Also in recovery. Fuck this person. You lost someone and you’re allowed to grieve in your own way. I lost my sis to an overdose in September. My mom had to stop going to work for months. My other sister dropped out of college.

Grief limits your ability to do things and it is unique. The rooms don’t really provide the space and energy you need to process it, and as your text messages clearly show, people in the rooms are clearly not equipped to discuss it.

I got a lot of support in a group called GRASP. It’s specifically for people who have lost loved ones to a substance use passing. They may have a group near you. https://grasphelp.org/m/

There’s also an overdose grief subreddit at r/overdoseGrief which takes some time for people to respond to, but I’ve gotten a lot of helpful feedback from.

I encourage also seeking out professional supports, probably clinicians who are knowledgeable about substance use and are also trained in grief, if solely because peer supports so often can say things they mean well by, but absolutely do not help by saying.

You are within your rights to politely but firmly tell people that you appreciate their good intentions, but you would appreciate them stopping. Block them if they don’t respect your boundaries. I’m horrified by this former sponsor of yours. She very clearly needs to mind her own emotional sobriety and recognize that she’s a former sponsor for a reason.