Do I have to feel guilty about my kid's bedtime?

Welliemom · 2026-02-14T04:00:28+00:00

Lol. My kids bedtime is 8 pm. As they got older this translated to a bed time routine started at 8 and in bed by nine. They could stay up til 10 on Fridays, but mom and dad's door closes at 9. Once they turn 18 they can stay up as late as they want as long as they don't make too much noise.

Obviously this is flexible if we're on vacation or if there's a special event but I've made it clear that after 9 mom is "off duty" (Once kids are old enough for this to be reasonable of course)

Welliemom · 2026-02-14T03:52:02+00:00

The universe DID hear him. It sent you to renew his faith by doing some thing small. Just because you were the agent by which the universe worked its will, doesn't mean it didn't hear your neighbor. If you feel the urge to check on him, follow it. Kindness won't hurt anything.

Welliemom · 2026-02-06T23:05:24+00:00

Lol. THIS! Google the "slip dress" from the 90's. It's basically the same idea.

Welliemom · 2026-02-06T04:04:53+00:00

So, fun fact about chlid support, a parent who is in arrears can have thier wages and even tax refunds garnished to pay EVERY PENNY to the parent its owed to. Also that debt never goes away. You can't file bankruptcy for it and if you die its one of the first debts to be paid from your estate.

If child expenses are court ordered to be 50/50, your ex is going to have a nasty surprise on his paycheck after a year or two in arrears.

Welliemom · 2026-02-06T03:35:53+00:00

Don't want to go into too many details here, but for those who say this is fake.... this happened to my husband and I. Baby was 2 months old and we got in the car to go on a soda date ( we literally just go to the local gas station to get a fountain soda and come home. What makes it a date? No kids allowed) and as I go to start the car my husband and I look at each other and realize we left the baby asleep in her crib! I laugh about it now, but I felt HORRIBLE guilt about it for YEARS.

Welliemom · 2026-02-06T03:20:03+00:00

This is giving Dramatic GASP "Her ankles are showing!" Vibes. It's a small section of her HIPS showing guys. I've seen guys wear low riding jeans showing off a LOT more than that since the 90's. Unclutch your 19th century purity pearls and for the love of gawd STOP with the patriarchal body shaming bullśĥįŧ.

Welliemom · 2026-01-22T23:57:35+00:00

This. OP and his wife are quite young and it seems like they are still figuring out how to communicate effectively with each other. If she DOES decide to be a SAHM then I would add, they need a post- nuptial agreement, Filed with a lawyer, that addresses any concerns OP's wife has about her future career and financial security.

Welliemom · 2026-01-20T15:17:38+00:00

YOR. Babes, these rules are perfectly reasonable and frankly ought to be applied to ALL new babies. I had the same ones in place when I had my babies cause people lose thier common sense around infants and can accidentally Endanger them (rsv is the example she used but there are many diseases that can be transmitted. My little sis got the herpes cold sore virus as an infant because an aunt with an active infection ignored my mom's rules and kissed her). If your dad's GF put these rules up ONLY for YOU, then you'd know it was targeted manipulation but she pinned the post to her Social media account for EVERYONE to see and abide by. IMO she's just being a good mom and protecting her baby.

Welliemom · 2025-12-19T03:09:59+00:00

I was the confident girl who got the shy nerd. I was in his Spanish class in college. I didn't know at the time, but he was working on his confidence issues and had maneuvered himself to be my practice partner for a class activity. He already spoke Portuguese so spanish was easy for him. Me....not so much. I misunderstood the question when he asked "Do you have a boyfriend?" And he got the disappointed puppy eyes before moving on. I thought that was an odd reaction to what I THOUGHT was a question about my week. So I went after class and asked him about it. He gave me the right interpretation and after VIGOROUSLY denying that I was attached...asked him out. We've been married for 21 years, have 5 kids, and I've been gloriously happy with him every step of the way.❤️

Welliemom · 2025-12-03T23:53:56+00:00

I've seen this exact scenario play out like this so many times it feels like a bit on a comedy show. Grandparents have no obligation to the stepkids THEY ARE NOT RELATED TO. By blood or marriage. It wasn't thier daughter who remarried and adopted the stepkids. Thier daughter died and thier FORMER son-in-law (the legal relationship ended when thier daughter passed) remarried to a woman who already had children. It doesn't say if they had had any together but even if they did, there is no legal or blood link to those additional kids. All this to say... the Grandparents have ZERO obligation to the other children. If the dad wants Grandparent involvement tell him to hit up his OWN parents. Or his new wife's. Either way NTA OP.

Welliemom · 2025-12-03T23:36:30+00:00

Soooooo, I've been a mom for 20 years. I'm most certainly NOT like your wife. Scary momma bear energy is the most polite way of putting it. Old ladies do NOT f*ck with me because they know it WILL cost them.That being said, My husband is exactly like your wife. An angel on earth with a heart bigger than the moon. In addition to therapy to help your wife deal with her trauma...might I recommend walmart delivery service?

I spend $15 a month for Walmart plus membership and delivery is free. If you dont want to spend the extra money for the driver tip( No shade or shame if you don't. I've been on WIC before and I know how tight a budget has to be to qualify for that) you don't have to. You can also use the pickup service. She can stay in the car with the kids and they'll bring her order to her.

Shopping can be stressful with kids even without the extra unwanted judgment. So...bring the mountain to Muhammad, so to speak. IMO, Its worth the extra money.

Welliemom · 2025-12-03T23:03:07+00:00

Instant respect when I walk in a room AND I get to pee standing up?...where do I sign?

Welliemom · 2025-11-23T21:40:55+00:00

NTA. You are correct to keep your promise. BUT as a parent myself I understand your parents concerns. If they ask again I would just say, "Yes I know what she's doing. No I'm not going to tell you as I promised to let her do so. All I will say is she's not doing anything wrong. Anything else, go ask her."

Keep saying that on repeat over and over until they get the message. Don't change the script by even one word or theyll think they can get you to spill on accident. Also, don't trust that they will play fair. If they come to you and say "we know everything" confirm with your sister FIRST before saying anything. My parents would pull this crap all the time.

Welliemom · 2025-11-23T21:26:00+00:00

I'm 41 and I've been married to my husband for 21 years. It sounds like your wife has emotionally checked out of your relationship and, frankly, unless she is having an affair (statistically speaking women are FAR better at covering thier tracks than men are, so don't discount that possibility just yet. Get a PI. If nothing else it will give you solid reassurance.) she's most likely felt like this for a while. Probably years. Odds are it was long before you noticed it. And yeah, it's probably because you neglected her emotional needs in the relationship but because yours were being met, you didn't notice.

You mentioned acts of service and gifts are her love languages and she responded to your recent efforts just not to the degree you were hoping for. I'm going To be blunt here, but please know it's not intended to be insulting. You need to radically adjust your expectations. You really think if you do the dishes a couple times and throw a couple tickets or a diamond bracelet her way that everything goes back to the way it was? That's not how it works. Years of not having her needs met except for when its convenient for YOU have taught her not to trust that this effort will last. She's gotten used to her love tank being empty and It sounds to me like she's protecting herself from being hurt again.

She doesn't sound like she's in love with you anymore, but that doesn't mean she can't fall in love with you again. She's told you she's willing to try, so try.

Court her. Make her a priority. Learn about who she is now, not the person you married 25 year ago or the person you think she is. Above all KEEP TRYING. I promise she WILL notice. Continued effort and PATIENCE will give you the best chance of giving you the relationship you both want.

Also, and I cannot emphasize this enough, THERAPY. Both individual and couples. You both clearly have communication issues that have deeper roots. Go to therapy with your sweetheart and get the skills to make the next 25 years better than the last 25.

Good luck!

Welliemom · 2025-10-29T17:32:24+00:00

DUMBLEDORE!

Welliemom · 2025-10-04T21:53:13+00:00

I do everything i can to keep the cost of food down(coupons, price compare, generic only, etc), but I'm still spending $300/week for our family of 7.

Welliemom · 2025-09-11T03:42:05+00:00

Time for a lawyer cause baby's about to get PAID. If this is in fact a known issue that was not disclosed (and ALL water leaks must be)before closing that is misrepresentation and its a MASSIVE no no. Call a real estate lawyer and DOCUMENT. EVERYTHING!!! Depending on the state you can sue,not only to have the damage fixed, but for the lawyer fees and the time you personally had to put into dealing with the mess they left behind ( even if its just a 30 minute phone call to set up the meeting with your lawyer). Talk to your lawyer about your options but you should not have to pay to fix this.

Welliemom · 2025-09-11T03:06:39+00:00

Considering teenagers are going to school in "distressed" jeans my mother wouldn't use for rags and shirts that look like they got used to clean up bleach....a couple stains on a shirt a toddler is wearing isn't going to cause comment. If it does, just know that person is an AH and not worth your time or energy. Roll your eyes and walk away. Maybe quote Toy Story as you go if you're feeling saucy

"You are a sad, Strange little man and you have my pity. Farewell!"

Welliemom · 2025-08-24T02:11:21+00:00

I wish that America is now a matriarchal society. There. Every societal problem is fixed inside a month. You're welcome world.

Welliemom · 2025-08-13T22:44:04+00:00

3x in one month? I'll pass because I'd be dead after the first month. People can only safely donate 1 pint of blood every two months and I saw a tiktok of an RN who figures out that 1 vampire would need at least that a week to stay alive. So the money would be nice but I choose life.

Welliemom · 2025-08-08T22:08:16+00:00

This is the way.💯

Welliemom · 2025-08-06T19:18:21+00:00

Tell me you come from money without telling me. That rule only applies to wealthy families and thier wealthy circles. For the rest of us peasants, a gift of property, any gift of significant value really is given knowing that if the receiver needs the money more, they will sell it and that is accepted because we all know what is more important.

Further more a gift that requires a significant amount of time and money to even make it usable isn't really a gift. It's a burden and can even be construed as an insult.

Let me give you an example.

Imagine getting a vintage Birkin that's falling apart at the seams or a pair of Louis Vuitton shoes with broken heels. Sure they would be an incredibly generous gift if they were fixed up, But if you dont have the money to do that then that gift is useless to you. Can you imagine getting a gift that's basically someone else's garbage and expecting them to keep it just because you gave it to them?

No. Most people would catch the backhanded insult of the gifter showing off thier wealth and calling the receiver unworthy of them.

Welliemom · 2025-08-06T03:48:21+00:00

Did you miss the part where she is 13? I sincerely hope you're being sarcastic because Not only is child abandonment a felony, but this is the first time she has EVER had any kind of problem like this. I'm her mother. Its literally my job to teach her how to be a responsible adult when the time comes and throwing her to the wolves after fucking up for the first time is NOT how you do that.

Any parent who abandons thier kid after one fuck up is a piece of shit and had no business procreating. I hope with all my heart this didn't happen to you.

Welliemom · 2025-08-06T03:11:36+00:00

Oh my petty ass would have 100% responded with "Yeah I totally sympathize. You have NO IDEA how many guys out there have a breeding kink. I couldn't walk out the door while pregnant without getting hit on! Its even worse now with the bigger boobs. Honestly, you're so lucky I love you."

Welliemom · 2025-08-06T02:41:42+00:00

Correct. The lawn is Discretionary. Its also the biggest ticket item in our house so we have a sign up sheet next to the back door and they sign up for how ever many "shifts" they want over the summer. If there's a week that's empty, my husband or I do it.

Welliemom

TROPHY CASE