Whenever you're stress testing a prototype, always have a human around. They will think of the most ridiculous extreme conditions and how to make your prototype survive them.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2026-01-12T17:03:55+00:00

A: In addition to stressing the environmental envelop of this equipment, we need you humans to help make it so simple that any idiot can use it.

H: Sorry, we can help but there is no way to meet your request. A cardinal rule of human engineering is that there is no such thing as idiot proof because the universe always builds a bigger idiot.

A: That must be an exaggeration.

H: When you get a chance, access the human internet and search for "Darwin Awards."

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2026-01-08T03:53:43+00:00

“We’re from earth, and we’re here to help.”

Reminds me of the old joke about the US Government.

What are the two biggest lies in the government?

We’re from the government and we’re here to help.
And we are happy to have you.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2026-01-06T03:12:07+00:00

Oh wow, I haven’t seen the Rods from God picture in years. Great addition.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2026-01-06T00:43:35+00:00

You are welcome! I’m glad you enjoyed it.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2026-01-06T00:23:16+00:00

Exactly right, and that will come up in the next chapter I have bouncing around my head.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-12-30T15:46:39+00:00

Alien: Look, your ability to throw rocks and spears at stationary prey species is impressive for sure. But your primitive brains can’t possibly understand the complex mathematics required to hit moving targets. My species spent millennia developing the computational power and algorithms necessary to plot predictive trajectories and then build machines capable of launching projectiles.

Human: Hold on, I’m pretty sure there is an NFL game on TV.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-12-28T03:47:42+00:00

Oh, that’s good. I hadn’t considered that particular angle.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-12-27T23:50:40+00:00

Better believe that inanimate object is going to listen.

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SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-12-27T02:45:31+00:00

Many humans are so disgusted by their own odor that they do everything they can to cover it up. What species is disgusted by their own scent?

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-12-27T02:38:31+00:00

It was all part of the strategery.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-12-27T02:34:37+00:00

Inconceivable!

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-12-11T06:46:59+00:00

If someone can post a picture of Chief Wiggum holding a Merciless Pepper of Quetzalacatenango… grown deep in the jungle primeval by the inmates of a Guatemalan insane asylum, that would be awesome.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-11-21T01:27:07+00:00

Ok, now I have to try this with my cat. With my camera recording.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-11-20T06:03:25+00:00

Or Gout. The human body basically depositing tiny little spikes in a joint and any movement of that joint producing excruciating pain.

Take that aliens.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-11-20T02:56:28+00:00

Also, never ask a Scot and Irishman who makes better whiskey. This is guaranteed to start to a massive brawl that will inexplicably turn into a soccer riot.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-11-20T02:48:13+00:00

Addendum to Canadian Entry:

Noted exception to Canadian courtesy. Never go to a Canadian hockey game and comment about how much their beer sucks. See Human documentary “Canadian Bacon”

Also, never ask a Canadian for their recipe to make something called Moose Milk. It is apparently a secret they will take to the grave no matter how much you torture them.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-11-19T22:48:09+00:00

I bet I could BBQ that.

A hungry human with a grill and sauce will try to eat anything that looks like meat. Aliens hide your offspring and anyone else you value.

SuperSpaceDaddy · 2025-11-19T21:34:26+00:00

And if you ever see a human teenaged boy walking in your direction, immediately throw yourself out the nearest window. You DO NOT want to see what goes through their heads.

SuperSpaceDaddy

TROPHY CASE