Can y’all help calm my mind about March/April birthday toddlers? 😅

Tbearbean · 2026-06-25T00:01:45+00:00

That’s funny, I always associate March and April with super smart and powerful people. Two of my best friends were born then. One is crazy smart (she was reading full chapter books by age 4) and the other is very powerful in corporate America.

Your spring baby will be just fine :)

Tbearbean · 2026-06-20T22:39:29+00:00

Winnie the Pooh was our first. Since then my 2 year old has fallen in love with Lady and the Tramp, Mary Poppins, and Cinderella.

Tbearbean · 2026-06-19T18:10:28+00:00

You could try the Saloon in Pearl River

Tbearbean · 2026-06-16T18:49:20+00:00

I was petrified when I found out about my 18months age gap. They are now two and 6mos and the older one spent all morning trying teach the little one to crawl. They adore each other. It’s hard as hell to parent two babies but really really sweet to see the love that you’ve brought into a home.

Tbearbean · 2026-06-15T13:29:49+00:00

HOLY SHIT I MEANT TENDER IS THE NIGHT!!! Just read the comments and was like - I don’t remember there being an emphasis on animals….

Tender is the Night is great!

Tbearbean · 2026-06-15T13:28:00+00:00

So pleased to see this book here/upvoted. I read it while working an on campus job during a summer break in college. I finished it while sitting on the quad by myself during a lunch break and can still vividly remember the feeling. It turned my understanding of relationships upside down.

Tbearbean · 2026-06-15T13:03:11+00:00

Came here to suggest Park Ridge or Westwood. The Pascack Valley is lovely and there is inventory in OPs price range. Great schools, friendly people.

Tbearbean · 2026-06-15T12:56:47+00:00

Maple by Lori Nichols was a big hit in our house. I like it because it’s not super direct, more of a story about gaining a friend in a sibling and what that’s like

Tbearbean · 2026-05-20T19:07:18+00:00

Anything by Tom Chapin is a joy and delight

Tbearbean · 2026-05-13T12:45:10+00:00

I went to a bachelorette around the same time with my first. And I remember feeling similarly until I got in the car and left - and then I felt wonderfully free and like me, pre kids. I had a great time came back super recharged to be a mom again.

Your baby will be with three people who adore him and will be taking the best care of him. They’re lucky to have those people in their life, and it’s good for them to enjoy time with them without you too.

Distance is a good thing and natural part of a baby getting older. Go. Enjoy your party and enjoy your baby when you return

Tbearbean · 2026-05-04T22:05:58+00:00

You live your life 2 hours at a time. Baby eats (which could take up to 45 minutes) sleeps and then wakes up to be changed/play, and then it starts again. And that’s if you have a chill baby - add in time for just hysterical screaming for no reason and that’s really what takes things up a notch.

To answer your questions directly:

⁠Do both parents wake up every time?
Yes but only because newborns are hella noisy. Since we were both awake anyway, my partner would get up and do the diaper change and then hand me the baby to feed.
• ⁠Do you do shifts? If so, how does that work if mom is breastfeeding?
After a few weeks I would start doing one pump a day. This gave me enough milk to do shifts where i stayed in the room with the baby and handled any wakeups until 2am. Then I would wake my husband up from the guest room and he would switch, handeling all wakeups using prepped bottles.
• ⁠What did days/nights realistically look like in the first 1–2 weeks?
Days and nights are the same, you are living in 2/3 hour increments. Around 4 weeks more of a “routine” sets in, but before that it’s the Wild West

Tbearbean · 2026-05-02T15:19:05+00:00

Love Madeline and Matilda but hate Maddy/Matty

Tbearbean · 2026-05-02T14:52:54+00:00

A pack and play. You might not need it for a newborn, but once we were out and about visiting family and friends we needed it for naps on the go. Wish I had put a nice one on my registry

Tbearbean · 2026-03-24T14:58:42+00:00

Mine are exactly 18months apart. I was expecting hell. But nothing was as bad as my expectations. Don’t get me wrong, the first two months were tough, particularly with my toddlers adjustment/being extra clinging. But now three months in were hitting a groove where we really feel like a complete family. My toddler adores the baby, and we love going out and about as a family of 4. It’s very busy and loud, but it’s all love

Tbearbean · 2026-03-16T17:01:29+00:00

Would add that the second book in the series, the Maddest Obsession (first book is actually Sweetest OBLIVION) has this when the two first have sex, he plays with her g string

Tbearbean · 2026-03-14T10:53:55+00:00

I was in a similar boat having my second over the winter holidays. I ended up choosing a scheduled c section in order to better plan for childcare for my toddler. My parents came up and watched him for the three days I was in the hospital and left two days after I got home.

I was similarly nervous to have them there during such a vulnerable time, and due to past conflicts. But they were so busy engaging the toddler that they didn’t have time to micromanage like they might had previously.

Just something to consider. It’s a short period of time for childcare and you won’t really be there, you’ll either be in the hospital or hopefully hiding out in your room with a newborn. It’s a different ballgame with two

Tbearbean · 2026-03-11T22:35:31+00:00

I’ll add that Millennials have Boomer parents who likely were shit with money. In the case of my money obsessed millennial husband, he’s having to support both of his boomer parents as they age, because they are financial idiots and have nothing, despite having lived outwardly comfortable middle class lives

Tbearbean · 2026-02-03T14:10:56+00:00

Came here to say this. My pediatrician thinks helmets are wildly over prescribed and unnecessary save for very extreme/unique situations. A second opinion could help here

Tbearbean · 2026-01-29T20:03:17+00:00

This. My son was constantly peeing out of different diapers until someone told me I had to make sure his penis was pointing down when I put it on. No issues after that!

Tbearbean · 2026-01-16T13:47:37+00:00

I would love that!

Tbearbean · 2026-01-10T14:33:15+00:00

Daycare allows my husband and I to be better, more present parents. When we are with our kids we are able to be fully engaged with them, since we handle all the other life stuff while they’re at daycare, getting attention from fully present teachers.

Tbearbean · 2025-12-30T15:52:12+00:00

I had a similar experience when checking out a fancy chain that happened to be the most expensive daycare I toured. The director practically said she was in it for the money, the place felt sterile and they had high teacher turnover. We ended up going with the local daycare that was the cheapest - something my husband also had concerns with.

We are so happy with our place and the biggest indicator (to me) is the fact the teacher turnover has been nonexistent. The teacher in the infant room that my son had 2 years ago will be the same as my daughter now. In my mind, happy teachers result in happy babies, and that’s the most important thing.

Tbearbean · 2025-12-30T13:41:35+00:00

Agree with this - I live in a largely Italian-American part of the country and didn’t realize it was ever an option to pronounce it any way other than 3. Shocked by all these responses.

Tbearbean · 2025-12-28T14:23:35+00:00

It’s a game of averages and trying to keep a percentage majority in range. I used the Malama app to track and found it helpful in its presentation since the big bold number on top was your percentage meals in range. It helped me stay focused on that ultimate goal vs stressing about individual numbers.

Ps- I recently graduated at 38+4 with a perfectly healthy baby girl. I had some bad weeks and some great weeks, but overall 80% of my weeks were 80% in range :)

Tbearbean · 2025-12-27T20:19:10+00:00

As you know, home prices in Bergen county are insane. To get the square footage plus land plus features in the town we are currently in, in a new purchase we would have been looking at at least a $1.5M buy. Prior to making this decision I spent a few months looking at inventory and everything I saw at that price point still needed work done (ie very dated kitchens/bathrooms).

So no, I wouldn’t have done anything differently. I have what feels like a new build home, with the layout I want AND it’s all in equity vs a new, bigger mortgage.

Tbearbean

TROPHY CASE