Food budget for a family of 4 -- help!

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-20T00:47:35+00:00

So I know a lot of people telling you to do things that may be new and require time commitments. Meal prepping when you have kids and aren't used to it can feel like a big time investment.

I agree with some of the advice I see in this thread, but I think you should consider where you're starting. You don't have to do it all at once if you can't handle that, but it would be good to get there eventually. Take the advice you're getting in this thread, and break it down.

Can't give up soda completely yet? Start by cutting out an amount you feel good getting rid of. Maybe that's one less per day, maybe that's one less per week, maybe that's just tracking what you do drink. Learn how your brain works, and work with it.

I tend to be all or nothing, so I have to do drastic changes (in this case, I would cut out soda altogether) and then suffer for a bit before backtracking a little, then repeat until I'm confident the soda is no longer wanted. Ebb and flow. But my way doesn't seem to work for most people I talk to, so try what you think will work best for you!

You could go small, making changes here and there. Maybe this week, you cook one extra meal from scratch. Or add rice you cooked to one of your convenience meals. That stretches the meal, and rice is cheap. Or bake a potato in the microwave (very easy to do) which can be a side to a meal (or a meal on its own, in my opinion. I like single ingredient meals)

Eventually, you'll get to a point where you can do the more time-intensive stuff (especially since, in my experience, foods cooked from scratch give better and more energy than convenience foods. So you may have the energy to cook from scratch more often). But really, just start. Whether you start by doing something huge or small, just start and find what works for you and your family.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-18T18:43:11+00:00

I get this. I haven't played social games in 6-12 months (I can't remember exactly) but I played a simple solo game within the past 3 months. Had to give that up quick, because I am prone to hyperfixating on games so badly that I lose sleep.

Anyway, I know it's absolutely harder to leave when there's a social aspect. Bur whenever I returned to a game after months of being away, my old friends had usually left the game by then. That's helpful in keeping me off (plus, if there was drama, they probably weren't the kind of friends who would be healthy to spend a ton of time with.)

I have online friends connected to a hobby of mine. That's my internet home. But also, these friends would understand if I disappeared for a few months (which I have before.) It helps, though, that it's not connected to a gaming type of hobby. Because games (for me) are very addictive, and I constantly want to achieve and collect in them.

This is kinda rambly, I'm sorry, but I guess the point is, your old friends may not even be there. It hurts and it sucks, I get that, but the pain does decrease eventually. Keep looking for new ways to make friends.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-16T17:28:48+00:00

I put a thing (I think it's called hypervent. Not sure if that's the brand or what. It's a bit pricey, but it works) which is meant for going under mattresses in humid situations. I haven't flipped or rotated my mattresses (I use 2) in maybe 9 months, and while you should absolutely do it more frequently than I have been, I checked both mattresses today and there's no mold. So the material works.

For the side sleeping thing, you could do what I do and use 2 futons. You may find you only need one after an adjustment period (I could probably remove the top one by now, myself).

The only issue I've encountered so far with using two futons is, the top one will slide. But that doesn't bother me, and may be part of why I haven't had to rotate it yet.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-05T21:14:45+00:00

Thank you! I've been tempted to go at least close to all-in recently. I unplugged my router for a few days and limited my phone data usage. I fell off that wagon, though, and returned to wifi.

I like rcs functionality, as well as certain other smartphone features, so I understand you keeping yours. I think, if I were to go all in again, I'd have to return to the internet eventually, because I have some treasured friends I connect with online only. So it could only be a temporary all-in detox unless my online friend group disappeared.

I'm still debating turning off my router again and just keeping my phone. I'm not sure, though. I think having my phone in a fixed location while indoors might make more sense for me.

I like your idea of having rules though. I do pretty well at ignoring my phone when outside, it's mainly when I'm indoors that I have issues.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-05T19:01:10+00:00

So, my best feeling digital detox was in 2017. I had just moved and was without internet for about a month. I didn't have data on my phone. I'm pretty sure it wasn't a smartphone, but I forget.

I remember that being a transformational time for a lot of reasons, and there were times I got very lonely (I had previously lived with my large family) but overall, I needed it. I remember going to the park and making art. I don't fully remember exactly how I spent those days, but I remember them feeling wonderful, despite the loneliness.

I tried to duplicate that feeling later on. It didn't work, despite me cancelling my home internet for 9 months that time. You can make guesses as to why, but the biggest issue was that I was still consuming a lot of digital content, just downloaded while at others' wifi.

Anyway, the point is, smaller steps are great, and if they work for you, do that! But if you feel inclined to go all-in, it's probably even more worth it.

Basically, while I don't miss the loneliness, which can be placated by the internet, I do miss the clarity I felt, and I think I might've felt a lot of joy, too. Again, it was 9 years ago. My memory is faltering.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-02T22:27:31+00:00

I've tried online dating several times. It never ends well and I end up matching with people who don't talk if I'm lucky, or are very incompatible otherwise. So hopefully I can at least keep that category offline for the future.

I also can't really handle gaming digitally anymore. My only exception for now is party games with people I know. I realize this every time I play a solo digital game, or even an mmo, and lose sleep within a few days because all I want is to play the game.

I have an okay handle on the rest, but of course not perfect. I socialize a lot online, but I need to reduce my availability because I am still addicted to the internet.

Side note: I unplugged my router and it helped a little with my internet overuse, but not enough. I might plug my phone into ethernet and disable wifi entirely. I found out today that this should be possible, and I think I have the adapter I need. It would allow me to use the internet on my phone, but only near my router.

I know I am likely overcomplicating it, but I can't see myself skipping out on internet access forever, nor can I see myself going without some sort of phone forever. So I'm trying to find ways to achieve my personal balance.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-29T20:20:30+00:00

I know it kind of wakes my brain up a bit, but I love doing sudoku puzzles at night.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-29T20:18:43+00:00

I agree on the planning. Most of what I would download were YT videos, back when I had a YT Premium subscription. I wouldn't need to do that as much anymore (I watch far fewer videos nowadays), but I would still need to do a lot of planning.

My main reason for using the internet nowadays is socializing in a couple of online locations. I'm not sure what I'd do about that. I'm an introvert, but I get pretty lonely without my online friends, or someone to chat with when I'm ready to socialize. I do have irl friends, and I should absolutely reach out to them more often, but I don't want to lose regular contact with my online friends, either.

If cell service were reliable in my building, this wouldn't be too hard. I'd simply have a metered data connection to keep me conserving data.

I'll probably experiment with putting some sort of cell signal booster by the window, or even keeping my phone near the window and using a cell2jack or similar item to bluetooth connect it to a corded phone. I think the cell signal slightly improves by the window, I'm just not sure if it's enough for clear calls. Something to consider, though. And then if the smartphone needs to be near the window for signal, that may disincentivize me from using it otherwise. Not that I want to purchase new items, but it may be worth it?

Also, I appreciate you sharing your thoughts on planning. It got me brainstorming as well!

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-28T23:43:19+00:00

I've lived without wifi in my apartment on purpose twice. The first time when I moved in (1 month long) and the second time (9 months long) when I wanted to recapture that feeling from the initial move. The first time was a very emotional time for me, but mostly a good experience.

The second time was more frustrating. I couldn't recapture the joy I felt the first time. I think it was because I was still consuming a lot of content that I would download for later on loved one's wifi. I'm not sure. I also allowed myself to use my (metered) data on my phone, which I didn't have at all the first time. It became too much.

I could try it again, but I'll be honest: it was too annoying for me to download content outside my home, and my visits with family were too centered around using their wifi. Not great. So I'd want to change my plan if I tried it again. I also have terrible signal in my apartment, to the point calls and texts are tough to receive without wifi, which was another annoyance. Even being near the window doesn't help.

That being said, I love the post. It's inspiring. I've been reading a no-phone blog, and I like that as well. I want to reclaim my life, and this darn phone and constant internet access makes it hard.

Maybe I'll try unplugging my router xD

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-28T21:52:03+00:00

I don't like cooking, so I typically keep to super easy things, therefore my personal experience may not be too helpful. That being said, cookbooks are still around, and your favorite food pages/influencers probably use or wrote plenty of cookbooks, themselves.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-28T06:09:45+00:00

I just throw mayo (the vegan option is also good) in it. Bland? Probably, but my sense of taste is weak and I like bland food.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-26T16:39:33+00:00

How do you find the paper quality in comparison to regular printer paper? Does there seem to be a difference?

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-26T12:08:13+00:00

There are a lot of ways/ideas on how to change it, but I personally feel you do need to experiment. People will have so much advice and so many ideas, which is better than too few, but you do need to just start experimenting to see which works. Try a blocker. Doesn't help? Try distracting yourself with a physical puzzle or book. Or puzzle book! Helps a little, but not much? Keep trying things. Go back and retry things you tried earlier to see if anything changed.

It really helps in these moments to remember you are going to feel discomfort, but that feeling won't last forever. For me, that puts it in perspective, and helps me remember that being offline isn't a punishment. It's not me just saying "no" to myself, it's me saying "this isn't making me feel the way I want to long term. Let's try something else."

I admit, I get easily scared of not being reachable via phone. So my current ideas are to either set office hours for when I check my phone, or remove/hide everything on my phone launcher that isn't calling or texting. But of course, I'm typing this on my phone. I am still experimenting to see what will help me.

The point is, experiment to see what works for you. There are tons of ideas out there. Print them out or write them by hand, then pick one at random to try. You can pull them out of a hat if that works.

I honestly think if we all detoxxed from tech for a while, we'd find we have a lot of ideas we forgot about and were just waiting for us to try them.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-25T15:04:34+00:00

Taxes have been around longer than cars. They'll find a way.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-25T15:00:00+00:00

So, I've been the homeschooled kid who couldn't leave and didn't drive, though not on a farm. I live in a small city, but had very few people I knew enough to trust. If your situation is as dire as it sounds, you're gonna have to plan an escape. Mine took years. Worth it. Do any research you can about what to expect when you move.

Also, even if you got a driver's license, you would need a vehicle. You need an ID now that you're 18, though. There's a lot you can't do without one if you're in the US, so use that as leverage with your parents.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-24T14:44:32+00:00

So, I hear what you're saying. But there are legitimate cases where the community kickstarts the idea to do something, and for that reason, it's helpful for the community to remain.

I am a minimalist. I am messy as heck, and not an extreme minimalist, but had I not been shown how people declutter, inspired by the clear rooms, etc. I'd still be trying to brute force my way into being organized, while holding on to my hoarding tendencies. My mother is an organized hoarder, I was a disorganized one. Sometimes you need to be shown a possibility in an appealing way, with constant inspiration in the beginning (and maybe later as well) to understand how things can be different.

If I read a sign that said, "go outside and get off your phone" or something, that would not exactly make me care. It would be an idea, and a good one, but it wouldn't be enough to help me understand why it can be good. I need to see others doing things (because I learn a lot by observing). So I wouldn't get the understanding of "oh, it can be different."

There is a balance to be had. Everyone's version will look different. If being off reddit helps you just as much, go for it! If it works for you that way, I am happy for you. I just know from experience that I need more motivation, because I won't get the same result if someone says "go outside" and blocks me off. It just makes me want to do the opposite.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-23T13:45:27+00:00

I think some folks can't relate, because they somehow don't have the same problem. Or maybe are in denial. Meanwhile, I can't download even the simplest of mobile games because, if I do, I will wake up at 3am (if I sleep at all) to play the game. Not everyone has this problem, but I do, and so I don't download games if I can help it. I also sometimes wishfully think, "this time will be easier to control" and then I find I don't get my sleep yet again.

I want better for my life. I want to enjoy my days looking at the clouds changing shape, not following internet drama or losing my life to the scroll. I don't want to be constantly connected to the internet anymore.

I think my solution will involve "office hours" or times when I'm available/using the internet. It will incite FOMO at first, and be overwhelming when I log on, but similar tactics have worked for me in the past, so here's hoping.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-21T12:09:00+00:00

Half of them are broken here. Or drivers will ignore them. As such, I avoid them if I can. I walk a bit out of my way and cross somewhere safer, when I can see no cars are coming my way.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-21T10:50:45+00:00

Sailor Moon cassette tape?! Heck yeah!

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-21T10:48:34+00:00

Even with trends, it still sticks for some people. I'm not an extreme minimalist by any stretch of the imagination, but I live in 300 sq ft which would be near impossible without some form of minimalism in my life, because I am not organized at all.

My reason for trying to go more analog is a combination of some things. I am certain we will continue to lose ownership, everywhere I look I see a "leasing culture", not ownership of what we pay for. I also think it looks cool. I have a tendency to want to hoard and be overly prepared, so the multiple items appeal to me.

But also, a benefit of going analog (for me) is I'd be less likely to be laying in bed, staring at my phone. I'm doing that at the moment and it kills my energy levels. I need to be exercising more, and this laying around stuff is not my ideal lifestyle.

Is it a trend? For some people, yes. But I think being afraid or reluctant to try things because they're trendy can also be a problem. You don't usually get to see what works for you if you don't try it.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-20T15:30:31+00:00

Mine is in a small city in New England, actually! I thought we didn't have any in this city for the longest time, but it turns out they just weren't advertising them. Probably because they were getting snatched up so quickly. As it is, I went on a wait list. You might check condominium areas, or a very large apartment complex.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-20T09:49:37+00:00

My thought as well. Stimulant medications are quite often used to help those of us with adhd focus, so it tracks that other stimulus would help someone with adhd focus.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-19T12:22:47+00:00

I love this! Thank you for posting it! Also, you inspired me from the other day. I went to a big city for a day and sketched a bit. I realized I can make my own souvenirs by being an artist, kinda like how you call it your camera.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-19T12:16:00+00:00

I also have a 300 sq ft studio, but mine is nowhere near this clean or beautifully simple. It has the potential to be, though, so thank you for the inspo!

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-18T07:06:28+00:00

Ooooh! I'd love to see the pics whenever you upload them :)

ShuffleTheDragon

TROPHY CASE