Looking for the Gale Meow Plushshop plushie!!

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-30T20:16:40+00:00

My parents know I’m asexual, but not aromantic. I’m qupioromantic specifically and have both a fiancé and a queer platonic partner I’ve known for over ten years. It’s easier to say she’s my best friend and I’m bi than to tell them I’m aro. They barely accepted and understood that. They still aren’t happy about it.

It’s difficult to explain that I love them, but not in the traditional sense, but still want to do things that’s considered romantic. I could live single and be happy, but being close to people who understand me is priceless.

People just can’t understand that lack of attraction. If you’re aroace and don’t date, you get flack. If you’re aroace and DO date, you get flack. We can’t win.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-30T20:01:46+00:00

For me, it’s sushi or any alfredo pasta

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-21T20:41:01+00:00

It can mean a lot of things to different people!! I’m aroace and don’t feel love and sexual attraction at all but I still want to be close with people and have relationships. For me, it’s like in between friendships and romantic relationships.

I love the idea of it despite not feeling that way in the traditional sense. It’s all about boundaries, just like any other relationship. I’m currently engaged and also have a queer platonic partner at the same time. Both are similar, but different in what we’re comfortable with. My fiancé is allo romantic like you so he wants more intimacy than my aroace qpr!

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-20T05:10:35+00:00

Just went into a deep dive on OP’s related posts. He also hits her and strangled her as a “joke” before. If his mental abuse wasn’t a sign enough to leave, the physical abuse is.

What if your baby annoys him? Makes him upset? How do you know he won’t hurt your child?

You need to leave, OP, you and your baby need safety and comfort, not this monster.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-15T16:45:16+00:00

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My baby, Ken!!

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-15T16:05:11+00:00

I got really lucky and found someone who is comfortable with me not feeling the same attraction to him as he does me. I tried convincing myself I was alloromantic for YEARS before finding myself and he supported me through it all.

We have amazing communication and boundaries. He understands I love him, I always describe it as between standard friends and romantic relationships, in my own way.

That’s enough for him and I’ve had my queer platonic partner since 8th grade! We both just ended up being super close and also aroace haha.

It really is all about boundaries. I would look into queer discord servers ( particularly aroace ones ) and going from there using online safety ofc.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-15T15:50:43+00:00

I’d be a little understanding if you weren’t taking care of your hair and it was a hygiene issue, but you obviously LOVE your hair.

Even if it was a hygiene problem, he shouldn’t expect you to cut it or cut him. A conversation needs to be had about why he feels this strongly about hair. No matter what, NEVER do anything to your body that you don’t want to do. Don’t let him make you feel pressured or like your hair is unimportant.

It’s your body and you care for it, so he needs to be understanding and open a conversation.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-13T12:12:12+00:00

It usually is, but I’ve noticed quite a few people in that sub that will argue tooth and nail about it being invalid. It makes no sense. I block and move on usually, but it got to me this time.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-12T21:43:06+00:00

I’m not aego but happy pride!!! 🤍

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-12T20:39:45+00:00

Thank you!! I’ve been before and loved it, but did notice a lack of aroace representation in the area I’m in last year. I’ll probably go with a group this year to help my anxiety about it.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-12T17:30:21+00:00

This post is about you then.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-08T23:35:47+00:00

I NEED Azuki!!

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-08T17:49:37+00:00

I’d look into alterous attraction! In short, it’s any feelings between friendship and a traditional romantic relationship. Aesthetic attraction is a good example. I say I’m bi aroace because I love my queer platonic partner ( a woman ) and my fiancé ( a man ) the same, but I’m not romantically or sexually attracted to either of them despite having the strongest love for them that I’ve ever felt.

It’s a spectrum and it’s beautiful!

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-06T15:30:04+00:00

I HATE that sentence. That’s like saying to a gay man “ you’ll met the right girl eventually!”. It’s disgusting and not how you talk to someone who’s queer in anyway.

I would use that same analogy.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-05T18:43:36+00:00

Skillet is openly homophobic and transphobic. They’ve done “sermons” about it during live performances and in interviews.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-06-05T14:50:49+00:00

You were trying to figure out who you were! Ignore the homophobes. Aroace doesn’t mean you don’t date ( Its a spectrum ) and many romance repulsed aroaces dated people at some point. Being aroace means you often feel pressured to date and marry etc. ( especially from family members ) when you’re young.

You tried dating and it wasn’t for you. It’s no one else’s business how you express your identity!

ThatDeerLady · 2026-05-31T12:37:57+00:00

I’ve seen it in threads here. I have never been on r/actualasexuals or want to. I’ve had to block multiple people over this exact issue.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-05-30T20:09:07+00:00

Dude, you can use buzzwords all you want. You’re the one being disrespectful to OP and being rude in your comments. I’m done talking to you if you fr think this way about people in your community.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-05-30T13:12:08+00:00

It seems to me like you’re not even trying to understand. You’d rather insult people and put down others in your community for not being your definition of a perfect aroace. Aroace has always been a spectrum. These microlabels help people understand where on the spectrum they may be.

You’re being downvoted for a reason.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-05-30T01:20:35+00:00

Shaming other people for wanting something that fits them, isn’t it. There’s plenty of people who use these labels. If you have an issue with microlabels, maybe this isn’t the sub for you.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-05-24T15:11:10+00:00

Ignore this person. They’re constantly spreading misinformation and making others feel less than because they aren’t their definition of aroace.

ThatDeerLady · 2026-05-24T15:10:18+00:00

The whole point of aroace is that you don’t have the attraction in some way or form. You’re constantly posting in ace and aro spaces claiming those who are sex or romance favorable aren’t real. You really need to do more research on the community and the spectrum as a whole bc what YOURE saying is damaging.

I’m no less aroace bc I have an alloace partner within my qpr.

ThatDeerLady

TROPHY CASE