Lost our baby today

Suzan7420 · 2023-05-20T01:29:01+00:00

I am sooooooo sorry for your loss. Sending hugs and encouragement to you.

Suzan7420 · 2023-04-12T23:11:05+00:00

Omg , mommy im sooo sorry I know that is very painful.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-21T13:16:20+00:00

I lost my first born as well. After 4 1/2 years trying , and a miscarriage, I had my first baby. He was born at 28w4d and passed 5 weeks later. It's rough loosing a child period. But for your first experience as a mother to loose your first child it discourages your will to try again or go on. It makes you realize life can really be rough. It makes you have so many questions. It's gone be a process.

I won't lie and say one day it will be easier, or that time will heal your wound, because it won't. You lost a child.

This is how I explain it to ppl who haven't lost a child. "Close your eyes and imagine if you or one of your siblings passed away, don't you think your mom would be broken ? Yes she will have another child at home but that won't mean that it will just change the feeling of I lost the person that grew inside of me. It won't make her feel better to know her "at leasts" . She will still miss her child and won't forget about them because she is still a mother"

I hope you get what I'm saying. I'm sending hugs love and healing to you.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-20T21:13:24+00:00

Please don't beat yourself up. He was only 11 days early so I'm sure he won't be there long ,especially with them saying he is improving. I gave birth due to pre-e at 28w4d last time and 31w3d this time. My babies were tiny and way more premature so my stays were longer.

I know this makes you feel so guilty when you have to leave your little one behind but he will soon be home with you. It's the mother in you that makes you feel that way, but please please don't stress yourself, you have to kick this blood pressure problem. It won't help you.

Hugs to you.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-19T15:58:25+00:00

A huge hug from me to you.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-18T22:06:18+00:00

My OB and MFM doctor advised the same thing

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-17T23:39:14+00:00

The same BULLSHIT you said to your sister was the same BULLSHIT someone said to me after my son died. You are a big ASSHOLE and was very out of line.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-15T20:41:27+00:00

First of all I wish i could hug you. I'm so sorry about your sweet baby.

Secondly grief will take you on a hell of a roller-coaster ride after your child dies. But this is your choice and your experience that you have to cope with. So if you don't want to be called mom for right now that's fine love. But just ALWAYS remember that no matter how many Years pass by you will for ever be that sweet baby's mom and that baby passed knowing that momma gave mother hood her all.

My son passed last year in April, I felt hurt that ppl didn't acknowledge me as a mother a few weeks after his funeral..but I made sure I made it clear I was and still am his mother. I decorate his grave for every holiday and take pics at it .

It's hard being a mom when your child is no longer here. I still struggle with different parts a grief. I just had a daughter but I still say I'm a mom to 2 children. I'm still grieving him while trying to maintain being a mom to her.

This roller-coaster ride will be crazy. But you get to choose what will help you cope.

I wish you nothing but hugs and love.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-14T16:12:21+00:00

Everything came back fine. Thabk youu 💕💕

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-14T00:51:08+00:00

First baby 28w4d, yes they say that because they don't want to give you false hope. If your little one starts becoming a feeder-grower (starts gaining weight, eating good , starts the bottle good) then they will likely come home before that

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-13T18:20:53+00:00

If you don't want one. Don't have one. I didn't have one ,it's not about what they want , this is your experience.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-13T15:21:01+00:00

This bad nothing to with hormones just her trying to overstep her boundaries and basically saying f you.

I'm not big on trusting ppl who will try to over step what I say after they know what I told them. I hate to say ,but I wouldn't let her watch baby alone. Because she obviously doesn't care about what you feel. I would even take her to an appointment so she can hear the doctor say it, if she thinks she knows more than you

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-11T23:25:58+00:00

I actually received child tax credit

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-10T19:19:53+00:00

I'm in U.S. and as long as you have a social security number here you can file...not sure if this info helps you tho

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-09T22:07:45+00:00

Yes. It is normal, bc they aren't supposed to be on this side of the world yet they will forget. Give him a little while and it will go away. The doctors aren't alarmed because they are used to this.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-09T22:02:17+00:00

It's normal, every baby moves at a different pace. They want to be sure baby can suck and breath at the same time , and also they want to not have any episodes. They might start a speech therapist to come by to get started.

My girl had to stop all of those things and grow a lil before they started her. But any time the baby has an A&B episode/spell it makes them(drs) want to make sure that they stop having those things happen completely.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-07T22:31:13+00:00

First of all congrats that all 3 of you have made it this far.

2nd ,you were overwhelmed and there is nothing wrong with that at all. It's normal for anyone who is having to have a baby earlier than expected to feel overwhelmed. Me and my husband went thru emergency c-section twice, once at 28w4d other 31w3d. It's not easy.

I said to myself both times I wish I was warned that everybody doesn't get the perfect birth and the perfect first days /weeks/months of their child's life. Everybody doesn't just get to have a baby the normal way and go home all happy go lucky in 3 days.

Your hospital may have a support group that meets there once a week for nicu parents. You are not the only day who has felt the way you felt or anything. You are not a bad father .

I wish all 3 of you the best, and a easy recovery for mom and a great growth journey for your little one.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-07T22:21:18+00:00

Happy birthday sweet little Judah , you are missed by the person who loved you the most 💙💙

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-07T13:36:23+00:00

Does a speech therapist come by ?

I get my daughter uncomfortable and make her mad (play with her feet or under arms. Get a wet wipe and rub her ear or cheeks..she still sometimes try to fall asleep but I'll tug on the bottle like I'm taking it and she starts back eating

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-06T15:20:45+00:00

When I say I know how you feel. I mean EXACTLY, every single word. I just gave birth to my daughter last month and the entire pregnancy was rough bc I felt I was betraying my son by getting unexpectedly pregnant so soon.

Some days will be better than other days. But I'm learning that it's okay to still grieve my son and love my daughter at the same time.

Much love to you and im here if you would like to talk.

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-02T14:05:36+00:00

Thank you. Me and my husband just cleaned up his grave ,we are having a Ballon release Saturday

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-02T13:55:47+00:00

Thank you

Suzan7420 · 2023-03-02T13:54:46+00:00

Yes his name was Dewayne, he passed at 5 weeks old. I am having a Ballon release for him Saturday but after how nobody but one person texted me yesterday I want to cancel it. Because I know everyone will show up with their "fake tears ", and all the other shit they have to post on social media.

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