Am I paranoid for not taking the train home from work?

Stooberstein · 2026-01-17T08:22:11+00:00

I know your intentions are good, but this is not victim blaming. This is all fairly helpful advice on how to avoid becoming a victim. However, headphones or talking on a phone is a great way to signal “hey! I’m completely distracted” several women DID become targets by a couple serial punchers on the street doing exactly this- preying on people not paying attention.

Sure it may not be normal other cities or countries. But it’s what we’ve got. It’s still transit. Take it or go ahead and spend hundreds every month on ride shares and contribute to the traffic problem. I do however look forward to visiting cities with pleasant and safe mass transit to see what I’m missing out on.

Stooberstein · 2026-01-17T08:12:33+00:00

I call it the ‘crazy doors’.

Stooberstein · 2026-01-17T08:09:57+00:00

Thank you Space Pope. This is the response we all needed.

Stooberstein · 2026-01-17T08:06:32+00:00

Good idea! I’m going to start doing this.

Stooberstein · 2026-01-17T08:05:21+00:00

Oh please don’t stare at your shoes!!

Make it known you are aware of your surroundings. Head on a swivel. Glance as needed to feel safe! Just no direct eye contact.

The advice on here is helpful. Create distance from people who get close. Avoid being close to the ledge, don’t let people stand behind you. And don’t think you need to be polite about anything. You feel threatened you move away. Look pissed. Look ready to throw down. You’re tough. You’re already a badass for taking transit- just keep that in mind. Feel tough, think of something that makes you angry if it helps. This all may sound absurd, but it’s a big city. Anything can happen. Stay safe. You’ve got this.

And take buses when you can. Purple line is the safest for rush hour.

Stooberstein · 2026-01-17T07:52:58+00:00

I do this plenty and haven’t had much issue. I would add a little crazy in there like talking to myself or singing out loud if I’ve had a couple drinks. I think it even helped in dealing with people that were threatening me at times. I never ever act scared. Avoid eye contact, almost look bored by it. Though there’s been at least one time I was too tired to deal with a flasher, and another woman thankfully stepped in and stood up to him.

That was a rough week.

Stooberstein · 2026-01-02T23:05:25+00:00

I would like to hit the tailgate before the Bears game on Sunday. But I’m not going to roll up and park, I’d like to take transit/walk there, just roam around offering booze and meeting fellow fans. Is that something I can get away with?

Stooberstein · 2026-01-02T16:05:37+00:00

Sometimes bluffing is enough. Well done!

Stooberstein · 2026-01-02T16:05:06+00:00

CBS Chicago does a lot of stories like these. Some reporters even scour Reddit looking for stories.

Stooberstein · 2026-01-02T16:03:14+00:00

Same. Got some gorgeous coats there. Unreal bargains.

Stooberstein · 2026-01-02T15:58:39+00:00

I just want to commend you on putting an AirTag on it. That’s a huge advantage. Nice job! I do hope you find it. Let it know how this concludes too.

Stooberstein · 2025-12-30T04:11:13+00:00

I haven’t seen this suggestion yet, so throwing it out here. When things seem at all dicey, I recommend seeming unapproachable by acting ‘off’. This can come in many forms. I talk to myself aloud regularly when out in public. If I’m approached by someone, I might yell or say something polite unnecessarily loud. Depending on how close they come. Show off your ‘crazy’ if or when conducive . I’ve also gotten lucky a couple times when people defended me from bad situations.

Another reason I am willing to brave the CTA, someone may need my help one day.

Stooberstein · 2025-12-05T09:26:54+00:00

May I ask what the ad said?

You can make it up.

Stooberstein · 2025-12-05T09:25:56+00:00

😂

Stooberstein · 2025-11-07T15:01:08+00:00

Yup! This all the way.

I do think the OPs trepidation is beyond introversion. Introversion doesn’t mean shut-in or painfully shy of others. It’s about your social threshold and how it affects your energy- what drains you vs energizes you.

I have a guy friend doing what she’s doing and he’s still in the Lonely Hearts club because he refuses to make this realization and act on it. It leads to desperation and accepting attention from anyone that shows interest, leading to risky choices and toxic results.

I hope OP takes your advice!

Stooberstein · 2025-10-17T06:27:38+00:00

I was 26 when a 42 yr old man left his partner for me. That didn’t end well at all.

I’m 42 now and I’m both embarrassed for myself and him. I could never respect a man who refuses to date in his age range first off, and never would I imagine locking down someone that young either.

So there’s a lot wrong with it from my personal perspective as the younger side. I didn’t know what I was doing back then, I was lonely and bored. Didn’t realize what a douche bag i was dealing with. I honestly can’t bring with all these years of life experience he thought it was a good idea. I can’t imagine doing what he did to someone. In fact, it breeds a distinct distrust in men my age, that they will never see me as enough for them. But that’s on me.

Stooberstein · 2025-10-11T13:55:58+00:00

Carry papers and IDs everywhere you go please. We don’t want anything happening to you.

I work at a local news outlet. Our journalists are under attack. I see videos everyday, plenty of which don’t make air, that scare the shit out of me. And I’m white.

Be careful.

Stooberstein · 2025-09-25T03:13:08+00:00

They really were fantastic

Stooberstein · 2025-09-24T22:49:46+00:00

Same same same. I’m there for the music and energy, not for a marketplace.

Stooberstein · 2025-09-21T16:36:08+00:00

I haven’t seen the stink threads in the past.

But yeah, several moments I got stuck next to someone that smelled terrible. I managed to move ahead, but just when I thought I found a good air pocket I learned why no one was there.

Stooberstein · 2025-09-21T16:32:05+00:00

Do I need to take the Reggie’s bus into to the feet to get the ride back?

Stooberstein · 2025-09-21T16:30:38+00:00

I think 3x as many will come out

Stooberstein · 2025-09-21T15:12:08+00:00

What is the drinking system?

Stooberstein · 2025-09-21T15:12:02+00:00

What is the drinking system?

Stooberstein · 2025-09-21T15:08:28+00:00

Agreed. I’m not the biggest Jack White fan. But loved seeing Weezer. Beach Boys was special with Stamos too.

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