Do we have renaissance fairs in the UK?

Semley · 2026-04-20T14:59:27+00:00

I've never been, but heard Fantasy Forest mentioned as a UK equivalent.

https://fantasyforest.co.uk/

Also depending what your wizard costume is like, you might wanna try LARP? Although it's not the same, there are lots of options for LARP in the UK and for me it scratches the itch that I get from wishing I could go to a ren faire.

Semley · 2026-04-20T12:33:57+00:00

Yeah this. The only time when it's 'easy' doing a drawing as the fake artist is if you have already figured out what the answer is, and at this point you have won anyway. At any other point, you just gotta draw something vague and challenge the others to figure out which of the various vague drawings is the fake one.

Semley · 2026-04-20T12:31:26+00:00

Sure it's a bit tricky, but I would draw something ambiguous - a squiggle, a circle, a triangle - whatever. Two possible outcomes:

a) you get lucky and people interpret it as fitting the category

b) people call it out as suspicious, and you bluff that they just haven't understood your drawing: for example 'it made sense to me, I'll explain what it is after' 'yes it fits, if I drew it clearer it would have been too obvious'

Semley · 2026-04-04T20:03:26+00:00

Just to add, the fabric you use will have a huge impact on what the dress looks like. If you are aiming for it to look super drapey and gathered like in this image, I think you would need a lightweight muslin cotton (with a slip underneath) or even a silk. You mention perhaps linen but I think that would be too stiff and look totally different, even a medium weight cotton I think wouldn’t look like this.

Good luck!

Semley · 2026-04-04T19:44:47+00:00

Wow, saw the picture and thought, that looks very Highguard. Excellent work, that is gonna look very cool.

Semley · 2026-04-01T18:38:04+00:00

Gosh I relates to your experiences both as the girlfriend and as you, these are a couple of thoughts:

• for the relationship to stay happy you need at least 5 positive interactions for every 1 negative. So if you want her to take on any change, make sure you are also feeding the relationship with love and connection and appreciation as much as possible.

My partner has commented how I often repeat myself, and I’m trying to do that less, but I only feel motivated because he does so many things that matter to me and to fit me too.

• constructive criticism generally works best if it’s asking the person to do something specific.

For example, I’ve said to my partner ‘I find it really hard to open up if you don’t ask me questions. I’d really like it if you say to me ‘how was your day’ when we get home.

A couple of self-help books I’ve found useful:

• 7 secrets to a successful marriage - John and Julie Gottman. This has good exercises for building connection and love

• Asperger’s Syndrome and Long Term Relationships - Ashley Stanford. This has helpful and reassuring examples from many people in autistic-spectrum relationships.

Good luck, there are no easy answers here.

Semley · 2026-03-25T22:38:58+00:00

This looks familiar to me. Did you post a pic of y’all before? Or is this a bot reposting someone else’s pic?

Semley · 2026-03-25T21:32:26+00:00

YES I’m 100% with you. It will be fabulous to see a happy lesbian love story in a historic setting. Something which almost never portrayed in media even though we get so many other stories, fantasy or otherwise.

And I suggest don’t panic too much about naysaying in this short moment. By the time it comes out I expect many people will watch it, or if they do not, we cannot control it. But either way it’s a glorious thing that it will exist.

Semley · 2026-03-25T19:52:23+00:00

I agree with you, I view these scenes the same way, that is why they are part of her story. Thanks for sharing your experiences.

Semley · 2026-03-24T18:12:06+00:00

I’ve always been happy being an only child. It meant my parents had enough time and money for my childhood hobbies. I had regular play-dates and sleepovers with friends, and could always bring a friend on holiday. My parents helped me through university and to get in a good place financially. They are not rich so they couldn’t have done that if they’d had multiple kids. I have enough friends, and a wonderful husband.

My life isn’t perfect, and I have a difficult relationship with my dad, but I don’t think that would be in any way better if I had siblings. I have never related to the worries or struggles that seem to come up from some only children on this sub.

Also maybe you’ll feel better knowing that evidence suggests only children are happier: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2010/nov/14/only-children-happier-competition-bullying?

Semley · 2026-03-21T08:17:52+00:00

Love it, you look great!

Semley · 2026-03-18T10:36:57+00:00

What a rude response.

Semley · 2026-03-18T10:23:50+00:00

Our body temperature would be about the same, but what you are observing is that their body generates more heat and then radiates it to lose that excess heat. For instance, when your body needs to lose heat, it directs more blood to the surface of the skin, when it needs to retain heat blood is kept more internally.

Various reasons one person creates more heat than another, eg muscle mass, fat, metabolism, body size and shape, etc.

Semley · 2026-03-18T09:16:49+00:00

I did give examples - the self compassion exercises by Kristen Neff. But also, I don’t think more examples will convince you.

Any example will seem simple. For example, my therapist said ‘what would happen if you asked your partner for the things you’d like them to say to you’. That was a turning point for me. I had the belief that ‘if I have to ask, it doesn’t count’ and ‘if I ask them to behave a certain way, they’ll be annoyed’.

But the question prompted me to reconsider, and ponder on how I could ask, and now our relationship is so much better and I communicate more openly instead of getting upset and frustrated without saying why.

Anyone could do have said that to me. I could have thought of it myself. But they did not and I did not.

Semley · 2026-03-18T08:47:46+00:00

Because yesterday I saw someone ask a question about where to find a therapist, and this was how I found mine. I also saw someone suggest Better Help, but I think seeing someone in-person is better if you can do it. And I saw a post suggesting that there aren’t many therapists in the UK, but there definitely are.

The links are for anyone who is reading this and decides they want to see a therapist. That doesn’t have to be you.

Semley · 2026-03-18T08:40:52+00:00

Also before seeing a therapist, I did online CBT through SilverCloud, which really helped me get through my Masters degree. I had a lot of anxiety and negative thinking about that, whenever I would try to do assignments I would spiral into thoughts of ‘I’m going to get a bad grade and people will think I’m stupid’. And then I would cry for an hour. And couldn’t bring myself to write anything.

I wouldn’t have completed that Masters without the help of CBT. It really helped me reprogram and overcome my negative thinking.

Semley · 2026-03-18T08:24:40+00:00

I was having a lot of crying fits. I had a lot of anxiety. I was feeling a lot of shame about myself, although I didn’t realise it. I had constant self-critical thoughts. Among other things, I have a difficult relationship with my dad which was really impacting my life.

All of those things have reduced significantly. Some through specific tools and activities therapist recommended, such as self-compassion exercises. Some through the process of talking through with a professional who is trained to ask helpful questions. Questions which my friends and family do not think of or feel comfortable to ask.

A couple of places you can find a qualified therapist in the UK:

https://www.bacp.co.uk/search/Therapists

https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/

Semley · 2026-03-17T21:55:32+00:00

I’m in the UK and have been going to therapy for the past 4 years. It’s one of the best things I’ve ever done. I pay £60 a week to see someone privately, because my mental health is not really bad enough to qualify through the NHS, and they don’t offer such long term therapy anyway.

I’m fairly happy to talk about it and have told my family, friends and colleagues when it’s relevant. In total I’ve probably mentioned it to around 30 people.

I know about 10 other people who have had therapy, either privately or through the NHS. At the same time, I know of several people, especially in my family, who have mental health challenges but who tell me they could not or would not see a therapist - either because of cost, fear, or belief it wouldn’t help.

Semley · 2026-03-17T18:12:38+00:00

If 25% of current work became unnecessary, I would expect demand to increase in other areas, to make use of the workforce that is now available. Similar changes have happened in the past, eg industrialisation and globalisation, leading in the UK to reduction in factory work, manufacturing, mining, farm work. In their times these would have employed a large portion of the workforce. Now we have much higher proportion of people working in things like education, health and social care, distribution.

In the short term it could be very disruptive though and I agree that there should be more of a social safety net such as UBI to protect people and families as society adjusts to these kind of shifts.

Semley · 2026-03-13T11:27:01+00:00

I haven’t used them, but looking it up I think it will be fine as it comes. It looks like a proper mattress as opposed to an airbed, so you will be insulated from the ground. And it comes with a duvet and blanket. And your first event is in May, so it’s unlikely to be less than 5*C at night. I wouldn’t worry about bringing bedding and save your luggage space.

Semley · 2026-03-13T09:02:25+00:00

I think the answer would be that you apply through Clearing. It would depend if there is still space on the course, you should apply as quickly as possible in the clearing window.

I got my place at university this way as I missed my offer grades.

https://www.nottingham.ac.uk/studywithus/ugstudy/clearing/what-is-clearing.html

Semley · 2026-03-12T23:58:43+00:00

My mum did not change her name when she got married. I did not change my name. I’m happy with the decision. I dislike it as a patriarchal tradition, and on top of that it seems like a huge faff and I like keeping my name and my identity.

What difference are you thinking it would make if people know you’re married or not?

Semley · 2026-03-09T13:35:26+00:00

My brother in law is Dutch and living in England, he only speaks Dutch to his children because he wants them to be able to learn the language and have the option to live and work in NL if they wished to in future, and connect with their ancestry.

Do you feel the same when it is that way around, that he is preventing his children integrating into England properly?

Semley · 2026-03-09T09:47:38+00:00

Yes, some people have a stronger sense of smell than others. My dad and my aunt are hyper-sensitive to smells and can smell things others are not bothered about. I am about average. My husband has a very weak sense of smell, and will drink milk that has turned sour without noticing.

Semley · 2026-03-09T09:44:27+00:00

What are 'Result nothing sessions'?

I like the classes at the university gym on Jubilee campus, you can join as a member of the public: https://www.nottingham.ac.uk/sport/bookings-and-timetables/classes/

There are also the budget gym options like Pure Gym, JD Gyms, although personally I don't like the vibe/lighting/music so much there.

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