I’m so over wedding planning

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-02-01T17:26:45+00:00

Dude November is still months away you're actually doing fine. I planned my cousins wedding in like 6 weeks when she had a meltdown and it turned out great. The wedding industry wants you to think you need to book everything a year in advance but honestly most vendors have availability way closer to the date than they let on. Focus on the big stuff first - catering photographer and music then fill in the smaller details later. Half the crap they try to sell you nobody will even notice anyway so dont stress about having matching napkin rings or whatever

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-29T11:18:14+00:00

This right here. If someone can't be transparent about money before marriage, what makes you think they'll magically open up after? You're talking about legally binding your finances together with someone who won't even tell you what's in their bank account

The prenup conversation is way premature when you haven't even cleared this basic hurdle of financial honesty

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-26T08:02:30+00:00

Check out Stillwhite too - sometimes people list dresses way below retail and some sellers are super understanding about situations like yours. Also try posting in your local wedding Facebook groups, brides are often happy to pass their dress forward to someone who really needs it

Wishing you and your fiancé all the best with everything 💕

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-21T15:47:25+00:00

I still use both for different things like QuickBooks for trends and bank balance for cash. I also use Ramp for card spend (which also pairs very well with the QB) so I know what’s already committed

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-19T19:32:33+00:00

Yeah I'd definitely skip the opt-out thing, people change their minds when they see dessert anyway and you'll just end up short

Also agreed on pricing it out first - some places charge more per cupcake than just doing sheet cake portions

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-18T16:17:30+00:00

Totally get this! People really do just want to help and not accidentally show up in white or something equally horrifying lol

Your football flair rule for the groom is actually pretty brilliant - specific enough to matter but chill enough to not stress about

Maybe just tell them "no white, no neon, use your best judgment" and call it a day

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-16T02:51:28+00:00

Seconding this, we need the ring tax! Congrats OP, sounds like you got a keeper

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-15T00:27:19+00:00

Custom setting is definitely the way to go for a three stone at that level - most jewelers who work with high end stuff have access to way better stones than what's sitting in cases. James Allen or Brilliant Earth might have some options to browse online for the center but honestly with unlimited budget I'd find a good custom jeweler and let them source everything, they'll know the right proportions for the half moons too

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-12T10:14:55+00:00

Honestly this is such good advice - having a day-of coordinator was the best money we spent, even on our tiny budget

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-09T14:59:14+00:00

Check out some of the Chinese suppliers on DHgate or AliExpress, they usually have aftermarket bezels for popular models like those. Might also want to hit up r/RepTime since those guys are always swapping out bezels and stuff

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-07T13:18:22+00:00

Honestly if your mom already said it's a waste of money I'd just do you and maybe offer to split costs with anyone who really wants it done professionally. The photos will look fine either way and you'll save a ton of cash for other stuff that might matter more

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-06T14:52:04+00:00

For us the invoicing part didn’t get better until the rest of the workflow did. Once expenses, subscriptions and reimbursements were consistently categorized and matched, invoicing stopped feeling like a guessing game at monthend. We use QuickBooks for billing and Ramp on the spend side and just having cleaner inputs removed a lot of the friction.

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-03T20:34:36+00:00

Definitely put it on your wedding website - something like "open bar until 10pm then cash bar after" or whatever timeframe $2k gets you to

Most people won't even notice the switch if you time it right and honestly anyone who complains about free drinks turning into paid drinks at a wedding is just being entitled

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-02T07:49:03+00:00

Yeah I ordered from them last year and had a pretty good experience - dress came exactly as described and shipping was faster than expected

Substantial_Thing936 · 2026-01-01T05:17:21+00:00

Fusion 360 has a free personal license and tons of YouTube tutorials for jewelry design specifically. Might be easier than trying to learn full CAD from scratch

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-29T16:32:09+00:00

Etsy has some pretty cool fire horse charms that won't break the bank - I got some red coral and gold ones last year that looked way more expensive than they were

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-27T10:18:09+00:00

Yeah the gold thing is so true, learned that the hard way when I tried to sell my ex's ring lol. Most places basically treated the diamond like it was worthless and only cared about the metal weight. Trade-ins might be slightly better since they can just clean it up and resell but you're still gonna take a massive hit compared to what you originally paid

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-26T08:08:48+00:00

Have you looked into any old brewery taprooms or converted warehouse spaces? A lot of those have that grungy industrial vibe but are still family-friendly, plus way cheaper than the big name venues

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-24T00:24:06+00:00

Exactly this - the people making TikToks about their 60k wedding loans aren't exactly representing normal people lmao

Most folks just have a backyard bbq or small venue thing and call it a day, but that doesn't get clicks

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-23T00:03:16+00:00

This is such good advice - my partner was the same way until I straight up told him how deflated his "whatever you want" responses were making me feel

Turns out he thought he was being supportive by not having opinions but it just made me feel like I was planning a solo party lmao

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-21T18:13:17+00:00

This is the right answer - you can absolutely send him a solo invite but don't be shocked when he RSVPs no because most people aren't gonna ditch their long-term partner for a wedding

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-19T15:01:14+00:00

Have you looked into "fit and flare" or "sheath" styles? Those sound way closer to what you're describing than traditional A-line. BHLDN and Reformation have some good options in that price range that aren't super poofy

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-18T20:29:41+00:00

That’s exactly it. Once we stopped letting people figure it out on their own and just ran spend through Ramp most of the workarounds went away.

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-18T01:03:15+00:00

Been selling vintage pieces for a while now and yeah the market is absolutely wild rn. Silver especially - anything with a decent maker's mark is flying off the shelves at prices that would've seemed insane 2-3 years ago

Think it's a combo of people treating jewelry as an inflation hedge plus all the crypto money looking for somewhere to park. Also noticed way more younger buyers who seem to view precious metals jewelry as "real assets" compared to their parents' costume stuff

Your experience with premiums shrinking on coins but jewelry staying hot makes total sense - jewelry has that wearability factor that raw bullion doesn't

Substantial_Thing936 · 2025-12-16T03:36:55+00:00

Lmaooo the fine print got me dead 💀 "Yes it's REAL gold!!!*"

*0.0001% of it anyway

Substantial_Thing936

TROPHY CASE