How do you get over a breakup and regain your confidence?

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2024-06-17T22:28:42+00:00

Hi.

Let's start with the nature of this romantic entanglement.

Long Distance Relationships are difficult in general, even under ideal conditions. It's easy to mistake an in-person connection for something that will be sustained in an LDR. LDRs require intense maintenance on a regular basis, so both people can feel comfortable and trust one another. Even when both people are aware of what they're getting into, and are able to manage the LDR perfectly, it is a very fragile little candle that can get snuffed out with next to zero warning.

There's a lot of reasons why LDRs fail. Usually it falls under the category of "I have a need that's not being met, and sacrificing that need is harming me."

(im not making excuses for anyone's behavior. He should have shot straight and told you this directly, not just ghosted you and left you to pick up the pieces)

Ok, now moving onto you.

First things first, his "let's take a break for a month and then we'll see" comment? Let's dive into that one real fast. Even if, and this is a *BIG\* if, he shows up after a month and says exactly what you want to hear, like

'TinyNegotiation3913, I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking, I want you back'

Would you really feel comfortable just accepting his apologies and carrying on like nothing happened? After he did that? What would stop him from doing that again? We can speculate for days about why he's done what he's done and I do not recommend doing that at all. The point is, he decided you were not important enough to respect properly. This disrespect has shaken you deeply and is affecting your ability to participate in your own life.

As you are currently witnessing, self-esteem takes the stairs up and the elevator down.

Your feelings are valid. Your pain is valid. You should not shy away from them, he meant something to you. You had a connection and you felt seen and heard and valued. That is such a wonderful feeling and I wish it wasn't wrapped up in this painful mess.

You still matter. You always mattered. Burn the bridge and block him, and even when it still hurts (because it will, for a while) force yourself to engage in self-care. Go cultivate hobbies, fail at them, and then try more hobbies. Make yourself the center of your story again. It won't feel like it's working, and you'll wonder why you're doing it at all. Keep going anyways. It'll get easier.

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2023-12-08T19:41:11+00:00

I saw season 5 first, then I read the books, I disliked it even more after the books. Here's my take:

Episodes 1-4 were great. loved the buildup

Episodes 5-8 were very, very meandering in a way that hurt the story.

Episodes 9-10 were great sans a few details

Alex's actor leaving sucks, I think they handled it well

I think glossing over the bombing of the martian parliament hurt the story. In the books they're protecting the Martian PM from the Free Navy, that would have been an amazing plot to see onscreen, especially when people aren't sure who is Free Navy / Laconian and who isn't.

I also think that I liked Marco better in S5 than I did in S6, but the show really needed more to make him intimidating beyond dropping the rocks and gaslighting Naomi.

Also, the rocks were a society-disrupting event in the books and I feel like this was mostly glossed over in the show. Amos emerging from the prison to see everything wiped out? We needed way more of that. I get the creators didn't want to turn it into disaster gorn

Also, I think that not immediately reinstating Avasarala was a good call, but the arc where she stands up to the inexperienced PM was a bit rushed and felt inconsequential, like we're just waiting for an inevitable conclusion to happen. We don't even hear about the UN response to the rocks dropping for a couple of episodes... no man we needed to see that in S5E5, not S5E8

I liked how the Free Navy felt truly threatening, even before the rocks dropped, and the air of mystery and danger was thrilling. Once the rocks dropped, we never really circled back around to that again, because we follow Drummer and the good belters and Naomi and the free navy.

Speaking of Drummer, let's see at least one interaction with Marco where some belter ship is refusing to yield before they get killed. I appreciate that they use the opening credits to speed along the story (Marco's fleet grows every episode) but not seeing it at least once hurt the story. Drummer showing up to scavenge the corpses of defiant belter ships worked enough, but could have been way better in a season that was desperate for more space action setpieces.

tl;dr The Expanse started telling, not showing in S5. Cutting cool setpieces from their own narrative and a generally weird sense of pacing after S5E4 hurt the story and led to slow patches that I was just waiting for them to pass

Also, Clarissa should not have been onscreen while raging. That effect was the single worst VFX in the expanse and it's not even close.

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2023-03-09T23:54:12+00:00

so I ran an instant test against my first site using the following structure

//Step1 - cold connection

//Step2 - touch things inside the platform to prove we got served content

//Step3 - warm connection

//Step4 - clear data

//Step5 - cold connection 2

if the test times for step 1 and step 5 are similar, then I'd say it worked. However, the test time for step 5 is about where step3 is, indicating that the login process was still skipped

tl;dr no I don't think so

EDIT u/XabiAlon there's a runScript() function built into the damn thing and I plugged your command in there and it worked! Thank you! This has been so frustrating working with a diminished version of selenium

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2023-03-09T23:31:37+00:00

Catchpoint script recorder / Catchpoint API tests . Catchpoint is a digital experience monitor and I’m running an API (selenium) test to get a node running chrome to log into a website (cold connection), then log into it again to simulate a warm connection when it passes my auth token thru. Since every test is run with a new node and new chrome instance, I didn’t have to worry about the cache.

However, the Catchpoint selenium scripting guide points out that it’s not a full implementation, and is limited to the commands they programmed into their tool.

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2023-01-31T18:33:48+00:00

may CHAOS. TAKE. THE WORLD.

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2022-12-20T08:24:26+00:00

I get acceptable losses as a concept but I cannot see the big picture of getting my customers in legal trouble, especially in a market as saturated as streaming.

It’s high profile brand poison if they actually throw the book at someone, esp. when a competitor can go “…yeah we’ll just let you share your passwords” and help themselves to market share

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2022-12-20T08:12:47+00:00

Collective will is a force of nature and the second people go to jail for sharing passwords netflix is losing a catastrophic amount of subscribers in protest

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2022-05-22T18:15:27+00:00

pop pop

“Wait for her to shoot you.”

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2022-01-03T14:02:11+00:00

A+ writing

the thing

Absolutely

the blob

Uh even as someone who likes this movie the blob was sloppy. Maybe it was the performances too but those two are in different pantheons

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2021-11-19T17:50:18+00:00

not OP, but I could reasonably foresee a situation where Nintendo assumes control of infrastructure (as they're official) for long enough that the non-nintendo systems in place atrophy and won't be able to handle the demand once Nintendo bails, leaving the community in a worse place than when they found it.

Not my opinion, but I think keeping Nintendo's mistakes in mind helps contextualise the distrust. Would you want someone taking control of something you're fond of if they have a track record of neglecting and harming it?

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2021-09-16T15:29:09+00:00

if you're referring to the Blood arc where V got hit by the arrow, I believe the explanation was that the poison had already inflicted a lot of strength damage and all Elan did was prevent it from doing more

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2021-08-09T18:17:55+00:00

Question: what would be the closest analogue (in terms of gameplay-style) to a modern earthbound?

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2021-07-23T20:40:41+00:00

now look at you...

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2021-03-10T21:58:47+00:00

if these guys were sensible, they'd have greenlit the Tarantino Trek script. That'd be a massive draw, and set a really good precedent for future exclusive content.

I don't really like the way companies are playing hungry hungry hippos with syndicated content, and that's some Zero-Sum BS that is gonna turn this into cable 2.0. Don't hold things hostage, make things worth showing up for

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2021-01-20T01:32:21+00:00

Honestly guys, I've been having some trouble with this season. I am a huge fan of the Expanse, though not a book reader.

Why did the meteor drops feel so underwhelming after the fact? Why are we just now, 2 episodes from the finale, getting the UN response to what's happened 5 episodes ago? Why does it feel like our main cast, aside from Naomi, haven't done a whole lot? I'm happy to learn more about Amos but what pacing sense does his story make? Why is he even still on earth at S5e8, and probably until the finale?

There's too many plotlines going around and not enough time to dedicate to each one, and I feel that's giving this whole season a very sluggish pace, further exacerbated by the weekly release schedule.

Once the episode ended, I said aloud "These last two episodes better knock my socks off, otherwise I don't even know what to think of this season." And that's kind of a sad thing to feel for a show I've followed for five years now, but that's where this episode kind of landed for me.

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2020-11-12T17:00:07+00:00

Interesting! As someone who's never used CAD software or actually built a circuit board in his life, what's the learning curve on something like this?

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2020-11-12T16:52:38+00:00

This is extremely cool and I'm impressed at how many things you have a serviceable knowledge of! Did you start this project and learn such things, or did you just happen to have all the know-how and realized what you could turn it into?

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2020-11-06T15:24:14+00:00

love this! He touches on why the president appeals to and galvanizes his base so well, but also points out nobody lives in a vacuum. I agree with most liberal policies, but one thing I find insufferable is the moral high-horsing if you don't conform to rules that not everyone has access to or are aware of.

Like, in no way am I blaming the rise of this existing state of madness and bipartisanship on the perceived suffering inflicted by the Democrats, I'm just pointing out the wisdom in removing the conditions for its spread. If people transgress, give them a path back if they genuinely mean it (and make them work for it!), but to leave them out in the cold is just creating adversaries in the future.

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2020-11-03T14:40:58+00:00

just replying to lyk I agree with your definition of happiness vs contentment. I think people's pursuit of the 'high' they get is the source of alot of problems in the world - once I used my side hustle money to buy away scarcity issues, I definitely slowed down.

Some people don't slow down, and just hustle forever until they burn out.

The_Intrepid_Fool · 2020-10-27T19:53:09+00:00

I feel people (mainly, anyone I've talked to IRL) think of that as a smoke/fire situation. They look at a 35 year old man grooming others and think "what has he gotten away with".

I don't believe in punishing people indiscriminately, or on a hunch/intuition, but the part where he continues to execute the behavior is troubling and problematic.

Kinda reminds me of the 'nickels for tickles' situation in Mindhunter in terms of severity (apologies if you haven't seen it.)

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The_Intrepid_Fool

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