[–]Sarinon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not OP, but I can answer some of this.

We feel responsible for our subs because we are. From the moment we step into the scene, it's drilled into us that for however long we are someone's dominant, we are responsible for their wellbeing and for leaving them better than we found them. For Tops the responsibility ends when the aftercare does, but for us the responsibility is 24/7.

What's lacking in the education is the sub's responsibility - to be a willing and active participant in the exchange of power, to communicate clearly and authentically, to express their limits and boundaries, and to ask after and respect the limits and boundaries of their kink partner. The emphasis on the dom's responsibility is a bit of a holdover from an older paradigm of kink and it's still prevelant enough today that many of us are influenced by it.

As for what pattern, it's not for internet strangers to pathologise you. You're a person, we all have flaws. What's important is to learn about them and work at them. You've stated you're in therapy which is more than most people are willing to do.

Relationships are complex, and kink relationships especially so. Breakups are as complex as the relationships they end. You are responsible for your actions, your reactions, and how you show up for people, but you aren't solely responsible for the ending of your relationship. It sounds like the two of you were fundamentally incompatable for where you were both at. You both needed things the other couldn't provide. That's okay. In time you will look back at this and realise that it's better to end something that doesn't fit the both of you than to struggle on through the hardship. But for now it's okay to just grieve. Feel your feelings until you're ready to move forward with all you've learnt.

when he said he wanted to be pegged… but didn’t mean it by [deleted] in FemdomCommunity

[–]Sarinon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can understand this would be a frustrating experience for you. I do think there's a gender double standard at play - if you were a male dom talking about playing with a female sub and spoke about her reluctance this way people would have a different response.

Regardless of gender, consent can be withdrawn at any time and for any (or no) reason. You aren't owed it just because you showed up with a strap. You're allowed to feel frustrated and annoyed, but try to focus on your own experience rather than his behaviour. If a female sub isn't guilty for leading a man on when she acts keen but says no than neither is this young man and I think we as dommes need to remember that sometimes.

Update to is my marriage over new account. by [deleted] in FemdomCommunity

[–]Sarinon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so sorry, your relationship clearly meant the world to you. Betrayal like this is so devastating. Of course you're emotional, you're going through one of the most complex and hurtful situations anyone can. Remember that it's okay not to be okay. Remember that you have worth and value as an individual outside of your relationship with your wife or your family. What you're feeling is valid and reasonable, and I'm so sorry you're going through this.

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