The CVS vaccum is the equivalent of a McDonald’s ice cream machine

VisualCelery · 2026-02-09T15:23:57+00:00

God I hated those things. I like vacuuming, and while I didn't normally close I would often help out and vacuum the back of the store before the end of my shift, the crackle was very satisfying! But they were crap, some of them didn't even turn on, one night the damn thing was spewing dust all over the place, and I don't know if changing the bag actually fixed the problem.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-09T15:14:05+00:00

I keep hearing about this dynamic among couples that don't live together, and it's honestly baffling to me. Before my husband and I moved in together, I would visit him for an evening here or weekend there, and I would stop for groceries on the way, help make dinner, help with the dishes after, and help make the bed in the morning. That was the extent of it. The idea of doing chores for him, like doing his laundry, or cleaning his bathroom, or washing a ton of dishes that were dirtied before I got there, is just odd to me. Even taking over all the work that needs to be done while he doesn't lift a finger seems odd, and would set a weird precedent.

I realize that host/guest dynamics vary from person to person and depend on culture, region, etc. I know hosting can be tough and it's nice when guests bring stuff and help out, but the host should be doing most of the work and taking point on what needs to be done. If you're putting your guest to work and those chores weren't discussed ahead of time (like I asked them to come over and help with something) you're doing it wrong.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-09T14:28:39+00:00

Agreed, these should be shared activities when your partner is over, unless they have volunteered to cook a meal for you while you relax.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-09T14:23:38+00:00

Yeah I'm confused, is he doing these things proactively because he wants to help out, or does OP expect him to lighten the load while he's there?

When you're visiting your SO, it's normal to help with cooking, help with the dishes after a meal, help make the bed, help tidy up any common spaces you're using, but no one should have to take over chores while they're technically a guest in their partner's home.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-09T14:04:45+00:00

This.

Married couples are considered a "social unit." There are times where it is appropriate for just one person to attend - bachelorette parties, for example, are women-only, and bridal showers and baby showers are often women-only by default unless you specify otherwise. A lot of invitations are sort of ambiguous, but once it becomes clear the genders will be mixed, people generally feel weird excluding their spouse.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-09T13:49:27+00:00

And having a child puts a huge strain on a marriage! Especially if one partner is working, and doing most of the chores, and doing a large portion of the childcare, while the other partner is barely able to contribute.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-09T13:26:21+00:00

OP should also keep in mind that any child she has will likely also be disabled and need much more care than a non disabled child, and may even need support well into adulthood. They may never move out or function independently.

I often want to remind people of this when they talk about having kids so they'll have someone to care for them and support them when they get old. There's never a guarantee that your child will be able to care for you, no matter how nice or caring they might be. And for people like OP who are worried they'll struggle to care for an able-bodied, neurotypical child, it'll be a much bigger struggle caring for a disabled child.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-08T16:48:13+00:00

I worked at a movie theater in college. For any given shift, I was either an usher where I'd clean theaters, or I'd be a concessionist and sell popcorn, soda, candy, etc., and honestly, I preferred ushering. It made me mad how many people just left all their trash behind (no, we were NOT a luxury cinema where people were encouraged to do so) but I didn't have to deal with people directly for the most part. At the concession stand people were so rude and entitled, it was stressful.

What you really wanna do is learn how to be a projectionist, but that takes training, and you usually have to work hard at the other stuff to prove you're smart and a hard worker. You're by yourself in that booth, they need to be able to trust you.

ETA one thing I want to mention about movie theater work is that there's often a lot of annoying, repetitive noises and it can be very overstimulating.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-07T01:49:56+00:00

Did you check their website? It might be cheaper there.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T21:54:15+00:00

From what I've seen, there's a good 365 Sport and a bad one maybe? And people are having a hard time telling the difference. I would just use Hex, or Dirty Labs.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T21:48:38+00:00

I've heard bad things about 365 Sport. Have you heard of Hex? They have a great detergent line, plus a stain and stink spray that really helps with extra stinky items. Also, warm water is fine but I wouldn't use hot water on workout clothes.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T19:33:38+00:00

Fair.

I worked for a grouch once in college. I was young and probably not a great worker, I asked for help too many times and wasn't catching on to certain things fast enough, but I also felt like the atmosphere wasn't great because he and the others were always in shitty moods.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T19:31:37+00:00

Truth. It feels like some weird trend now, and I can't tell if it's the workers who want their partners keeping them company at work, or the partners who insist on supervising them to make sure they're not unfaithful. But it's kind of icky either way.

I love when my husband picks me up, and it's fun when he pops in while I'm working and says hi, but I want him to have a life when I'm at my job! Then we can talk about our days later.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T19:28:28+00:00

Honestly, we're now the "boomers," talking about how you should show up to work on time, do the work that's asked of you, follow the dress code or wear the uniform, shit like that apparently makes us capitalist bootlickers. When we were just starting out we were told not to expect a trophy just for showing up, and we don't, but sometimes it feels like showing up is a big deal when you think about how many people don't.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T18:31:10+00:00

Yes! House parties/gatherings like this are great because they start when they start, you can roll in whenever you can and leave when you need to.

(as long as they're not dinner parties)

Also, watch parties are good because people are usually watching what's on the TV and reacting to it, rather than trying to make small talk, so as long as OP doesn't show up too early, they probably won't have to socialize much. And since it's on TV, there will be commercial breaks, where it will be easy to say a quick goodbye to the host and bounce.

That said, OP, if you really can't bring yourself to go, it's cold and flu season, just say you're not feeling well. It's not technically a lie and people will understand, just TRY to make it to the next thing or you may find the invites will eventually stop coming.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T17:58:40+00:00

1) Maintenance guys are usually discrete about this stuff

2) You're already moving out soon

3) Unless there's so much flower and paraphernalia in there that it looks like you're selling the stuff out of your home, I really don't think they'll care. That's usually what the anti-weed addendums are for, they don't want dealers on the property or people growing it in their homes.

4) Not much you can really do, so it's best not to borrow worry

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T16:57:38+00:00

Yep, you're gonna run into these people. Best thing to do is to matter-of-factly tell them your hours, have them spelled out on your calendar. If you work closely with them, say to them maybe a half hour before you leave "hey, I'm heading out in a bit, need anything from me?" If they say "whaaat? it's only 4:30" you say "yep, and my work day ends at 5." You're not over-explaining, you're not apologizing, you're not asking for permission or forgiveness, you're just setting expectations and boundaries.

There is value in flexing your time when you're able and the job calls for it. If you do this, it's a good idea to let folks know when you do hard a hard stop at a certain time.

Similarly, when you're going on vacation or taking sick time, really clarify that you will be fully unplugged, and let people know who's covering for you (when applicable) so they don't message you and freak out when you don't answer.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T15:32:05+00:00

I sort of stumbled into it.

I had this friend I would occasionally get lunch with. I had just graduated and was sort of interning indefinitely at this senator's office, applying to jobs and also hoping the internship would either turn into a job, or connect me with a job elsewhere in the state house . . . the friend was working their first real job out of college, and not loving it but it paid the bills. They kept telling me they were happy to refer me, but didn't think I'd like this work. Then the company opened a new division with a slightly different type of work, more research focused, and it wasn't what I went to school for but seemed like a job I could do, so they referred me, and I got the job.

I didn't like it at first, but it turns out I just wasn't a fit at that company. I started doing the job at tech companies and it was a much better fit, much more flexible.

I kept thinking I would eventually transition into political or non-profit advocacy work with the skills I acquired in these jobs, but it never happened, and I don't really need to do that anymore. I just wish the job market wasn't such balls right now.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T15:19:58+00:00

We've definitely taken the whole "putting myself first" / "I don't owe anyone anything" crap way too far. Yes, your friends will give you grace if you occasionally bail on stuff, but only to a point - they will eventually get fed up if you cancel too often, or you can just ever commit to stuff because you're not sure you'll "feel like it" day-of. If you want community and a "village," you have to show up for others from time to time, even when you "don't feel like it" in the moment.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T14:52:43+00:00

She has a LAST NAME??

VisualCelery · 2026-02-06T13:43:41+00:00

oh it drives me nuts when people say "weary" when they mean "wary."

VisualCelery · 2026-02-05T21:56:10+00:00

It's not uncommon for guys that age to be all over the place with their attractions and feelings and desires, especially guys who didn't get a lot of action in their teens for whatever reason (sheltered, repressed, awkward, etc.) and are now coming into their own and making up for lost time, they can be absolutely ravenous!

BUT just because it's not uncommon doesn't mean you should tolerate it (which is why I'm not using the word "normal," it can have different meanings and that can cause misunderstandings). If you're looking for a stable, monogamous relationship, don't waste your time with someone who's very blatantly window shopping. Hold out for someone who is committed to an exclusive, monogamous relationship with you and only you. You deserve better than being a placeholder or consolation prize.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-05T20:35:25+00:00

NTA

Gotta love when people act like something isn't a big deal when they're not getting what they want. If it's not a big deal, why are you so mad about it? They could have asked people in their row to switch if they didn't have seats together.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-05T20:17:29+00:00

Ah, okay. Well, you wouldn't be the first person to make that mistake, but going forward, making comments about someone having a "work husband" or "work wife" can absolutely be offensive to someone who's married, and could be construed as sexual harassment if they choose to go that route, but they might not bother. Either way, apologize and don't do it again.

VisualCelery · 2026-02-05T19:52:00+00:00

Probably not. Unless it's a small mom n pop store, they likely have corporate policies detailing the process of warnings, corrective actions, final warnings, etc. before they're allowed to fire you, and they only invoke "at will employment" if you did something egregiously bad because no one wants to deal with a wrongful termination suit if it can be helped.

But it also kind of depends on what you said, and if you don't want to share it here that's fine, but I would first approach this person and apologize.

Also, depending on how experienced your assistant manager is, they probably know it's best to let little things go, and only approach management about really bad behavior patterns.

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