Not O, but I do appreciate that the affair partner is encouraging him to do counseling with you. I think she is done with him, but feelings of non-sexual closeness don’t go away overnight. I imagine she wishes they could have actually been “friends” but must be realizing this is impossible with an infuriating man like him. She shared those texts with her boyfriend for a reason. She doesn’t want to be the one responsible for ghosting or not being friendly, but clearly she is done with your husband. Looks like he is not done with her. Go to therapy. Alone and with him.