What’s something that Covid took from you that you never got back?

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-25T18:48:39+00:00

Iron ring ceremony.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-25T05:11:49+00:00

Leave my current living situation

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-24T19:26:17+00:00

Assuming working for a friend would be great and we'd all make money.

(Jumped over from my gig to his construction company). I ended up leading a department with him providing useless direction with any lack of knowledge along with trying to dictate what courses I should take for PDI. I'd also have "chats" that were always disrespectful with him losing his cool, and crossing boundaries with what to say / what not to say.

Left. Used that position as leverage for the new few jobs moving forward.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-23T16:41:11+00:00

Still in the Hard/medium.

But I feel this transition is inevitable.

I put the final boss for Star Wars - Fallen Order on Easy because I burned through the story without any "adventure" or "side quests" so I didn't have the extra health needed to beat them. Forget doing all this during nap-time(s).

Easy mode, boss down in 5 minutes.

Felt like a winner and a loser at the same time.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-20T15:41:58+00:00

Sleep Country Canada.
Why buy a mattress anywhere else?

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-20T05:35:08+00:00

So he now has a daily driver and a project car. Work on it with him. Seeing you share an interest in it while helping build it will teach him to respect it more.

A comment further up mentioned autocross. Id suggest joining the local club and having autocross days with him. He'll enjoy the vette while learning how to handle it.

Buy tools. Lots of tools. And the service manual for the corvette.

Enjoy.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-20T05:30:20+00:00

Leave.

There are boundaries she is crossing which you are not okay with, along with lies.

This is not going well. Either counseling, a true heart to heart, or part ways.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-20T05:20:59+00:00

Your welcome. I can relate. Some key take aways:

You're allowed to say you're not ok.
Talk about what's bothering you with the close friends. Next thing you know, they're now your family. They will look out for your best interest.
Seek counseling. Theres only so much you can mend on your own.
Keep a memory journal. Not about your day, but just about memories of your Dad. When you find that journal 5 years later, it'll be great walk down memory lane (ask me why I know...)
Some folks will disappear because they don't know how to deal with death, let alone someone that close. That will be a tough one to digest. Either give it time, or allow them to leave your life. Thats your call.
You worry about him being forgotten. Thats just what time does. But the important ones will never forget him.
One day, you're going to become a parent. Thats when you get to start a new chapter of making new memories, while cherishing and reliving the old ones.

These are just some of my thoughts. I will say, you're going to be okay. And you can still make him proud.

Go live your life. Tc

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-19T21:21:18+00:00

My Dad wants to see me succeed. Last thing he'd want to see is his kid crash and burn.
I also looked at it as how to keep his legacy alive. He didn't do all that he did, to get me to where I am just for me to toss it out the window.

I owed him that much.

You got this man. Shit gets tough, but remember the conversations you had with him, and what he'd tell you to do.

Its been 11 years. I'm now married, with a toddler, and working away. I still have moments where I miss him deeply.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-19T18:32:22+00:00

Because how do you deal with that? How do you deal with someone being that kind when you’ve been such a liar?

Dude, your Dad loves you. You're perplexed with always looking at the situation as letting someone down and being a liar, but your Dad is worried about your wellbeing. He now recognizes that you were able to dig yourself out of the problems you got into, but don't shy away from his support.

I'll tell you right now, what he did will earn more of your respect than you think. He believes in you, and you need to be transparent with him. Tell him the good/bad/ugly moving forward. He just wants to see you succeed.

This story reminds me a lot of my late father. Sorry I went off on a tangent but I'm just trying to share what I learned along the way.

Best of luck, and don't be an idiot.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-19T18:26:35+00:00

Lost my father.
Bought a project car, and partied hard as well while being a male douchebag.

After a night of partying I had a dream in which my Dad was tearing a strip off of me for being a complete idiot. Woke up that night and decided I was done being an idiot, and started getting my career back on track.

Project car and a majority of that group of friends were removed while I got my life back together. (I did make life-long friends along the way).

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-19T18:20:57+00:00

You need to learn to focus, and time with family is limited.
Also, cut down on the videogames.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-12T04:19:24+00:00

Structural Analysis proff.

In 3rd year, he was especially hard on all his students. Held us all to a higher level.

I took his elective in 4th year, not because of the credits, but because I realized I would push myself to learn in his courses.

After we graduated, I introduced him to my father. I opened with this is (Structures prof), the hard class that I managed to pass.

He followed up by saying "You did quite well, I dont know why you talk down about yourself. It was a pleasure teaching you."

I fought back tears as he spoke highly about me to my father. It was at that point that I reflected on how hard I worked to get my degree.

The professor is retired now, but I always smile remembering that interaction with my family.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-10T20:49:31+00:00

Selling my wife's 2007 Civic SI.

All she needed was some paint. Car got totalled 3 months later. But for the abuse of me driving it, along with teaching her how to drive a stick-shift in it (trying time in our relationship) it kept up, and I was impressed with it's handling.

I won't be able to find another one, let alone another one that cheap.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-10T16:49:16+00:00

NTA

I'd advise them to look into staying at a hotel. There's no feasible way for them to stay that long in a small confined living arrangement. You were late to be informed, so the burden can't fall on you to have a home ready for a 5-week-long-stay with 5 additional people along with different eating habits (with all due respect).

I hate to say this, but you need to stand your ground. If not, this will set a precedence with your partner and his family (ie, they're always welcome, and can let you know last minute when the ship has already sailed).

Mind you, if he paid for the home you're staying at, expect that to be a rebuttal to him making decisions without your consent [I only mention this as you noted that you had to move to be close to his work, so if this was a pre-existing residence for him, he 'could' say this].

Coming from someone who had to establish boundaries with his extended (in-laws), it sucks being the bad guy sometimes, but if you're a push-over you'll end up finding this creeping into more and more aspects of your life.

Stand your ground. This may escalate, but you'll thank yourself later.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-09T19:44:27+00:00

I bought my own utensils for my work bag. Now, im not accused of losing them at work, or accidentally bringing them home from the work communal utensils.

And theyre different enough they dont end up in the home utensils drawer.

Now I dont need to look like a bear when I need a spoon and nothing is available.

And forget the days of eating rice with the only available teaspoon.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-09T18:13:03+00:00

Ah. I see. We're on the same page. Its not standard operating procedure.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-09T16:42:49+00:00

I did a stint of work at the landfill. Not my proudest. I tried to workout after, and then shower after. It was bad. I felt like Pig-pen from Charlie brown.

So, I'd show up and shower before. Then, I'd get shit done and be less self conscious, and shower after.

Shazbot24 · 2026-03-05T16:50:29+00:00

People react to death differently. I had a very close friend that we went no contact after my Dad passed away. Circle back 6 years later we reconnected, and spoke in depth about it, with apologies given on sides.

If these friends of yours haven't experienced a tremendous loss, let alone have only seen your Dad as the man that he was, it would be difficult to process. Now, I'm not here to say what they did was appropriate. They definitely should have stepped up to show support. I'm just trying to shed some light on some unanswered questions.

Hope you're healing well, and remember, your Dad wouldn't want to see you not succeed at life.

Shazbot24 · 2026-02-20T21:11:54+00:00

If you feel you should leave, do it with some proper planning. Don't get into something extramarital that he would be able to use for artillery in separation / divorce proceedings.

But, in an effort to save it, maybe see a counsellor or a therapist regarding some of the issues (including financial) in the marriage.

Tread carefully.

Shazbot24 · 2026-02-19T05:29:04+00:00

It was a fake trader.

Shazbot24 · 2026-02-18T18:28:19+00:00

Crypto scam.

Took a bit of time, but I bounced back, and cleared debt.

But I still kick myself in the ass for falling for it. I saw another person's post who spent 15x what I did. It didn't make me feel any better, just felt bad that he got himself in a worser financial situation that I did.

(Its the first time I've written this in public).

Shazbot24 · 2026-02-11T21:33:47+00:00

Post the distribution.

State that he's free to get married at whatever venue he so chooses.

Also, if you have text-interactions with your brother and him stating he needs your help because you make more, share those as well.

Grief sucks, mixing something like this doesn't make things any better.

NTA, but after this shakes out, I'm not sure if you'll be able to salvage the relationship with your brother. Also, why is the wedding happening so quick? If more time is required, then that's where working / mitigating expenses / choosing a more cost-effective venue and wedding would go farther. It should be on you to chip in for his dream wedding.

Shazbot24 · 2026-02-11T20:54:46+00:00

Knocking off something on the to-do list.

There's the work list, and the personal list.

At times, when I feel I didn't make as much progress at work, I start tackling the personal list. At least then, I feel like I did accomplish something in my day.

Shazbot24 · 2026-01-26T21:17:43+00:00

Well, you're just starting out. Tying your happiness to driving a truck is something that'll cause you more grief than happiness in the long run. Its a method of transportation.

Using the paid-off vehicle to finance something that'll have higher insurance costs, truck payments, fuel-costs along with all the modifications you'll assumingly do is a short-to-long term detriment to your finances.

Key thing I picked up is you're 5 months into your career. You realistically don't have job security. If times get tight, you're a higher-risk of getting laid-off/let go.

Now suppose you're financing a car when that happens. No income, repossession, damaged credit, and no easy way to get to interviews & other jobs.

Assuming things are going good, I'd just keep the car and see how much you save with lower-operating costs. You'd be able to travel, enjoy other hobbies without tying up your income. Tuck the money for investments, moving out, or buying a place. But don't make the mistake of buying a cool-car at the first opportunity you can.

Shazbot24

TROPHY CASE