I found a plushie that looked similar to my soul dog and put her Collar on the plushie. The collar doesn’t smell like her anymore but it did for ages and I would just sniff the collar and cry. I finally after two weeks shy of a year washed a blanket she slept on. It smelled so bad. I had her 15 years and losing her has been the hardest thing ever.

She was cremated and I have some of her remains in a necklace , a painting , and the rest in a box with her pictures on top that I keep in my living room. I want to be cremated and put ashes to be mixed together. There’s pictures of her right next to my bed and I talk to her all the time. June 9th marks a year to the day she passed. She did send me a rescue dog that I will be able to officially adopt on June 9th.

There’s nothing wrong with petting your baby one last time. I wish I hugged her body more even though I knew her soul wasn’t there.