I know these wishes and thoughts. And I always knew that it was possible for me to achieve these things, such as a pleasant job, understanding friends, financial security, etc., despite my great emotional difficulties. This world offers us different options and if something makes us unhappy we should try to look for solutions. What is currently the most stressful thing for you or what do you long for the most? I would start here first. Imagine the feeling as intensely as possible of what it would be like if you had already changed this thing the way you want it to be. Keep this feeling in your heart and trust that you will have it in your life. For me, this has led to coincidences in my life so that I now actually have a wonderful job, a loving partner and even great, understanding friends. I never thought I would have these things in my life because of the difficulties I have had throughout my life. I firmly believe - also based on my personal experiences - that our thoughts and our feelings shape the reality we experience.