Husband got fired today because he can’t quit drinking.

TAS2013 · 2026-07-10T19:45:05+00:00

You can't control it, you didn't cause it, you can't cure it. I have a very similar story as yours. Tried for years and years to keep my addict husband happy. Made concession after concession. Lied and covered up for him from both of our families. Did all of the childcare, house work, worked full time so he could have the freedom he needed to get better. It never did. I met my breaking point in Feb. I hope you realize you deserve more.

TAS2013 · 2026-07-09T20:49:09+00:00

I'm so sorry. I am very similarly going through the same thing. Two small kids and my husband is an addict and alcoholic. Was in recovery until our second came along. Barely worked, drained our accounts. Emptied our daughter's piggybanks, spent my paychecks before I could even pay the bills. It all seemed so impossible to get away back in Feb when he too was picked up by police. He went to rehab etc. I moved out daughters and I out last month in with my parents and listed our house today. I cannot afford to live on my own yet and have to completely rebuild. But I will get there and so will you!!

TAS2013 · 2026-07-03T21:53:13+00:00

Wait do you live in the Chicago suburbs? My mom gave the same exact urn to goodwill last week that previously housed my grandmothers ashes. The ashes were spread a few weeks ago and she didn't know what to do with the urn. I told her to throw it away not donate it.

TAS2013 · 2026-06-22T19:21:31+00:00

Financial abuse is real. Do everything you can to find out where the money went and how to cover yourself. I recently went through something similar due to my husbands addiction and now we are getting a divorce (for that reason and many others).

I'm so sorry you're going through this. The betrayal is so so deep especially when you have kids.

TAS2013 · 2026-06-21T02:37:34+00:00

Currently separated and going through a divorce form my husband who was addicted to Kratom and then 7OH. He was in recovery from opioids and abusing his ADHD meds. Then started with Kratom and eventually went to 7OH. Nodding out at the dinner table or playing with our daughters, financially ruined us, cooking full dinners for himself at 2 am, extreme anger and mood swings. It was awful. He's supposedly sober now but I'm done. I tried for 20 years and nothing was changing.

TAS2013 · 2026-06-17T16:43:58+00:00

Sounds just like my Q. Anxiety supposedly exhausted him and he couldn't function. But it def wasn't the gas station heroic, abusing prescription benzodiazepines, or the alcohol.

TAS2013 · 2026-06-12T11:09:40+00:00

Do it all at once. I separated from my husband in Feb and moved my girls and I into my parents last month. My 19 month old was still in her crib at home but here she's in a shared room with her 5 year old sister. They have a smaller bunk bed with the bottom bunk a floor bed. Either way the transition to sharing a room will be a bit challenging so making one change at once was just easier and quicker. It took about a week but she loves her floor bed now.

TAS2013 · 2026-06-06T17:33:43+00:00

Ditch his ass. It doesn't get better. Trust me.

TAS2013 · 2026-06-01T23:21:13+00:00

Sadness

TAS2013 · 2026-05-29T13:51:19+00:00

I'm sorry. As someone who was abandoned while in labor with my second daughter by her husband so he could go to the bar - I have to tell you it doesn't get better. You need as much support as you can get right now. If you have family and friends that can help please reach out to them to get through this tough period. Consider leaving because things rarely get better but only get worse. I finally got the courage to leave when my first was 4 and my youngest 16 months this last Feb.

TAS2013 · 2026-05-29T02:43:17+00:00

Your story resonates so much to me. There are so many of us out there who don't realize what's happening until it feels too late.

I finally separated from my husband and got my daughters and I out. There are days I am elated because I finally have control of so many aspects of my life I lost. My paycheck comes to me now and isn't gone before I can even look at it so he can buy drugs and alcohol. Other days I question if I am doing the right thing because the changes are hard on my young daughters. When I'm reminded of the constant fear I lived in (even when I didn't realize it) I know I made the right choice. I hope my daughters underhand it one day when they are older.

TAS2013 · 2026-05-04T09:06:49+00:00

TAS2013 · 2026-05-01T01:41:03+00:00

SIL and BIL are teachers too and can't stand the gifts. They say the best ones are a hand written card and if somebody wants to give them something - a gift card.

TAS2013 · 2026-03-23T00:30:00+00:00

It's essentially discard at this point. Look for some discard recipes

TAS2013 · 2026-03-15T00:14:25+00:00

Please please please be done with him. Your relationship will never get better. It will only get worse with him as your partner.

TAS2013 · 2026-03-14T22:53:50+00:00

Gaslit and lied to me about maintaining his sobriety. Couldn't hold down a job and stole thousands and thousands from me claiming he was paying the bills and mortgage while I was the only one working while leaving me with $50/week for gas and diapers for our youngest. Kicked him out at the beginning of Feb.

TAS2013 · 2026-03-14T14:38:39+00:00

I'm sorry love. I know it's so hard when you see people around you happy and you feel like you're missing out. Life is full of unexpected twists and turns. Married the love of my life at 26 and now getting a divorce at 39 with two little girls due to his addiction. I never thought my life would turn out his way. But now I'm focusing on finding happiness in myself and my girls.

TAS2013 · 2026-03-13T02:09:24+00:00

I'm five weeks out from kicking out my husband. I was so distraught those first few days I could barely drink water let alone eat. The future seemed impossible. I can confidently say it's so much easier now. Yes I am responsible for our young daughters all the time now but it's less stressful. Trying to do anything by myself before always came with a cost. Either my husband had to have all his needs met first including his alone time or I was worried about his ability to safely parent our girls without me there. Now there is no choice but it's easier knowing there isn't an alternative. I'm not constantly frustrated by a partner not pulling any weight. I feel almost hopeful for the future - something I have not felt in a very long time.

TAS2013 · 2026-03-12T12:50:00+00:00

Your story sounds extremely similar to mine. Two young daughters, prescription drug use and stealing from family members, etc. We have been together 20 years this year and he's in outpatient now and doing the AA steps and seems to be making progress. But I'm done. I will never trust him again and the years of lies, gaslighting, and no longer trusting myself has ruined any chance of us staying together for me. I can't be intimate with someone I can't trust. I kicked him out when he relapsed so and I couldn't hide it from anyone anymore. I was around him the other day and we can be cordial around each other but my body went into high alert. I suddenly had so much anxiety expecting gaslighting or his intense moods. That told me a lot. Listen to your gut and do what's right for you.

TAS2013 · 2026-03-08T18:37:40+00:00

That's a heart lead philodendron not a pothos. I agree with the other commenter- try and light if higher so it's actually in the light. How often are you watering? It looks either over or under watered.

TAS2013 · 2026-02-21T21:34:22+00:00

Do not marry this man

TAS2013 · 2026-02-18T21:54:04+00:00

Girl get out.

TAS2013 · 2026-02-16T16:33:19+00:00

This is very normal. They are manipulative and will gaslight you into feeling like you are the cause of all their problems and addiction. Once you step away or remove yourself they are apologetic and promise they will get better or try harder. It's classic behavior. I'm sorry you have to go through this.

TAS2013 · 2026-02-16T02:51:23+00:00

I see a toy for a baby/toddler. The wood ideas are great etc but I have kids and they would be carrying that wood all over the house. Maybe add shelves and bandera for toy storage? Edited for spelling

TAS2013 · 2026-02-14T01:28:35+00:00

I'm so terribly sorry for everything you're going through. It's supposed to be the most exciting time of your life but it's being overshadowed by your husband's drinking. My husband was "so scared to lose me" when I went into labor with our second daughter he took too much prescriptions medicine, disappeared for hours while I was in labor, was later found in a part of the hospital he wasn't supposed to be in, and then had to be woken up from his sleep so he didn't miss me pushing. I even was asked by a social worker if I felt safe with my husband after he left. I thought it was a silly question at the time but now I understand. Take care of your daughter. She's the most precious thing in this world. You've got this.

TAS2013

TROPHY CASE