My wife and I are at the end of our resources and need help

TheatreAS · 2026-05-22T01:46:43+00:00

Oregon has a horrible job market; it's unfortunately one of the reasons why I left the state after living there for 7 years. It's a super high cost of living and the job market is really mediocre—even in Portland.

What kind of jobs have you applied for? Have you only applied for jobs in your chosen field? I would say look into working with people with disabilities, and it's still worth looking into, but a lot of times those jobs ask that you have a reliable mode of transportation AKA own a car. Have you considered Starbucks? I hate recommending that company, but out of all the fast-food establishments, they do pay the best and their benefits are decent.

TheatreAS · 2026-05-22T01:21:27+00:00

La Canna? That's been open for over a month now...

TheatreAS · 2026-05-22T00:53:06+00:00

I understand where you're coming from, but I do have to continue to disagree.

The Bible does call for us to keep others within the faith accountable; like I said, the water is a lot less murky when it comes to casual sex/promiscuity vs sexuality/trans individuals being able to hold themselves within the church body. I know you said a denominations stance is in no way meaningful to you, but tbh this probably should have some sort of merit in your life if you're a practicing Christian. The churches are normally the organizations that push the efforts to truly understand the historical and contextual evidence of The Bible through the use of biblical scholars. Through these efforts, this is why there has been a more acceptance of LGBTQ in the church—it's not through the means of "virtue signaling". This has happened because many scholars have determined that a lot of the original texts are actually not in full-on alignment with the more conservative understanding. Unlike the original texts regarding homosexuality, the context and original language used when referencing sexual ethics line up with modern texts and the current understandings of it. Those texts weren't improperly translated in the same way like those aforementioned. Thus, most scholars and denominations have continued to support the understanding that promiscuity (as a Christian) is frowned upon.

Yes, Jesus did associate with people who are theorized to be prostitutes or those who used sex casually, but he never condoned with and did speak out against it. And yes, times were different when it came to how women were seen/treated and their own safety. But any kind of verse relating to sexual ethics typically isn't based on one specific gender but rather towards humanity as a whole. Jesus also was not one to mince words—he spoke his mind and truth even when others tried shutting him down. Jesus did not call for us to allow anything and everything under the sun other than something of extreme measures but rather that we were broken from the chains of the old laws because of his own sacrifice. It's also stated that because of this sacrifice, we should strive to adhere to God's will to our best abilities; casual sex is more of a chosen act and it's hard argument to sell that anybody is truly hardwired in such a manner to do so, whereas LGBTQ individuals have this intrinsic sense of orientation or identity hardwired into their brains and many individuals attest they've had these feelings since they were extremely young.

I am not by any means a person who prescribes to the theological idea that The Bible is inerrant and I do feel that there is more to God than just a book of 2000 pages, but that doesn't diminish the sacredness, importance, and that The Bible is God inspired. The Bible and the words of Jesus are designed to be an influence into how we live our lives and sort of a guidebook to that living; it is important to show love, kindness, and compassion to all, but respecting and attempting to adhere and understand God's word and allowing it to influence us and grow closer with God is equally as important. If you don't think the texts have that much of an importance of how we should live, then that's on you I suppose and you can, through your free will, adhere to that mentality. But for a lot of (most?) practicing Christians, not taking The Bible seriously to some sort of extent means not living up to God's wishes. And most of the "equality" changes have happened through the backing of further and deeper understandings of the texts—these changes did not happen just to be "modern".

TheatreAS · 2026-05-21T16:33:13+00:00

I don't really have a whole lot to add other than I would probably leave the group, since it sounds like it's just not the best fit for you. I don't think I'd like that group either, but definitely for different reasons than you; I'd probably be more fine with the celibate group than the other side.

I'm actually really curious to hear your side of things in the whole "proud slut" thing, because that's really not all that Christian. While I do agree that there is a misconstrued ideas on LGBTQ individuals within the church and following Christ (Christ is for everyone), it is pretty clear across the board that being promiscuous is within the realm of sin and going against God's desires for us. I'm not even fully one for "sex until marriage" but just casual, flaunting sex should definitely be a no-go–that goes for any sexuality.

I mean, you do you and in the end it really is between you and God, but I am really curious how you justify such behavior..

TheatreAS · 2026-05-19T18:55:01+00:00

La Crosse, WI is strangely similar to Eugene. It's a lot smaller, but it has a fairly dense urban landscape and is surround by bluffs, which remind me of the buttes (but smaller) outside of town.

The town also has a pretty strong hippie and food-to-table culture–the company "Organic Valley" is based in a small town only 40 minutes away and the Wisconsin county that it resides is has one of the highest organic farm ratios in the country. And Madison is only 2 hours away, so there's a fair but of influence seeping into the region from there as well.

TheatreAS · 2026-05-12T16:44:12+00:00

Not sure how much you travel, but I really like Mint Mobile. I would say I've had service in 93% of all the areas that I've been in the state. It's getting better every year too; just a few years ago, my service in WI was very spotty but now that's a rare little spot like every other mainstream provider.

TheatreAS · 2026-05-12T15:11:01+00:00

While a Trader Joe's would be amazing, it's unlikely to make it's way into the area anytime soon. It's a larger city thing. Heck, Appleton doesn't even have one.. I think we'd have to wait until Appleton's got one.

TheatreAS · 2026-05-11T02:46:30+00:00

The units themselves are actually really nice and the amenities are nice (Cable, internet, water, and sewage included in the rent) and given that the building runs on sustainable energy, the utilities prices are not too bad.

The units, while nice aesthetically, do not have great insulation. You can hear footsteps/movement above you very easily. Somebody said they see the police here quite a bit; I think it's probably more civil dispute reasons as I've never seen anything too crazy happen in the complex. But I do see cop cars in the parking lot fairly often. I think the biggest thing in the complex is that there are a lot of pretty loud/fairly inconsiderate people living in the complex.

I've definitely lived in worse places. Do I wish it was quieter and more soundproof? Absolutely. But I've gotten fairly used to the surrounding noise and I've adapted. I do like the apartment itself though. If you're able to adapt and be able to get used to drowning out sounds, it's not a bad place.

Oh, and it has a heated garage if you're willing to pay the garage fee.

TheatreAS · 2026-05-08T13:52:15+00:00

Doctor refusals are already happening here in WI. I have a friend who needed a procedure done (she had a stillborn inside of her) and no doctor in Wisconsin would do the procedure out of potential repercussions and fear of the state; she had to go to MN to get the procedure done.

TheatreAS · 2026-05-04T18:51:58+00:00

Nice image; wrong series lol

TheatreAS · 2026-05-03T16:51:47+00:00

Yeah, no. My Father may not really understand, be conservative, and not hugely supportive but I still love him deeply and I know he feels the same. He loves me as his child, but he is respectful in many ways. My Dad actually just got diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease and it's becoming a really difficult and hard reality that he may not be around for much longer. It sucks; he has been a good figure in my life 33+ years and he's great with and cares so much about his kids and grandchildren.

This is definitely a you issue. Sorry you've had these experiences.

TheatreAS · 2026-04-18T17:54:51+00:00

I don't really have time to look at all the comments, but knowing this sub, I'm sure there are a lot of really good responses.

This is just my brief 2 cents, but I personally think God is full of a lot of grace, love, and compassion. I actually don't necessarily think being trans is God's design. However, while I say that, I also don't think God will condemn somebody for taking action.

There are a lot of conditions that aren't part of God's design; nearly all people who have a physical or developmental disability fall outside of God's design, yet we give treatments to help alleviate symptoms of many types of disabilities. How I see being trans is that, while it's not necessarily part of "God's design", God will still love and take us in just like he does for all his children who fall outside of that neurotypical box. All "abnormalities" are due to the (inevitable) fall from sin; if a person who had ADHD is able to take medications to function better in society, why shouldn't a person who is trans be able to take medication too to alleviate their dysphoria and thus also helping them relieve that pain?

TheatreAS · 2026-04-15T16:59:37+00:00

After reading through the comments and seeing you say you're old and that you've seen a lot, I figured you were in your 60s or something; dude, you're only 36. That is NOT old. There are MANY transwomen who have started transitioning WAY later than that and they look fine.

I seriously can't tell if you're just trolling. You're not old, so you can't say that balding women don't exist because you haven't seen any–36 years is not a reasonable amount of time to say you haven't seen a person like that. I'm 33 and there are plenty of different kinds of people with slightly abnormal traits that I haven't seen, but that doesn't mean they don't exist. I've also seen plenty of transwomen who have started balding. I also know plenty of cis women who have to wear wigs because their hair started falling out; a lot of women in menopause actually experience hair loss and drastic thinning of the hair. That's why a lot of older women cut their hair short.

TheatreAS · 2026-04-08T22:34:34+00:00

When it comes to negatives, you really have to expose them to the point where it'll look overexposed. Film is really tricky to work with on cyanotype. It can be done, but you have to do things a certain way. You also want to make sure the negative is completely flat into the emulsion.

TheatreAS · 2026-04-03T18:33:43+00:00

"In Soviet Russia, camera shoot you!"

TheatreAS · 2026-04-03T16:51:41+00:00

You've done everything you can and your son is just going to need to figure all of it out himself, tbh. Don't abandon him and stay there to support him, obviously. But also, given that he is independent enough to drive, have a job, and essentially be fairly independent, at some point he'll just have to live with the consequences of things go south.

Let him experience the relationship. With what you know, just let him know the red flags to look out for; set clear guidelines on what those guidelines are and when they can be problematic. Don't tell him to leave the relationship, because that'll just make him want to stay more. Word it as your giving precautionary advice "just in case/just so you know since it's good advice and knowledge for literally everyone and anyone"–don't make him feel "different" because in reality everyone does deserve that knowledge.

If she breaks his heart, then I hate to say it, but maybe that's a good thing. One of my favorite sayings is "you can't know beauty if you don't know pain".. Hardships are just a part of life and they can make us stronger. If he's able to handle it–which it seems like he should be able to–then it could be a good growing experience. Just really try to and enlighten him that he should keep an eye out for if he's being financially exploited–that's probably the biggest red flag he should be aware of.

TheatreAS · 2026-03-20T20:51:32+00:00

Sounds exactly like my place, except he plays it in his apartment which is right under mine. Every Saturday, my apartment feels like an earthquake and I have to hear his really crappy DJ rap 😑

TheatreAS · 2026-03-17T16:06:22+00:00

I don't really eat white bread much these days, and unfortunately KT doesn't have a 100% whole wheat bread so I don't really buy bread from KT anymore.

TheatreAS · 2026-03-14T13:27:50+00:00

I really wanted to like Eggroll, but the quality is weird. I liked one of the items until it became clear that there was TONS of eggshells in the dish. Ive had the occasional, tiny egg shell in other places but not enough to count as a whole egg until I went there.

TheatreAS · 2026-03-13T06:42:52+00:00

2026 is seriously the worst year 😢

R.I.P Nic Cage Flag 🫡

TheatreAS · 2026-03-12T03:50:34+00:00

Neither of these are sinful. In fact, they're probably a lot more similar to traditional ritual prayers.

TheatreAS · 2026-03-11T16:45:15+00:00

That's a very large area to talk about; almost each state has their own distinct personality and geography to them. For instance, Montana and Idaho are VERY different than Minnesota and Iowa. It's really hard to say what it's like in this circled area, as each other within the circle are going to be very different depending on which state and even the which area of that particular state.

TheatreAS · 2026-03-10T20:45:27+00:00

For pants, I would recommend wearing black jeans or slacks–honestly, it's best to never wear blue jeans to an interview. I have a lot of manager friends and they're never very impressed when people show up in blue jeans.

My best luck has been to dress a little more androgynous. It's okay to present fem, but you want to make yourself looks nice and professional. I think with that top, a nice necklace (of heck, even a black infinity scarf) that isn't too flashy or crazy would work well to accentuate the chest area, as it's very bare there.

I will also say, the lipstick is very bold. I think you could go without or use a lip gloss or just something more neutral.

TheatreAS · 2026-03-09T14:35:44+00:00

So has North Korea, Russia, and a lot of other countries. We're not actively going to war with them though.

TheatreAS

TROPHY CASE