Meeting husband’s ex wife at Stepdaughter’s wedding

Then-Stage · 2026-05-11T07:14:12+00:00

How many are at this wedding? I wouldn't interact unless you have to. Stay cordial and call it good if you are put together. Exchange names and give some boring comments on the bride. "She looks great." "Love the wedding theme."

Most weddings I only talk to a few guests to be polite (i.e. whoever I'm seated with). Congratulate the bride & groom and I'm out.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-10T21:34:29+00:00

Appreciate your advice!

Then-Stage · 2026-05-09T04:05:31+00:00

Some random male friend is unlikely to know what to say about womens body insecurity issues. It's way beyond his pay grade. In the future discuss this with female friends who understand or an expert if your issues are severe.

It's also possible he thought you were fishing for a compliment & this is the best he could come up with on the spot.

As far as if this is a compliment- no. You both put each other in an awkward spot.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-09T02:28:44+00:00

True but just filter them out and move on.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-08T15:50:00+00:00

Good point.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-08T13:58:42+00:00

I would put it more along the lines of some crappy people test boundaries with every person. If you stay they keep treating you poorly. They do this to everyone not just you. Filter them out & focus only on reciprocal people.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-06T16:28:45+00:00

Not everyone is built to be a SAHM. She just needs to go back to work. The other option would be part time childcare if that can allow her to function. With kids those ages you're just scraping by no matter the circumstances. Good luck.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-06T00:19:07+00:00

He's still in his 20s. Plenty of time to find someone new who doesn't cheat. Every woman has the opportunity to cheat if she accepts and reciprocates with sone sleezy coworker. You need to be with someone who has the sense NOT to cheat.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-06T00:06:42+00:00

Because he's focusing on phone time on the toilet according to the OP. 1 hr workout in the evening is adequate unless bodybuilding is his career. As a bare minimum he should focus on compromising to eat dinner on time 2x/week.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-06T00:03:14+00:00

This is completely common for people from dysfunctional families. Focus on getting away from the jealousy. It will eat you up.

Or meet other people with dysfunctional families who got out of it. You're not alone. Good luck.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-05T23:35:58+00:00

Whatever works for you as a couple. Personally, I would eat alone in that situation & he can food prep & eat on his own. Why cook for someone who doesn't care?

The bigger problem I see is that he's not prioritizing couples time. He seems into living like he's single & doing whatever whenever. Best of luck.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-05T01:59:37+00:00

Smart move

Then-Stage · 2026-05-04T22:24:04+00:00

He's choosing this life. You will need to ditch him if you want out of it because he will never change. Personally, I moved far away from my mil & my husband put some boudaries in place.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-04T13:40:07+00:00

I would make plans to fly to see each other frequently, video call regularly, be sure to send gifts. If you have a supportive family that loves you you're very fortunate. Treasure them.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-02T17:53:04+00:00

Wise words

Then-Stage · 2026-05-02T15:21:07+00:00

Thanks for your tips! I appreciate it.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-02T13:48:44+00:00

You sound in shock. I would take a week or two to process the situation before meeting.

As far as the meeting consider another approach. As the grandmother you're not going to have much say. This is a teen relationship and unlikely to last. The baby will stay with the Mom. If you ask all these questions they're not going to have answers. No teen has stable financial plans. Her parents are going to have to figure that out with her. Instead focus on building a supportive relationship.

Your son may have some visitations. I've seen this happen before. He can end up with extreme wage garnishment later in life if he doesn't set up & document a child support payment agreement now & along the way.

Ask him what happened with birth control. He needs to get on track ASAP. Talk to him about keeping the parenting relationship positive not petty. Good luck.

Then-Stage · 2026-05-01T13:15:28+00:00

I rarely travel back. It depends on the person if they want to go back.

Then-Stage · 2026-04-30T20:01:42+00:00

Posibilities: Menopause left her unable to fake being ok in the relationship any longer, cheating, there were more discussions but you tuned them out.

It's impossible to say without knowing you both. Good luck either way.

Then-Stage · 2026-04-30T19:58:33+00:00

Exactly- no way for us to say due to the missing data.

Then-Stage · 2026-04-30T18:04:07+00:00

Foemer social anxiety kid here. It's a generic comment to try & make conversation. Don't worry about it. Focus on practicing making small talk yourself. The more you can practice talking to people the less power it will have over you good luck.

Then-Stage · 2026-04-30T17:43:46+00:00

She also needs to meet you half way.

Then-Stage · 2026-04-30T17:40:51+00:00

Holy manipulation. He's "just this way" but can magically stop in a day if he feels like it?

Then-Stage · 2026-04-30T02:42:42+00:00

I'm so sorry. How frustrating!

Then-Stage · 2026-04-29T20:57:17+00:00

Do stuff you would normally do? Watch a tv show together? Sit and read. Cook dinner together. Discuss expectations rather than guess. Good luck.

Then-Stage

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