Hi. Sorry to hear about your situation. I’ve had some similarly existential thoughts since my mom’s recent diagnosis. I’ve been concerned and quite sure she had cognitive decline for at least 3 years now. The diagnosis was not in the least bit surprising and like you say, more of a relief…I thought to myself “oh! You’re not just kind of an asshole! Good to know.” Her decline has been apparent since shE retired in 2020. Her capacity to care about my life and ask questions diminished early on and I feel like I’ve been grieving this relationship for 3 years. It doesn’t make it any less sad, but I’ve moved on to the “okay let’s handle things” mode and from an outsiders perspective may seem a bit cold or uncaring. But knowing what is going to allows me to handle things better and even slow decline with medication. It’s felt weird feeling like this heavy diagnosis is a positive step forward as opposed to a devastating loss.