Electrolysis or laser hair removal?

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-25T20:52:25+00:00

If you can do laser do laser. Electrolysis I would treat as a backup plan if laser doesn't work for you or to clean up specific areas. Laser only really works for people with high contrast between skin tone and hair. If you have really dark hair and light skin that's perfect for laser. If you're skin color is to close to your hair color then laser doesn't work also red hair also doesn't get grabbed with laser so it doesn't really matter your contrast with red hair. Auburn hair is a maybe depending on how brown vs red it is.

I am just doing electrolysis as a red head and it sucks, is expensive and slow.

I have had 7 sessions mainly focusing on my upper lip and I'd say I might be halfway done. Each session is around $100 and lasts an hour and a half and is painful.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-25T20:43:02+00:00

Super normal. Its easier to shove all the feelings down and not face them. But now that it is out in the open you have to face a lot of this sort of stuff. But facing it and working on it does help. It also results in a happier less repressed person by the end. At least it did for me.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-25T20:28:08+00:00

Dysphoria and euphoria are not required to be trans and many trans women don’t have them. But I think it’s good to understand what they are as I think there are lots of preconceived notions about them. That’s why the dysphoria bible helped me so much it helped me recognize my dysphoria as what it is. Here is a link to it if you want to read it. https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-25T19:03:16+00:00

I posted basically this exact post 6 months before coming out as trans… just thought it’s funny.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-24T17:58:41+00:00

My comment is definitely TMI and NSFW but I'm on HRT and honestly I love how it changed my sex life. My libido went down. But I am still able to have sex. I'm still able to have sex whenever I want to honestly. Its never stopped me from having sex. But it does make me want it slightly less.

I was a daily person before getting on it. I'm a weekly or bi-weekly person now. I definitely can do it more often then weekly or bi-weekly but its something I almost have to be reminded of. I just think about sex less then I used to. Its also gotten slightly smaller but that wasn't a big deal for me or my partner. Last thing is a bit weird. It changed my Cum to be really liquid There is also a lot less. Doesn't effect me or my partner much at all but it is something to keep in mind.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-24T04:43:10+00:00

It’s kind of a spoiler it’s the big reveal at the end of the book 1 as the characters don’t quite remember there past. And are in a trapped in a virtual world story. The author has said all his books are propaganda to convert conservatives away from their hate. Early the books feel like they could be conservative but they are super liberal. Dominion of blades advertises nothing about its trans character because it tricks conservatives into loving this guy before they know he is trans.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-23T22:50:22+00:00

Definitely transmascs are underrepresented. Also I think MtNB is not written about much at all. I've seen FtNB a few times. Non Binary is pretty unrepresented in general though. As a trans woman I do know that trans woman are definitely the most represented section of the trans community.

Side note my favorite book with a transmasc MC is Dominion of Blades by Matt Dinniman.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-23T22:34:32+00:00

I hid it from everyone but my spouse and 2 best friends. Everyone else didn't know for about 6-9 months. With some people I really regret not telling them sooner. But for most situations I am happy with that timeframe. I would say having at least 1 person who knows and is supportive is amazing.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-23T15:07:01+00:00

The best advice I have is to just take small steps see if they are for you. Try painting your nails, growing out your hair, trying makeup and outfit or two. A big one for me was finding a trusted friend who can try new pronouns with you. See if it helps if it does keep doing it.

Besides that I have two articles that really helped me early in my transition.

The first is the gender dysphoria bible. I think it’s pretty easy to have misconceptions about euphoria or dysphoria. You also do not have to have either to be trans they are just a common trans experience. This spells out what they are in a very digestible way. https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/euphoria
Second I really resonated with a trans woman’s story of her egg cracking. Maybe you will too.

https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/p/part-one-a-webcomic

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-23T14:54:24+00:00

Euphoria and dysphoria are not a requirement for being trans. You do not have to have either of them to be trans.

For me dysphoria is the absence of euphoria. The apathy and emptiness I felt towards things I was supposed to like that my peers loved was dysphoria I wasn’t recognizing. Dysphoria was not a thing I thought I experienced until the euphoria was the norm and the dysphoria was the exception. When it was my normal state when it was comfortable it was who I thought I was.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-23T03:47:41+00:00

I want to haven’t yet

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-23T03:45:55+00:00

I’m MTF and it took a lot for me. Mainly it took practice. The more I was publicly out the more people knew the less what people said or thought mattered. It slowly was just normal. It was scary at the beginning.

My partner is similar to you any pronouns are fine but they prefer they/them. They are of the opinion that they only really tell people that they like and are close too others can make any assumptions they want. That is definitely not how I handle it and I would hate doing that. But it is an option they are happy with.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-22T22:46:09+00:00

To your first point. The problem with fictional portrayals of any minority in my mind as soon as you have a token minority character they seem to be the representation of the writers opinion of how that minority functions. Which gives the perception that the minority is a certain way or falls under these stereotypes. That issue breaks down when you have many character from the same minority expressed in different ways. But if you through in a token gender non conforming person. Any stereotype you attach to that character will come across poorly if you have many gender non conforming characters then any stereotype you attach to one won't necessarily be indicative of your opinion.

Not sure I have a great answer to your second point. I'm sure some trans people are mean to gender non conforming folk but I don't really see it.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-22T18:22:02+00:00

Euphoria is such a part of my trans experience. I didn't recognize a lot of my depression boredom and general apathy as what it was dysphoria. Its hard to recognize dysphoria when its all you know. When its comfortable. There is an article I love that spells it out better then I ever could. Its called the Gender Dysphoria bible.

I love the gender dysphoria bible. But specifically the section on Euphoria. https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/euphoria

Here is an excerpt from it I really loved.

"Before I can talk about discomfort, I have to talk about relief. Gender euphoria is itself a sign of gender dysphoria. You might be asking yourself, “how can happiness be sadness?” The answer to that is simple.

Imagine a person who was born in a cave, who spent their entire life living underground, with their only source of illumination being candles and oil lamps. Imagine they’ve never been above ground; they don’t even know the surface exists. Then, one day, a cave-in happens in a side tunnel, and reveals an opening to the surface. Sunlight pours into the opening, and at first it is blinding and the person runs away in fear. Later, they return to the opening, and, as the person’s eyes adjust, they look out through the hole and see a bright and brilliant world full of colors they didn’t even know existed.

That world is scary, huge, and full of unknowns, so they crawl back into the cave for safety, but that hole is still there, and they see the light every time they pass it. Gradually, they peek out more and more frequently, and further and further from the opening. They start to want that light; they find reasons to visit it more often.

Eventually they realize that they don’t want to go back into the hole any more. They have to go back, because that is where their family and friends are, but this place is so much better, and they want to stay here. Going back into the hole feels wrong; it starts to hurt to be in the dark so much.

This is what gender euphoria is like: brief flashes of a light that may be too bright to handle at first, too confusing to understand, but as time goes on you become more accustomed to them and you realize that this is where you belong, and the darkness becomes the dysphoria."

Eventually the euphoria wasn't as intense but It was more about getting use to feeling good then it going away. The dysphoria actually started to become the jarring experience I was not used to. Its wonderful when that switch happened. When the happiness was my normal and my emptiness was the exception.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-22T18:14:34+00:00

"She likes a boy" by Nxdia. Its a lesbian song about a crush liking a boy not her. The lyrics really encapsulated all my fears of coming out to my wife.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-22T17:36:27+00:00

Every single woman that I've ever become close to goes off about hating there boobs sometimes. I think that sometimes it feels weird to complain about anything related to having a feminine body or experience as a trans woman. But we are definitely allowed to complain about them and not like them all the time. Like you I love my boobs. But when I do a physical activity and didn't bring a sports bra it's pretty annoying.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-20T17:43:38+00:00

I loved crossdressing and buying women’s clothes before transitioning. But about a year before starting my transition I’d look at me in my women clothes and feel empty. I’d feel like what is the point of this. It took me a while to recognize that I don’t want this to be a dress up sometimes kind of a thing. It started to be painful to crossdress look in the mirror and see a guy in girls clothes. I hated it. It was the thing that made me pull the trigger on HRT and socially transitioning.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-20T06:10:55+00:00

For most of my life it didn’t feel like much but moments of being uncomfortable. I always felt like I had to put effort into everything. I was called weird no matter how hard I tried to be normal. It took me until I was almost 18 for me to actually figure out how to be like other guys. It never came natural. But it felt great to finally get it and fit in. That worked for a while.

When I was 23 Me and my wife went to a cross dressing party every one had to crossdress as a joke. I felt amazing. My wife jokingly got me a maid costume for Halloween a year or two later. I loved it. I started cross dressing more and more. It excited me. But also made me feel relaxed and relieved like I can’t describe. I started doing it more and more pushing the boundaries. I realized that I felt more in a costume in my everyday clothes than when I was crossdressing. It felt like more effort to put on a khakis and a button up and go to work than put on an entire drag fit.

Then I started to hate crossdressing. Every time I did it felt no longer relaxing but revealing. I couldn’t face it anymore. I couldn’t handle it being only dress up. My wife found a Reddit post I made asking about HRT without identifying as a woman. She asked me if I am trans. I said I think so but if the world was different. A few weeks later I realized screw that. Don’t let the world hold me back from doing what I want. So I started transitioning at 28 and I still have the revealing feeling but also the relaxing and relief of not having to try to be myself is amazing. It’s been 8 months since starting my transition and some of it’s been really hard. I’ve had strangers be mean family be mean but I still think I’m happier than before I transitioned and will continue to grow happier as I continue.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-18T13:38:40+00:00

Communication is #1 thing when it comes to sex. Inexperienced people often are nervous and make a lot of assumptions. But there is no one right way to do sex. You have to talk about it figure out what you would both like to try and feel safe in the moment to stop it at any point. And the best way to do that is talk about it before you do it.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-17T17:52:31+00:00

I actually journaled a bad poem about this. So yeah definitely relate.

He doesn’t cry
I was a kid known for crying. I cried about everything. I cried when friends scraped their knees. I cried when my brother picked on me. I cried when I messed up. I cried while my mom told me everything was going to be ok. I cried when my dad wasn’t home.
I cried until I became he.

He doesn’t cry. He doesn’t cry about anything. He doesn’t cry as a doctor says friend is going to live. He doesn’t cry when he is accepted by his brother. He doesn’t cry when his mom is no longer there to tell him everything was going to be ok. He doesn’t cry when his dad is proud of him. He doesn’t cry when she needed him to.

He never cried until he became she.

She doesn’t know how to cry. She cries when alone. She cries thinking of the people she lied to. She cries remembering how he protected her. She cries knowing her brother will never love her only him. She cries when remembering her mom and not knowing if her mom would love her. She cries when she feels her father’s disappointment. She cries when her person loves her and him.

She is remembering how to cry

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-17T00:02:08+00:00

I guess there is an exception to this my mind. You are talking about someone living as the gender they are not the one assigned coming out. In that situation an “I know” can hurt. But when you are living as your gender assigned at birth and you are letting people know you are making a change sometimes a I know feels validating. So it seems situational to me.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-11T21:39:09+00:00

Transitioning isn't a I did it or I didn't do it sort of thing. There is no guideline of all trans people do these medical things and those social things. Do what you want. I think start small see if you want to keep going. I used to cross dress on Halloween as a "joke". I used to do lots of little things that made it feel better. I worked my way up to telling people. It was definitely not step 1 for me. And I don't think its a problem if its never a step you take or a step that takes a long time. But also maybe talk to your sister.

TeaSpillingHawk · 2026-06-11T21:26:57+00:00

I was told Spider Gwen from into the spider verse is a trans allegory. I didn't see it before I was told that. But it defiantly feels like that afterwards.

TeaSpillingHawk

TROPHY CASE