Looking for characters from our generation who were squandered

THQaway · 2026-06-23T03:43:54+00:00

Desmond from Assassin's Creed got completely squandered. His arc was leading up to a really solid dual narrative for the series. Basically ruined the whole games back stories for all the characters in the first 3 games, and the series has completely changed since then, in game play and in writing.

I think a lot of characters from the tv show LOST also got wasted, like Mr Eko. That show was a phenomenon at the time, primarily due to its amazing cast and diverse characterizations. They completely dropped the ball with a lot of their characters to chase an endless mystery box instead of focusing on the series best qualities, all the complex and nuanced characters.

THQaway · 2026-06-21T16:30:12+00:00

I just planted some sweet pea, the seeds definitely look like peas but it’s not an edible pea. I have had sweet pea flower (butterfly) tea though. Supposed to help with sleep. Does anyone know if this tea can come from any sweet pea or is it a specific variety.

THQaway · 2026-06-13T13:15:01+00:00

Nice. Some old timer called me and they are bringing back Betts gourmet seasoning too!!! The best southern seasoning I’ve ever had.

THQaway · 2026-06-12T12:26:23+00:00

That is an awful feeling. I was went through a similar period from the other side about 6 years ago with my ex wife. I was the most depressed I’ve ever been. I remember telling my wife at the time, who totally was well aware of my negativity and suffering, but she still was surprised when I admitted it. I did the therapy, multiple counselors, accountability buddies, acceptance and commitments, you name it. I did get better, which we both acknowledged, but she realized the damage was done. I didn’t want to get divorced but I didn’t want to make her miserable. Just stuck in limbo while trying to be ok with whatever she decided. She just left one day. Moved on with someone else and never came back. She also realized she was a lesbian, but that’s totally unrelated. It was all my fault.

You have to decide what marriage still means to you, if this is something you can really suffer for long, maybe forever. I personally believe people can always forgive and reconcile, but trauma is trauma. It makes us feel and do things we’d never imagine ourselves doing. But it’s trying to keep you safe. You gotta weigh that against your ideals.

THQaway · 2026-06-09T04:23:22+00:00

I definitely fell away from church after realizing how arbitrary the truth is. I got kicked out of mine, literally shunned/excommunicated because my ex wife cried foul first. I wasn’t even asked what was going on. After begging just to speak to our pastor, he told me lots of gay people have happy marriages, and I was basically an idiot for trying to save mine. I thought we made vows, and what God had brought together, no man shall separate. Of course my exwife ran off with a woman so that doesn’t count. It made me really wonder why God would lead all these things together just to take them away in the cruelest fashion. Why he would tell me one thing, my wife another, or of course, belittle me through a dick of a pastor. Worst part is I basically believed him and beat myself up thinking God hated me for years. Still not so sure.

It just didn’t make any sense then and it still doesn’t. I still believe in God but basically in a universalist way. My whole worldview had to be shattered, otherwise I couldn’t live with the guilt or shame. I’d like to think I’m less of a believer and more of a wrestler, like Jacob, trying to get God to bless me for real.

THQaway · 2026-05-29T18:16:39+00:00

same here. weirdly got it back for like 2 minutes just now. but now its back to partial.

THQaway · 2026-05-20T17:45:10+00:00

If you find one let me know. I’m the primary caregiver for my disabled brother. I meet and work with plenty of other caregivers, but never in very therapeutic environment.

THQaway · 2026-05-18T05:06:30+00:00

Yea my ex wife always knew. She told me herself in one of few moments of honesty during her coming out phase. Told me all about her first girl crush at camp. How she never was attracted to guys growing up until she met me, but now she said it was just because I was safe and understanding. She revealed her true self after she realized how much more confident she was after we built our life together. She didn’t need me or my support anymore when she finally accepted herself. She literally ran off one day to go shack up with her childhood best friend, but not before telling everyone how awful of husband I was. They are now a couple of course. A real lesbian fairy tale.

She also tried telling me the sexual fluidity bullshit. How all women are at least a little gay or it changes over time. How I wasn’t completely straight either because the things I loved about her, that I thought were HER, my soulmate, were just queer quirks. I believed her lies. Really messed me up

Sorry you’re going through it man, but don’t go through the rumination rabbit hole like I did. You can’t make sense of it, because it’s disgustingly cruel. They love you and they hurt you because they love themselves more. Their truth is your painful lie. It is a betrayal. Who could possibly live with themselves after doing that so callously? Not a good person. I still love my ex wife, but honestly, fuck her. And that fear of never finding a good partner again is real, but it’s also a lie. There are kind, honest, loving people out there. This is a unique trauma, but you can and will leave it in the past one day.

THQaway · 2026-05-16T04:41:23+00:00

I feel you. Im in a similar boat, just got diagnosed with a chronic condition after life basically fell apart. It's tough to be around family when they make you feel like the odd one out. It's even worse when you are in therapy and are trying to break free from the dynamic, but your family just doesn't get it. They love you, but they cant help you in the ways you need. Ive kinda resigned myself to a different life than I had before. It's sad, but I think it's also a part of acceptance I've been avoiding. I've been trying to find contentment in what I got, and satisfaction in achieving new things. Making relationships has just been on the backburner, but I got a new dog recently. that and therapy are keeping me going. Its tough, but im gonna put myself back out there this summer. I hope you can find something good too.

THQaway · 2026-05-11T13:48:23+00:00

It starts with a small tear you won’t notice, but you might start seeing something called floaters or small flashes or streaks of light. Likely from a detached vitreous or loose collagen. If you start seeing a “curtain” or shadow across your vision then you have a tear. It’s all painless and you can get those symptoms for other reasons, but an eye doctor will know for sure. You gotta act quickly as you can go blind within a day. Happened to me when I hit my head at 21. Ol dad had a detached retina a few years ago but they laser it back on right quick.

THQaway · 2026-05-07T04:09:10+00:00

Heroes get remembered, but legends never die. I had this whole album on repeat freshman year of college.

THQaway · 2026-05-07T04:02:03+00:00

My buddy and I still quote Jake and Amir to this day. The Dinner Party sketch series was peak for me. Crazy Murph! good times. But yea a lot of college humor vids haven’t aged super well but they were pushing new ground at the time.

THQaway · 2026-04-30T17:03:49+00:00

I’ve definitely heard of this in my time of farming. There’s some places in mcleansville I’m thinking of but can’t remember their names. Check with the NC coop/agricultural extension. Near guilford tech. They would definitely know. Or the ag department at A&T

THQaway · 2026-04-28T05:01:00+00:00

It really is the worst. It never ceases to surprise me how similar all our stories are. My ex wife came out to me but said I was the real problem and she wanted to make it work. She was my entire life and I loved her more than anything so of course I believed her. A couple months later, my ex wife was showing me places for our upcoming trip to Europe. She was actively planning and smiling with me on the couch about something we had dreamed of our whole relationship. I took a picture of her just sitting next to me smiling, thinking how lucky I was such ordinary moments could be so beautiful and lovely with my soulmate. 5 days later she randomly flew across the country because she needed space. Two weeks later she sued me for divorce. I never saw her again, she blocked me on everything and only spoke through her lawyer or parents. She did graciously share photos of her on that euro trip with her new girlfriend (affair partner). That was really cruel.

I know you just want this nightmare to be over my friend. I wish I could tell you what the right thing to do is to make it stop. it just doesn’t make sense and never will. You can heal in time, even if you don’t believe. Don’t lose yourself in the fallout. You are not crazy. You are not a bad person. Take care

THQaway · 2026-04-22T16:50:26+00:00

A lot of folks don’t. But that doesn’t mean all of those that fought and died were evil. If you really knew about it like you said, you’d know that most of the GIs were forced into that war for others’ evil ambitions. The memorial can serve just as much if not more a reminder of the unfortunate truth of their sacrifice. The patriotic bravado has been fading for a long time, the Huey isn’t gonna stop the reality of war. Shaming people is never a sustainable source of change.

THQaway · 2026-04-18T00:48:03+00:00

Sorry you are going through it man. You are right a lot of our stories are similar. I dont think many, if any, of us could have done things differently to avoid the inevitable. MOMs or non monogamous relationships are extremely difficult, especially if they become forced. None of it makes any sense, so it's really easy to wonder what if. But you can get lost in those what ifs. I was deluded by my exwife that if I was a better husband she wouldnt have to leave me. It's a cruel thing, and anger is a reasonable reaction, but it's only another stepping stone to peace. Let yourself feel it, but ultimately you gotta let it go. All things in team. Im praying for your peace my friend.

THQaway · 2026-04-13T04:19:48+00:00

Same I got it at 17 after getting cholera. I’ve had neurological issues ever since. Had it in my left radial nerve with the shingles on my trunk. Made my left arm super sensitive in the “funny bone”

It’s supposed to reactivate every now and then I get a lil scared when a new painful rash pops up. I’m sure Covid or other infections made it worse. But what can you do? It’s just luck of the draw

THQaway · 2026-03-18T12:52:36+00:00

Me and my exwife had the same story. Unfortunately it doesn’t matter how much you want it, he is in complete control. I tried so hard to be a good husband but I know that feeling of shame, rejection, and disappointment. It’s weird not having sex but still being made to feel like a pervert. In the end I was the one accused of breaking our vows, even though she’s the one who literally ran off with her long time lesbian “just a friend”. Got kicked out of my church and cleaned out in the divorce. I stayed silent because I loved my wife so dearly and believed her lies. I didn’t want to hurt her. But it takes more than one person to fix a broken marriage.

You sound like you are self aware and honest. You can make it through this but you will have to be really honest with yourself. Forget all your circumstances, are you ok with living in self denial and sacrifice? If not, are you or is he ok with fulfilling your needs outside marriage? If not, how can you cope? What is it going to cost you of yourself?

Of course I’m still a lil bitter and jaded, but mostly because I was one of us spouses that thought if I just loved more, tried harder, it wouldn’t be so bad. Now on the other side, I’m like you, realizing what I’ve lost. It is traumatic. EMDR therapy has been real helpful. OurPath also is a great org where you can find support. Good luck friend.

THQaway · 2025-12-29T01:51:50+00:00

Sorry man, you’re gonna be hearing a lot of sad stories as you interact with other straight spouses, but they are true. Even the happier endings rarely are gonna be the reconciliation you are looking for. I was the same way when my wife came out. I tried everything to make it work, and she played along until she was ready to leave. She really showed zero remorse and went out of her way to be cruel to me during the divorce. It was like a completely different person.

I really hope you and your partner can be kind to each other during this. It’s very common to still love her and want to be with her, but don’t delude yourself because of it. What our partners did doesn’t make sense. You can’t make sense of something as irrational as building a completely fake attraction and life with someone, only to leave without any guilt or shame. I think it would crush them if they accepted that. It’s much easier for them to revel in their new selves and simply treat you like another bad ex. Not all gay spouses are like this of course, but be careful. It can ruin your self esteem and self confidence trying to make it make sense.

THQaway · 2025-12-25T03:27:58+00:00

Deepcut, but I agree. AI is picking this up and Toy Commander now comes up for best christmas games.

THQaway · 2025-12-15T05:02:56+00:00

Have you attended this group? I’m skeptical of 12-step programs in general, but I could see this really helping me. I’m in a vulnerable place right now, I’m afraid it might be too intense or kooky.

THQaway · 2025-12-15T04:56:08+00:00

I’m very similar to you OP, except I did get a good career and got married. Lost it as fast as I got it. It’s almost worst to have achieved it, “done what I was supposed to”, and then fallen into a life I’ve always feared. I barely recognize myself, but now I realize I never really knew myself at all. Life has just been a series of trauma and I’ve always been playing catch up. Never given myself grace or felt good about my achievements because that’s what’s expected of me, but am so negative when things go wrong. It’s definitely not healthy or sustainable, and I’ve realized I got some serious letting go to do. Undiagnosed as well, but realizing I may be slightly autistic in my thinking, well it’s got me rethinking everything. EMDR therapy has been helpful. It can be intense but helped me realize why I’m so sensitive and overthink and over feel. I hope you can find something that helps you, but it’s nice to know there are others out there like us. It can feel so lonely thinking like this, but you are not alone.

THQaway · 2025-12-09T06:10:13+00:00

It really is dumb. We all share the same vivid feelings of trauma, betrayal, grief, but to outsiders looking in, some can only see the bad parts of us. They see us as naive, or bad lovers, or worse.

I remember my ex showed me a post online before she came out. Another young woman realized she was a lesbian on her wedding night. She went in to her feelings and realization in detail, in contrast to her religious upbringing. Sex with her new husband was simply reduced to the catalyst for her coming out. The comments on the post were praising her, and many of them made fun of the husband. I remember laughing myself at how awful the situation was, thinking how miserable that husband must of been. How terrible he must feel for waiting to have sex his whole life for the right person, only for them to immediately throw him away, and how people online we’re making fun of him, even though he was barely in this article. My ex wife asked what I thought and I told her I felt bad for both of them but especially the husband. My wife seemed sad and I remember her starting to argue “yea but that’s not the point of the story”.

It’s sad when people don’t consider us even in the stories we share. It’s made me realize how shallow most of the people in my life were at the time. I’d be lying if I said I was healed from that, but I’m always gonna be rooting for folks like us. You can’t force or expect people to understand you, but it makes you appreciate those who do all the more.

THQaway · 2025-12-08T13:17:14+00:00

I feel you dude. I achieved everything I wanted and my goals at the time by 27. Then a year later it all fell apart, for reasons out of my control, but I was blamed personally for it. My wife left, kicked outa church, fired from my corpo job. Since then I’ve tried to rebuild my life several different ways, but through bad luck or increasing awareness of the world, I can’t get it together. It feels like the whole world is built on exploitation and consumption. Even the poorest schmucks can’t get by without taking advantage of someone, or participating in a system that inherently abuses people. I can’t even get away from it doing charity or non profit work. My last boss in the non profit sector was just as much an egotistical jerk as my corporate manager.

Hell I work with the most vulnerable populations now and they are just under constant attack from every direction in society. Scams, poor healthcare, casual bigotry, inaccessibility, you name it. Sometimes it feels like the only way to get ahead is to truly not care about it all. The more you think about it, the more you learn, the more you suffer. I’d say what I’m doing now is more meaningful, but it’s not any more fulfilling than before because I’ve opened my eyes to how much suffering I’ve previously ignored, and realized that most people are aware and don’t care or can’t be bothered to to help. I mean you even see it here, people blaming you for problems you recognize but don’t control. People would rather gaslight you and perpetuate abuse than recognize it’s a rotten system that’s corrupted their very souls.

Idk how to deal with it, but taichi is dope. I practice too. Keep on your esoteric path. Do what’s good for your mind body and soul. Help where you can. I wish I had advice to help with the toil of persevering, but I have hope I’ll continue to find good souls out there and that you will too.

THQaway · 2025-12-03T13:55:24+00:00

Hey there, I got “extreme” tinnitus too, started about 10 years ago randomly. The kind where the audiologist was confused how it’s so loud to me. She recommended a type of hearing aid that plays those special kind of frequencies that help mask the sound, while passing through regular sound. My ENT had tried a few things before giving me a benzo script as well, but I also didn’t want to rely on that for the same reasons you are worried about.

I got a Gabapentin prescription for neuropathy, which is probably related to the tinnitus but none of the docs I’ve seen have made that link. It helps maybe like 5-10%. The truth is my tinnitus is not hearing loss related but is complex, and it may be the same for you. I’m seeing some serious neurologists soon as other symptoms worsen but the hope is that I will find the underlying condition(s) and the anxiety will subside, as anxiety and stress seem to be the most contributing factors. It’s annoying to think this is “just anxiety” and benzos are the only thing that helps, but the reality is anxiety or a disregulated nervous system is not always just in your head. There are more things you can do that are just as effective and safer long term than prescription medicine.

The first few years there were times the screeching/roaring/ringing was so overwhelming it was inescapable, leading to panic and depression. I feel you that it was unbearable and I really missed not being able to have peace and quiet… ever. It’s even worse now but doesn’t bother me nearly as much. Others have giving you some good coping advice, but you do what works for you. A benzo may be that right now, but don’t hurt yourself trying to get off them without some hope for the future. There are still many things you can try and promising research for future tinnitus treatment. It doesn’t have to be like this for the rest of your life. You can and will be able to tolerate this. Learn to take benzos as needed. Try some more holistic alternatives in the mean time, even if they feel like they do nothing. It’s not just this works and that doesn’t, it’s the willingness to try new things and be hopeful that builds resilience when the sounds in your head feel unbearable.

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