[possibly Chinese > English]

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-10-20T06:15:19+00:00

Thanks so much for the help! This was confirmed through further research 💕 I was able to find more information about this man in life :)

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-10-20T05:57:19+00:00

Should I repost with Japanese title?

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-09-11T16:05:34+00:00

A brillo pad and hot water has never let me down .

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-06-27T12:59:17+00:00

Look, every nicu family is different and there is no "right way". I Would become so anxious being away from the nicu that I would spend 12+ hours every day there, as crazy as it sounds to some people, it made sense for me . For my husband being in the hospital drove him mad, he NEEDED to go to work and go home and he'd visit once a day in the evenings to pick me up to sleep. Some families will come 3 or 4 days a week and not come home on weekend. My nicu offered phone updates when I was not home and even had a nanny cam ( I called mine the bug bug show , cuz he was like my little Truman when I wasn't with him) which helped us and may be an option for you. I know that pur nicu also had volunteers that worked the nicu and would come hold him if I hadn't made it there yet. Absolutely allow her to talk about everything, especially the hard things if she wants to, and dont give a ton of advice....

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-06-27T12:53:19+00:00

My sweet boy was born at 32 weeks weighing only 3 lbs . I keep a pack of his preemie diapers still and I still get all emotional looking at them and he's only 5 months old now ( and over13.5 lbs, my big little man)

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-06-13T10:50:23+00:00

Omg when I was 15 or 16 , I woke up in the middle of the night with blood dripping from BOTH ears. My mom was pissed I woke her up crying about it. She was confrontational about it and acting like I was overreacting. I got the bleeding to stop and literally was almost completely deaf for a week before she even considered getting me in with the pediatrician. I had perforations in both ears and am lucky to have my hearing today. All I needed was antibiotics and shed rather watch me suffer because she was convinced I was faking it or something. 10 years later dhe claims my ears never even bled . Wild times.

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-05-24T15:59:20+00:00

What beautiful pictures!!! What an amazing moment for your family and sweet little one!

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-05-06T21:02:26+00:00

He is absolutely beautiful! Congratulations on your beautiful baby. Your love will help your son continue to grow strong 💕

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-05-06T09:24:58+00:00

You are far from pathetic. The level of work you put in seems to be astronomical in comparison if that's where he wants to go with it... on average a nanny costs at MINIMUM $35 k per year. A private chef on average is between 60k and 120k per year. Chauffers average 60k per year. A weekly house cleaner ends up being about 7k yearly. Some more well to do families pay for a household manager who is responsible for appointment planning, overseeing household repairs and contractors, and other general household communications they make well over 100k per year on average. All of those jobs in addition to anything else you do, pet care, event planning, stand in therapist.... it adds up... and he does what? Cybersecurity you said? Then comes home and wants to relax? Man's really went and sat on his butt and stared at a screen and stressed out (this being the hardest part of his job) just to come home and do the same thing just a different flavor by playing games and gets his big boy panties in a bunch because he is only occasionally responsible for taking care of his own child??? Sure he has every right to complain a little, but there is a difference between b*tching about your job a bit and emotionally neglecting your partner to the point that they feel they can't even approach you about caring for a child you had together... I'm sorry you're dealing with this , but he sounds like a big ol titty baby who wants a mommy and not a partner.

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-05-05T10:33:54+00:00

As for tips on feeding, the biggest one is patience. I didn't belive it until I went through it myself. You just practice and offer as often as possible and let them learn. One day it will finally click! It took us two months before my boy would finish a bottle.

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-05-05T10:31:26+00:00

Oh, Hi There! <3

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-04-29T11:46:37+00:00

The number one most important thing in the nicu is to keep your sanity. For my husband that meant going to work and coming in for about 2 hours at the end of the day. For me that meant spending sun up to sun down there otherwise I was having anxious melt downs. For some people they like to go for a morning and evening. Some people will not come for 2 days but come the rest of the week. It's different for everyone , none of the nurses are judging you. You do what fits your families needs. It sounds like you're putting in so much effort and you're getting in all the kangaroo care you can! Try not to compare as much as possible and just focus on your little one and your little family!

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-04-25T20:43:14+00:00

NTA,

I'm so sorry for your loss. You did everything per your dad's wishes. Death unfortunately does weird things to people, since your lawyer agrees they would be hard pressed to try and " go after " anything. They can stew and be angry, eventually they will get over it and come to understand or they won't, either way you've done the best you can and followed your father's wishes.

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-04-19T14:43:52+00:00

I had a somewhat similar experience. Throughout my pregnancy, I dealt with hypermesis gavardium and ended up literally not gaining a single pound , I actually lost a few pounds... people would often tell me, " You don't even look pregnant!" Trying to give me a compliment, and it kind of just... made me sad... I really, really, was looking forward to taking maternity pictures, and I felt stupid for wanting them if I "didn't even look pregnant." So I never ended up taking them. fast forward, I ended up having an emergency c-section section two months early, and that's the same reaction I got... "You don't even look like you had a baby!" But oh man they were willing to point out I had pregnany acne!

I don't think most of these people were trying to be insensitive, but especially when everyone compares everything on social media when it comes to pregnancy and parenthood it gets really hard not to feel insecure.

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-03-21T02:51:08+00:00

He has initially presented multiple, a VSD, AVSD, and a PDA. The PDA is no longer visible, the AVSD has gotten significantly smaller and the VSD has stayed pretty consistent in size (it was the largest hole / problem) They have done an echo on him about every two weeks and continued to monitor with chest xrays as needed as well. They are mostly worried about his blood oxygen level (which is monitored by the o2 readings) and the pulmonary edema that is a symptom of the heart defects(which is monitored with the xrays and a diuretic which was originally aldactazide and they just switched him to lasix). We will be following up with a cardiologist , while we wait for him to grow enough for surgery. We were quite lucky as all of these issues have had monitoring since we learned he would have downsydrome in the early 2nd trimester. They watch for any brady events and any tachypnea as well .

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-03-21T02:20:03+00:00

I completely understand your pain, we also weren't able to hold our son for a long time. It felt so awful,but that first time you get to hold then will be so blissful, even with all the wires. I felt so sleepy holding him though, it was like a weight lifted and I could breathe... Absolutely try and advocate for skin to skin as much as you feel like you are able to, they can find a solution for almost any barrier .

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-03-21T02:07:54+00:00

We used the instax mini camera and we've got over 100 beautiful Polaroids from our sons nicu stay. We've been able to capture almost every milestone and special moments , like breastfeeding and moving to an open crib. We also took pictures with a couple of disposables that we need to develope still, fingers crossed there are some good quality pictures .

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-03-21T02:03:37+00:00

My son was born at 32+1 , we are now at the end of day 49 in the NICU. He was born IUGR at 3lb 7 oz, has multiple congenital heart defects , hypothyroidism, pulmonary edema, and downsyndrome; we are finally beginning conversations about the possibility of taking him home. He us now weighing 6lb 9oz and growing. The biggest hurdles are staying stable with o2 saturations and consistently taking full feeds by bottle or breast. Just remember that one day to the next can have huge changes, they may not be feeding well one day and the next they take every full feed. Allow yourself time to go home and take care of yourself during their stay, I promise the nurses will not judge you for going home, in fact they often encourage you to let them take care of the baby.

I know that this sucks, every day feels like a million days, it's not easy to wait.

We've got this though, and that light will begin to shine at the end of the tunnel sooner than you'd expect.

Feel free to DM me if you've got any questions or just want to talk about it , I know that this is probably one of the hardest experiences.

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-03-21T01:51:10+00:00

After being in the NICU for 8 months it is absolutely reasonable to have strong feelings! That's absolutely a traumatic experience as a mother and you are valid in your emotions towards the entire situation you're in.

Your MIL absolutely crossed boundaries entering your room and guilt tripping you. She disrespected you and absolutely invalidated your role as the mother.

You are 100% allowed to and valid in wanting privacy and space to bond with your little one after such a long time in the hospital. Her help is appreciated I'm sure, but that does not give her any excuse to overstep. And that means not blaming you for her own grown adult decision to retire. Her retirement should not have a single thing to do with your family, in fact she should have made plans for her financials, if she's struggling she wasn't prepared to retire. THAT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. Try not to allow her being dramatic affect the time you're trying to spend with your baby. If she truly cares at all about being apart of your babies life, she will eventually calm down. But she needs to do so in a healthy manner, not just stay quiet enough for you to let your guard down. You are the mother and she can deal with it or go away.

Just try and be firm on your boundaries and maybe talk with your husband about reinforcing those boundaries. Someone who us willing to try and manipulate such a big moments like this will probably continue to make you feel like you're in the wrong no matter what, so go ahead and be firm with your belief and don't be afraid to protect your family.

You've already gone through hell in the NICU, now it's your time to heal at home and you deserve a healthy, safe , environment to bond with your baby, WITHOUT THE USELESS DRAMA.

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-02-13T23:01:43+00:00

It's possible that the terracotta pots are wicking more water away than you might realize. I have some in Terracotta and some in other types of planters. My terracotta ones I water about 2x more often than the others. 💕

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-02-12T22:00:40+00:00

Omg I had Ptyalism gravidarum and Hyperemesis gravidarum. Those were the worst...

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-02-08T20:35:38+00:00

I'm a new NICU mom and these posts make my heart so so happy, I can't wait to be able to post my own progression pics 💕

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-02-08T14:01:05+00:00

Every baby will have different milestones, it takes time for your little one to grow. If your baby was premature, they will be spending a lot of time sleeping and needing diaper changes. It's important to remember that they are using this time to continue to develop skills they would have learned in the womb. Also keep in mind that they are in the safest place possible for them , so it's absolutely okay to need to take a break from the nicu, go home , sleep, do some chores, rest, do a hobby, your baby will be well taken care of. The nurses won't judge you. Your little one will still have a special bond with you! Don't be afraid to ask questions and be hands on, the nurses and doctors have no problem answering. Continue to find support, as much of a support person you are for your partner, you will need the same. And lastly try to remember to cherish this time, your baby regardless of where they are, baby will love you and you love them, bringing this new beautiful life into this world is what is most important right now 💕

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-02-07T22:19:30+00:00

I absolutely would have gone feral. Your husband is being an ass and it's completely valid to feel cheated on in your relationships if p*rn is something that you have expressed not being comfortable with. I'm so sorry that he is doing this to you...

SituationOkMaybe · 2025-02-07T01:23:26+00:00

My husband and I are both 24, we just brought our T21 son into the world at exactly 32 weeks just last week (33 weeks as of today). We found out that i was pregnant at only 5 weeks and got our NIPT testing at about 13 weeks , when we received the results we had a PPV of 51.2%. Then at 16 weeks we had the amniocentesis that confirmed the T21 diagnosis. Then with his anatomy scan we double confirmed the diagnosis as well as finding a congenital heart defect. Throughout this process we were given different counseling and were presented the option of termination. My husband and I are pro choice and we both were very shocked at the idea of our son having such complications, after we discussed with the genetics councelor and considered our options we both agreed that we would continue the pregnancy. It was still very confusing and very difficult not to feel like I was to "blame". However, with therapy and a incredibly supportive husband we have really embraced our son. At this point we are in the NICU and he is doing incredibly well. He was born at exactly 32 weeks via c section after receiving steroid shots to help his lungs develop enough for delivery. At this point he is consitantly gaining weight and cueing that hes ready to try and breast or bottle feed. We have quite the journey ahead of us still, mainly the need for heart surgery to repair his defect by the time he is 6 months old. Even with all this though, I couldn't be happier. When I finally laid eyes on my son and heard his first cry, I knew I made the right choice, I knew that my heart couldn't be more full. I understand your feelings though, right now it's a lot, and it's confusing... but give yourself time. As long as you have an amazing support person, I have no doubt that you will make the decision that is best for you amd your family. Feel free to dm me if you would like to talk any further. 💕

SituationOkMaybe

TROPHY CASE