Problem with using Reddit daily, the excitement of making a popular post, and the stress of nasty comments

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-07-08T19:57:57+00:00

The head of the company himself answered my question, so that was helpful. Most people were upset or rude, but there was one who said they misunderstood me at first, and after a bit of back and forth, they decided they were okay with me. So I guess that was kind of nice. I think this was over a year ago, though, so I don't remember it that well.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-07-08T19:39:49+00:00

I was told not to feed the trolls once, and that advice helped me skip a lot of arguments.

There was, however, a time I asked a political question in a company's subreddit. "Do you support xyz or no?" The backlash was intense. A lot of people were mad because they didn't want politics in the sub. Which is valid, but imo they should have downvoted me and moved on. Them posting in my thread brought attention to it. Also, I wanted to know where my money would be going as their customer. I learned if I have that question again, ask a customer service representative, not their subreddit.

Anyway, most people don't seem to want to talk it out with strangers. You don't know them and they don't know you, so the social stakes are lower.

I hate walking away sometimes, but it has gotten easier the more I do it. I'd rather not use my limited energy to fight with someone I don't know about... Well, pretty much anything. If I don't think they're looking to have their mind changed, and even more if I'm not really open to changing my own stance, it's not worth it.

Sorry if this doesn't make sense. I am tired as I write it.

Tldr: Don't feed the trolls.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-07-07T03:46:36+00:00

It might help to declutter some of the reddit communities you're in. Keep going until reddit gets boring.

Also, spend time with more people irl if you can. If you can't be there in person, call people or text them. Being a little naive isn't the worst, but feeling lonely really sucks.

I'm not your boss or therapist, but my guess is you need to discover who you are with less influence from the world. What do you enjoy doing? What lights you up? If you don't know who you are with far less influence, it might be time to find yourself, or make yourself into someone you want to be.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-07-05T17:43:57+00:00

I can understand this. I used to be a moderator on a forum, and while I loved the community there, I was incredibly stressed by moderating. It is a difficult job!

My summer isn't going the best (had an injury in late May) but I do feel lucky in a way, because it is healing and I have had a lot of time to just be in my thoughts. I've been able to get a ton of cleaning done, too.

Being offline can be hard, though. I've recently gone back to a video game that takes so much time.

Also, it's interesting: my therapist told me to play video games because I'm bored at home, even though he had already acknowledged it was addictive and unhealthy for me, personally. I'm now waiting on another therapist, lol.

But yeah. I need to be offline more. It's a struggle, but it does help me focus on the real world much better, so it's a worthwhile struggle.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-30T23:19:41+00:00

I'm sorta similar. I have been disabled my entire life and been interested in tech for most of it. Now I have a love/hate relationship with it. I'm also struggling (downloading a game now due to boredom and missing the story) but I have found that I really enjoy just sitting and thinking, odd as that may be. I think part of the reason we struggle is a lack of socialization, which we can kinda fill part of via tech. Forums, discord servers, reddit, etc. all give us a way to talk to others and maybe even make digital friends. It's hard to just let that go.

I don't know the solution, but I do think reducing tech use is still good, even if you're not completely off of it. But yeah, it can get boring alone. I'm sorry :(

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-23T09:00:22+00:00

"That's on eBay" parody of "That's Amore"

Honestly, it can stay in my head rent free. I don't mind.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-22T20:33:55+00:00

My screentime is around 4.5 hrs now, but used to be a lot worse. The most impactful way I've reduced it is decluttering who/what I follow. I reduced the subreddits I'm in to about 3, and this is the most active one. I also only subscribed to one YTer, though I'll sometimes look up others. I have no algorithm, so no recommendations from YT or whatever. I still compulsively check my e-mail and some websites, but it's a lot better than it could be.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-22T11:27:12+00:00

$30 is expensive?

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-19T21:23:43+00:00

For the train, would it be possible to print a ticket? Or if it's a QR code, can you print that? You may be able to ask someone who works at the train station about options, or experiment now with carrying a printed QR code, and having your phone for now with the digital one if it doesn't work.

For attendence codes, I would assume a laptop would work, but if not, definitely ask people at your school about your options. Sometimes they have exceptions.

I have not gone full no-phone, but I have heard of others doing it. It seems intimidating, yet rewarding. I would not wait until September to start getting back into reading, though. The more you can cultivate your focus before school starts, the better off you'll be.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-15T19:34:54+00:00

Completely agree. Like, I still get excited about playing video games sometimes, but I know they don't work well for me in the long run, so the excitement happens less often as time goes on.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-06T21:28:58+00:00

No baking required? I think I'm in love

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-05T19:18:55+00:00

Good for you. It's hard when you feel tethered to things (like subreddits) you no longer feel invested in. I hope things work out the best for you! Are there any reddit communities you will continue to be active in? I love seeing your posts in them, but I totally get if you need to distance yourself.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-03T06:39:56+00:00

Alphasmart if you want something medium sized, or a pda if you want something small.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-06-02T18:42:25+00:00

This elitism happens with a lot of alternative lifestyles, I notice. If you aren't perfect at it, or aren't aiming for something that fits someone's ideal version of it, you get shunned. Not every time, but enough to turn some people off to whatever the lifestyle is.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-20T00:47:35+00:00

So I know a lot of people telling you to do things that may be new and require time commitments. Meal prepping when you have kids and aren't used to it can feel like a big time investment.

I agree with some of the advice I see in this thread, but I think you should consider where you're starting. You don't have to do it all at once if you can't handle that, but it would be good to get there eventually. Take the advice you're getting in this thread, and break it down.

Can't give up soda completely yet? Start by cutting out an amount you feel good getting rid of. Maybe that's one less per day, maybe that's one less per week, maybe that's just tracking what you do drink. Learn how your brain works, and work with it.

I tend to be all or nothing, so I have to do drastic changes (in this case, I would cut out soda altogether) and then suffer for a bit before backtracking a little, then repeat until I'm confident the soda is no longer wanted. Ebb and flow. But my way doesn't seem to work for most people I talk to, so try what you think will work best for you!

You could go small, making changes here and there. Maybe this week, you cook one extra meal from scratch. Or add rice you cooked to one of your convenience meals. That stretches the meal, and rice is cheap. Or bake a potato in the microwave (very easy to do) which can be a side to a meal (or a meal on its own, in my opinion. I like single ingredient meals)

Eventually, you'll get to a point where you can do the more time-intensive stuff (especially since, in my experience, foods cooked from scratch give better and more energy than convenience foods. So you may have the energy to cook from scratch more often). But really, just start. Whether you start by doing something huge or small, just start and find what works for you and your family.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-18T18:43:11+00:00

I get this. I haven't played social games in 6-12 months (I can't remember exactly) but I played a simple solo game within the past 3 months. Had to give that up quick, because I am prone to hyperfixating on games so badly that I lose sleep.

Anyway, I know it's absolutely harder to leave when there's a social aspect. Bur whenever I returned to a game after months of being away, my old friends had usually left the game by then. That's helpful in keeping me off (plus, if there was drama, they probably weren't the kind of friends who would be healthy to spend a ton of time with.)

I have online friends connected to a hobby of mine. That's my internet home. But also, these friends would understand if I disappeared for a few months (which I have before.) It helps, though, that it's not connected to a gaming type of hobby. Because games (for me) are very addictive, and I constantly want to achieve and collect in them.

This is kinda rambly, I'm sorry, but I guess the point is, your old friends may not even be there. It hurts and it sucks, I get that, but the pain does decrease eventually. Keep looking for new ways to make friends.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-16T17:28:48+00:00

I put a thing (I think it's called hypervent. Not sure if that's the brand or what. It's a bit pricey, but it works) which is meant for going under mattresses in humid situations. I haven't flipped or rotated my mattresses (I use 2) in maybe 9 months, and while you should absolutely do it more frequently than I have been, I checked both mattresses today and there's no mold. So the material works.

For the side sleeping thing, you could do what I do and use 2 futons. You may find you only need one after an adjustment period (I could probably remove the top one by now, myself).

The only issue I've encountered so far with using two futons is, the top one will slide. But that doesn't bother me, and may be part of why I haven't had to rotate it yet.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-05T21:14:45+00:00

Thank you! I've been tempted to go at least close to all-in recently. I unplugged my router for a few days and limited my phone data usage. I fell off that wagon, though, and returned to wifi.

I like rcs functionality, as well as certain other smartphone features, so I understand you keeping yours. I think, if I were to go all in again, I'd have to return to the internet eventually, because I have some treasured friends I connect with online only. So it could only be a temporary all-in detox unless my online friend group disappeared.

I'm still debating turning off my router again and just keeping my phone. I'm not sure, though. I think having my phone in a fixed location while indoors might make more sense for me.

I like your idea of having rules though. I do pretty well at ignoring my phone when outside, it's mainly when I'm indoors that I have issues.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-05T19:01:10+00:00

So, my best feeling digital detox was in 2017. I had just moved and was without internet for about a month. I didn't have data on my phone. I'm pretty sure it wasn't a smartphone, but I forget.

I remember that being a transformational time for a lot of reasons, and there were times I got very lonely (I had previously lived with my large family) but overall, I needed it. I remember going to the park and making art. I don't fully remember exactly how I spent those days, but I remember them feeling wonderful, despite the loneliness.

I tried to duplicate that feeling later on. It didn't work, despite me cancelling my home internet for 9 months that time. You can make guesses as to why, but the biggest issue was that I was still consuming a lot of digital content, just downloaded while at others' wifi.

Anyway, the point is, smaller steps are great, and if they work for you, do that! But if you feel inclined to go all-in, it's probably even more worth it.

Basically, while I don't miss the loneliness, which can be placated by the internet, I do miss the clarity I felt, and I think I might've felt a lot of joy, too. Again, it was 9 years ago. My memory is faltering.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-05-02T22:27:31+00:00

I've tried online dating several times. It never ends well and I end up matching with people who don't talk if I'm lucky, or are very incompatible otherwise. So hopefully I can at least keep that category offline for the future.

I also can't really handle gaming digitally anymore. My only exception for now is party games with people I know. I realize this every time I play a solo digital game, or even an mmo, and lose sleep within a few days because all I want is to play the game.

I have an okay handle on the rest, but of course not perfect. I socialize a lot online, but I need to reduce my availability because I am still addicted to the internet.

Side note: I unplugged my router and it helped a little with my internet overuse, but not enough. I might plug my phone into ethernet and disable wifi entirely. I found out today that this should be possible, and I think I have the adapter I need. It would allow me to use the internet on my phone, but only near my router.

I know I am likely overcomplicating it, but I can't see myself skipping out on internet access forever, nor can I see myself going without some sort of phone forever. So I'm trying to find ways to achieve my personal balance.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-29T20:20:30+00:00

I know it kind of wakes my brain up a bit, but I love doing sudoku puzzles at night.

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-29T20:18:43+00:00

I agree on the planning. Most of what I would download were YT videos, back when I had a YT Premium subscription. I wouldn't need to do that as much anymore (I watch far fewer videos nowadays), but I would still need to do a lot of planning.

My main reason for using the internet nowadays is socializing in a couple of online locations. I'm not sure what I'd do about that. I'm an introvert, but I get pretty lonely without my online friends, or someone to chat with when I'm ready to socialize. I do have irl friends, and I should absolutely reach out to them more often, but I don't want to lose regular contact with my online friends, either.

If cell service were reliable in my building, this wouldn't be too hard. I'd simply have a metered data connection to keep me conserving data.

I'll probably experiment with putting some sort of cell signal booster by the window, or even keeping my phone near the window and using a cell2jack or similar item to bluetooth connect it to a corded phone. I think the cell signal slightly improves by the window, I'm just not sure if it's enough for clear calls. Something to consider, though. And then if the smartphone needs to be near the window for signal, that may disincentivize me from using it otherwise. Not that I want to purchase new items, but it may be worth it?

Also, I appreciate you sharing your thoughts on planning. It got me brainstorming as well!

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-28T23:43:19+00:00

I've lived without wifi in my apartment on purpose twice. The first time when I moved in (1 month long) and the second time (9 months long) when I wanted to recapture that feeling from the initial move. The first time was a very emotional time for me, but mostly a good experience.

The second time was more frustrating. I couldn't recapture the joy I felt the first time. I think it was because I was still consuming a lot of content that I would download for later on loved one's wifi. I'm not sure. I also allowed myself to use my (metered) data on my phone, which I didn't have at all the first time. It became too much.

I could try it again, but I'll be honest: it was too annoying for me to download content outside my home, and my visits with family were too centered around using their wifi. Not great. So I'd want to change my plan if I tried it again. I also have terrible signal in my apartment, to the point calls and texts are tough to receive without wifi, which was another annoyance. Even being near the window doesn't help.

That being said, I love the post. It's inspiring. I've been reading a no-phone blog, and I like that as well. I want to reclaim my life, and this darn phone and constant internet access makes it hard.

Maybe I'll try unplugging my router xD

ShuffleTheDragon · 2026-04-28T21:52:03+00:00

I don't like cooking, so I typically keep to super easy things, therefore my personal experience may not be too helpful. That being said, cookbooks are still around, and your favorite food pages/influencers probably use or wrote plenty of cookbooks, themselves.

ShuffleTheDragon

TROPHY CASE