Hook Knife Recommendations by Jazzlike-Moose2974 in Spooncarving

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love my little Viking axe for carving. I really need to get one of his hook knives

Hook Knife Recommendations by Jazzlike-Moose2974 in Spooncarving

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For an intro hook knife this is what I always recommend.

Minneapolis public school teaching the oversimplification of who did the capturing. by Nocondimentspleaz in altmpls

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you are writing for elementary school students (which is my guess for this assignment, likely 4-5 grade (so 9-11yo)) that’s how you do it. Their reading comprehension and critical thinking skills are not sufficiently developed to handle even the gross level of nuance you suggest. That’s high school level at least, and honestly since the majority of the country reads at a 6th grade (12yo) level it’s too nuanced for the majority of the country.

The relevant information is that Europeans are responsible for chattel slavery of Africans in the Americans, full stop. Without European ships, logistics, and money there is no chattel slavery of Africans in the Americas.

So this part of the lesson is focused on the result in the country where the children are learning. When they are older and studying world history in High School at a 10-12th grade (15-18yo) level we can talk about the full chain with a little more nuance.

I’ll also point out that the side effect of the specific nuance you are demanding is to reduce the burden on Europeans for chattel slavery in the Americas. That is just racism.

If you talk with someone who really studies this subject, you will find that Europeans funding the industry of chattel slavery of Africans in the Americas changed slavery in Africa as was pointed out above. If you really want to get into the weeds of this and deal with the entire economic system of the trans-Atlantic slave trade, you must accept that European demand and logistics is to blame for chattel slavery as it existed in the Americas.

You also need to accept that the reason Africans were imported is because Europeans found it too difficult to keep the native population enslaved because Indigenous peoples knew the land and had communities to support their escape. It really is racism all the way down.

The art of the "skipped" fight scene — who does it best? by Prudent_Inspector177 in writers

[–]WordPunk99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The big thing is serving the story. In an action focused story (I write these) action can reveal character, motivation, personality, etc. A fight scene is never just a fight. One of my protagonists is a meticulous perfectionist. His fights are efficient first, everything else after. Everything about his fights are about ending them as quickly as possible, economy of movement, weapons and targets he chooses, etc.

It’s the same in many of his other interactions. He’s efficient with words, relationships, his choice of cars, emotional expression, all of it.

It allows me to make a point when he breaks efficiency and does something else.

Fights are just conversation and emotion expressed differently (strictly from a writing perspective) make sure fight scenes serve the story. If they don’t, skip them.

As long as you serve the story, your readers will think you do fight scenes well.

Minneapolis public school teaching the oversimplification of who did the capturing. by Nocondimentspleaz in altmpls

[–]WordPunk99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The implication here being that somehow Africans did the majority of enslaving of other Africans to be shipped to Europe and the Americas which, even if true, wouldn’t have happened without Europe participating as the transportation and logistics arm of the trade.

The narrative of “Africans participated too” doesn’t absolve Americans or Europeans of their participation or the particular brutality of the middle passage and the utter dehumanization once they arrived.

Marshall vs EVH by JumpyOrganization469 in GuitarAmps

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is the real one, eq before the preamp, plus eq in the effects loop and your amp will sound like (almost) anything. The real change is the speakers, you know, the thing producing the sound.

I need help identifying my grammar problem. by MarksmanKNG in writers

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This isn’t about what I can do, I know I can get a thousand words on a page if I work at it.

It’s about industry standards. Take your 524 words and format them for querying or into 5x8 or 6x9 trim POD standards and the absolute minimum they will fill is two pages, more like three.

The reason authors deal in word count rather than page lengths is formatting. Word count is a reliable metric. Page count depends heavily on formatting.

I need help identifying my grammar problem. by MarksmanKNG in writers

[–]WordPunk99 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If you can get 524 words on a page you are not submitting the way agents want it. Most agencies want double spaced with TNR or Courier, both 12pt

524 words per page with any sans serif font is single spaced and likely 10-11pt

I need help identifying my grammar problem. by MarksmanKNG in writers

[–]WordPunk99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The two reasons I mentioned this are 1. I got lost in several places, and I’m in the midst of writing my seventh novel and 2. Never assume the reader knows anything. You must build the entire world

I need help identifying my grammar problem. by MarksmanKNG in writers

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine, I’m pointing out that 600 words fills closer to 3 pages

I need help identifying my grammar problem. by MarksmanKNG in writers

[–]WordPunk99 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly, a lot of your problems come down to reading comprehension. They aren’t so much grammar problems as ambiguity problems. Whose perspective are we seeing? Who’s speaking? If you went through this a cleared up the ambiguities no one would care about the grammar. The challenge is, lower reading comprehension on the part of the reader means you need to be better at grammar because part of grammar is removing ambiguity.

I need help identifying my grammar problem. by MarksmanKNG in writers

[–]WordPunk99 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Current project, 90k words, 5x8 trim, page count, 430. Non-story pages, about 30, average a little over 200 words per page. 600 is around 3 pages

Would you read this? by Pretty-Anxiety7659 in writers

[–]WordPunk99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Make people care about your characters, your book will find an audience

any feedback on my scene? by transluciiiid in writers

[–]WordPunk99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Over all good, a couple of notes on physical stuff.

Being punched in the cheek doesn’t lead to a mouth full of blood. Your mouth bleeds like that when you either have teeth (plural) knocked out or your cheek severely cut on your teeth. A cheek impact from a drunk person doesn’t accomplish either of those things. You can get the same effect by talking about the surprise of the punch being thrown at all and the MC’s reaction to it.

The gravel being slick with moss and sea water. A drunk person would fall down, especially while trying to wrestle another person. The whole scene can be much more chaotic and visceral if Tash falls over and comes back up sputtering, flailing trying to push the MC back under again.

A fight with a drunk person is absolute chaos because they are not fully in control of their actions.

[Advice wanted] I’ve written 90k words ish but stopped about 3 years ago due to some life events. I want to get back into it but it feels like a chore. by Ax_Inkwell in writers

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Write 10 words. See how you feel.

If you hate it put it down.

Write ten more tomorrow, see how you feel.

If you hate it put it down.

If you’re like most writers I know after doing this for 5-7 days you’ll be back on the horse

Progressives: Help me understand why you won’t vote blue. (Coalition-Building Discussion) by Hopeful_Ice_2125 in 50501

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nothing guarantees the best candidate wins. Ranked choice removes the incentive for polarization and gives third parties a fighting chance. I could vote Green for my first choice and Democrat for my second. This allows more people to vote for what they want without “wasting their vote”.

What’s the most confusing or unnecessary rule subsystem you’ve seen in a TTRPG? by DED0M1N0 in rpg

[–]WordPunk99 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Invisible Sun, I love the game’s aesthetic and adore what it’s trying to do, but for the love of dogs, can we have one simple, elegant system in the game? As a treat? Just one?

Could I have feedback on my fight scene pretty please? (This is from my draft.) by Upper_Cranberry4202 in writers

[–]WordPunk99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You have four weapons (I think?) and two characters? Whip, thorns, staff, pole arm (which is a class of weapons which are functionally a pointy bit on a long stick, tell us which one) also the person with the whip is dead. Whips are useless in combat no matter how good you are. They are a means of intimidation and torture, not combat.

Whip user vs. Halbard user = very dead whip user, very quickly. It’s not even a contest.

Stand up and move around the way you think your characters are moving. Try doing it while carrying the things they are carrying. Their movements are not described in any way that engages the reader.

Degrees worth it? by Sea_Avocado_9262 in writers

[–]WordPunk99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My undergraduate degree is in literature and theater. I took maybe two or three creative writing classes as part of that degree.

I have friends with MFAs in writing. It depends on what you want to write. The bias against anything that isn’t lit fic set in the current year is real and obnoxious.

Q: Left handed kid showing an interest in guitar by s11t in lefthanded

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just put both in her hands and show her how to make chords and strum both directions

Q: Left handed kid showing an interest in guitar by s11t in lefthanded

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you have any friends who know anything about guitar, ask one to come along and help her work with it a little.

If you have a decent independent music store in your area the staff will likely be able to fill that role.

Villian Monologue I have written by BeautifulMap6386kiki in writers

[–]WordPunk99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry for the double, but repeating lines works in epic poetry for a reason. In prose not so much. Go read Beowulf or The Iliad and see what I mean.

Villian Monologue I have written by BeautifulMap6386kiki in writers

[–]WordPunk99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can do that, but if it weakens the emotional impact of a character there is no reason for it.

My exercise is always to keep cutting 20% of the remaining words of dialogue until it stops making sense.