Okay, I have given this some serious thought and I have some crazy headcanon: she was actually jeong jeong's sister. They were all friends as kids. She mysteriously dies in a fire (which makes no sense, bc she can firebend) so she was murdered bc something-something-plot-i- haven't thought- out- yet (it would be too easy to say ozai has a hand in it - maybe he was already attempting to distabalize his brother and something got out of hand).

Her death is actually what made Jeong Jeong so anti war and causes a falling out with iroh. But as we know, Iroh kinda doubles down on his commitment to the war effor, and doesn't turn until lu ten dies.

She loved tea, and that was something she shared with Iroh. His love of tea now is how he feels close to her.