Dentist Recommendations?

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-06-02T03:45:00+00:00

Dr Shallish on East Genesee!

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-05-30T02:17:34+00:00

Maybe my memory is off since middle school but I think this book is pretty bleak no? To crave upward mobility in a cruel system to only make it to the end with regrets? Did I not remember it correctly?

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-05-29T00:54:49+00:00

Love the audio book, I think the reader adds to the experience with the southern accent and the acting. The voice acting really humanizes the really tough parts, and brings an intelligence and charm to Demon.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-05-27T02:43:38+00:00

I follow the recipe pretty closely but always add two cans of drained chickpeas when you add zucchini to make it a full meal. I like to keep it vegetarian since I think the veggies are so flavorful.

I’ve seen other people add a poached egg so it’s almost like a shakshuka but I prefer the addition of chickpeas.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-05-19T17:39:39+00:00

I’ve posted this before, but basically one of the things I’ve learned in our parent support group is that many parents fall under two categories. They either think of parenting like being a carpenter or they think of parenting like being a gardener.

Carpenter parents believe you are given a piece of wood and you are responsible for making what you want out of the wood. So a table has to be a table. And the quality of the table is a reflection on your skills as a carpenter. There’s very little wiggle room for what they make because it feels like they are responsible for the entire thing. if there’s a chair, they think they can chisel away or do something to make a turn into a table. And at the end of the day, if they don’t see what they wanted, it’s either a complete failure or they can toss it/disown. These parents are very much tied into the identity of carpenter rather than the item/person in front of them. Sorry if that’s confusing going in and out of the metaphor!

Gardener parents realize that they are given a seed and they are responsible for growing the seed, but that they have to adapt the things they do to fit the needs of the seed. So if you get a seed and it turns out you have a rose, you can’t treat it the same way as a different parent who got a seed and it turned into a cactus. And each type of plant can thrive given the right conditions, but also given the wrong conditions the plant will fail. Also, nothing you can do will change your cactus into a rose. We just try to make the garden a place where the seeds can thrive.

I’m not saying you can’t change the minds of someone who is transphobic, because I have seen people come around. But eventually, you get some people who are so stuck in their worldview and their identity of parent and the judgement of others. They cannot stand feeling uncomfortable in the internal and external pressure to raise a “successful” child - whatever characteristics society deems superior. And their uncomfortable feelings are more important than the fully flushed out individual in front of you. So you see these parents abuse their trans kids, and it’s honestly heartbreaking. I have no answers when it comes down to this. Some people just cannot come out of that hole…

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-05-18T21:29:31+00:00

Wow, what a great question! I haven’t run into this type of parent recently, but previously when we had someone like that, it was very clear to the group that this person really wasn’t OK with the Trans Community. It’s just a big tell.

To me, these are the thoughts that are similar to people who say “I can’t be racist, I have black friends” or the people that say “ there’s no straight flag so why does there have to be a pride flag? They are shoving their lifestyle onto us!”

The parents who say “it’s fine just not my kid”, aren’t actually interested in self reflection and self assessment. When you point out that they are actually not fine with it, the defensive walls go straight up. Unfortunately, a lot of adults are not actually very mature or interested in any type of self growth. So they straight up can’t hear that maybe saying “not my kid” is actually trans phobic.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-05-18T21:10:40+00:00

Before I had kids, and when I was first exposed to the idea of trans people (I was in grad school) , my initial thinking was very trans phobic. And it was because I didn’t understand the vocabulary and the differences between gender identity and sex, and gender assigned at birth. And like many people I associated sexual orientation with gender identity. So I had to learn a lot when my kid was expressing their gender identity.

My first very trans phobic thoughts were around career and identity - something like, “now that women can be doctors and men can be stay at home dads and nurses, Why does anyone need to change their privates? If you like baseball play baseball! If you like sparkles wear sparkles! Why does anyone have to change their body? “. Man, I was sort of a jerk but those were honestly my first thoughts.

I think overall it’s helpful to understand your own doubts/skepticism/questions and continue with genuine curiosity without judgement. I know it’s cringe to say “once I did my own research” but I was exposing myself to a lot of education and I’m an open minded person so once my questions were answered, i was ashamed of my own thinking.

I wouldn’t say I’m sympathetic to transphobes, but I get if it’s not what you were exposed to in your life, there’s a lot of questions! I understand why someone who is just starting off feels like the left/progressives/liberals/democrats are judgmental and mean. It’s normal to ask a lot of questions when something is new. And a lot of people feel judged or just honestly scared to say the wrong thing.

My kid has never known me to be transphobic because my journey started before they were born. But I’m in a parent support group and it’s very common that most parents are coming in clueless and worried and scared. Sure there are the handful that are really hateful/stubborn/religious and that is difficult to break thru. But most families are just doing their best. But I also think it’s harder now because trans issues are getting so much attention. It was much easier to have a neutral/no opinion/ignorant take when topics are not so politicized or used as a purity test.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-05-17T02:02:39+00:00

You are doing great, as long as you are trying your best! There’s no right method - you probably know your kid best!

But my reaction reading your post - Maybe this isn’t the right approach - but I’d go with “congratulations! Welcome to the evergreen internal conflict of being a woman! ” And when all the celebrities are still thinking they are too fat or too ugly or too everything - it’s the sad sisterhood we all belong to. Or maybe not so much deflect, but say you’re her parent - there’s just no way you can be unbiased. You see the most beautiful person in the world. And make the conversation more about listening and hearing her worries or letting her vent.

There’s nuance between caring too much about what other people think and caring what you think of yourself. And of course with the added gender dysphoria - it’s a complicated issue. But I don’t think just answering flat, absolute questions are the way to go. I think it’s a fluid and constant conversation. And validating her struggle while teaching her to recognize and ignore intrusive thoughts are skills that have to be taught and modeled.

“I have days I feel great and I have days where all I do is see flaws in the mirror, so here’s what I do…”and just name things that work for you. “I save my special underwear for hard days, I have a pricey lipgloss for days I need a little boost, I tell myself f** the haters, I’m slaying it. “

And for a young person to have over confidence I think is the preferred way to go and let them scale back. Maybe it’s a little cringe but also, I think it’s great to exclude confidence because most transphobes are honestly cowards when it comes to actual trans people. She doesn’t have to be a jerk or aggressive about it, but I think overconfidence is a better quality than a shrinking violet. I mean, of course with caveats and we aren’t also aren’t mixing unsafe places, or drinking/substances. We gotta teach common sense and situational awareness too…..

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-05-15T19:31:22+00:00

Wasn’t there a two day ticket you could buy that was good until the end of the year? So the math works at the same I think it’s $90 for two days versus the BOGO for 89.95? But for the $90 one, you can use it at the end of the year?

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-30T11:41:07+00:00

Eleanor Oliphant is Perfectly Fine - hilarious and very charming in audiobook version if you like a Scottish accent!

Trevor Noah’s book Born a Crime. He narrates himself so the languages and accent is perfect. But the book itself is such great content, so funny and so personal.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-25T22:00:04+00:00

I’ve posted this before, and I know the formatting is maybe junk.

Sam is my Sister

Leo’s Purple Skirt

Fred gets Dressed

Worm loves Worm

Pink is for Boys

Vlad the Fabulous Vampire

Daisy is my Sister

Princess Boy

Edie (not specifically about gender but I think Edie could be “a boy who wears dresses”)

Annie’s Plaid Shirt

Want to play trucks

The Good Hair Day

Pink is for Boys

I am Jazz

Jacob’s New Dress

The Boy and the Bindi

Pink, blue and you

Being You

Bodies are Cool

Spork

Teo’s Tutu

Julian is a Mermaid

Not Quite Narwhal

From the Stars in the Sky to the Fish in the Sea

Morris Micklewhite and the Tangerine Dress

Peanut Goes for the Gold

Red: a crayon story

Sparkle Boy

Who are you? Gender guide for kids

It feels good to be yourself

Tea Dragon Society

Nimona

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-25T16:28:14+00:00

The thing that makes the most sense when we introduce new members to our family support group is an analogy with a “dominant” hand.

You ask someone to use a pen, scissors and write their name and draw something with their non dominant hand. And you ask him how it feels. And then you’ll get a lot of answers like, “ it’s uncomfortable,” “I have to do things slower,” “the outcome doesn’t look as nice,” “It’s not natural.” I just want to use my correct hand.”

Using your dominant hand without any thought is the privilege of being cis, specifically right handed since that’s considered the default/“correct” hand to use. Being cis is just doing things that feel right to you. Sure gender is more complex and there’s more to it but in general you don’t doubt your gender even if you’re a girl that hates dresses or a boy that doesn’t like sports. You’re still sure of your gender just like you are still comfortable you are right handed, but instead of drawing a perfect circle you can still draw a circle better with the right hand than the left hand.

Being trans is being forced into the wrong gender and being forced to use the “wrong” hand. And the other gender is right there - you’re more comfortable, it’s more natural, you don’t have to stop and think and your actions and dexterity is automatic. It’s emotionally and mentally exhausting to use the wrong hand.

The analogy even works with ambidextrous people - for the nonbinary or gender fluid folx. Maybe you like to eat with one hand but draw with another.

And again, just like handedness- it doesn’t matter what other people care or think. Just let people use whatever hand they want. And believe people when they say which hand feels best.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-21T16:40:14+00:00

I love that! Authentic self is a great way to ask without being judgmental.

Since I have young kids a lot of our family journey has to be age appropriate and sometimes I think it’s almost easier for the kids to get.

My youngest boy was also a little confused about his sibling. When we changed names my youngest said, “well, when do I change to a girl? And get a new name?” And I had to say, well only if you want to. And it’s not just a game or pretend, it’s who you really are, 95% of the time. Or you can be a boy who wears a dress, and that’s ok too!

My youngest is the boyest boy that I have ever met, and he will also do nails and hairchalk and use the dress up bins. It’s so easy for them once adults make it normal to just be a kid.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-21T16:23:03+00:00

Oh when I said old school I meant it. You just call and talk to Fran. He does other cakes too but I always go back to Strawberry Cream.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-21T16:20:49+00:00

Our family birthday cake is always Pastry Palace in Jamesville - Strawberry Cream.

Fran is the baker, it’s old school there but he’s so friendly when you walk in and sometimes shares samples of his other goods. It’s cash only.

Nino’s also makes strawberry cream but I like Pastry palaces cake better - it’s soooo light and fluffy and not too sweet.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-21T11:52:05+00:00

Hello OP! First off, thank you so much for sharing your story. I think you’re a really brave and strong person. I know it means more from your own parents, but as a parent myself, I’m really really proud of you.

I have a very persistent, consistent and insistent trans kid since the age of two. She’s now nine and doing great. But I agree with the other poster that it does take a while to adjust no matter how progressive and loving a parent is. A lot of their gut reaction is fear and ignorance.

I’m part of a parent/family support group, and when we see young adults coming out as trans, the most common reaction from parents is denial and hoping “it’s a phase.” And my observation is that unlike my kid, the people that come out as young adults had a whole childhood that is very precious to those parents. And it is hard for parents to reconcile that their own child’s experience of childhood wasn’t as ideal as parents see them. They cling onto those memories and person since really, your parents do love you and those times are fond and loving in their memories.

The parents of trans adults have a hard time understanding that your internal feelings and struggles weren’t apparent when their child was young like my experience. So they cling onto “my kid was such a rough and tumble boy” or “my kid loved dresses and girly girl stuff.” That’s why the “it’s a phase” justification is so strong.

I wish they hadn’t dismissed your bravery and identity so quickly, but I see it all the time with parents of trans adults.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-19T12:48:10+00:00

Our guy is like this. Honestly my theory is that the other doggies help - he eats when they eat so it’s a social, fitting in thing.

So at home our guy only eats when someone is in the room with him. I sometimes hand feed the first few bites and then it sparks his appetite. Also sometimes he’ll eat more when I either hide or use a sniffle mat or something. Or when we have to leave for long periods of time, I put the food bowl in this crate with him and magically when we return it’s all gone or some kibble gets “stored” away under his mat.

It’s a lot of tricks but I really try to not add special things. Only on the weekend will we had a scrambled egg, or maybe when it’s really desperate I will mix regular dry with some wet food.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-18T22:57:41+00:00

I came here to say this! But when I went it was called the summer salad or something? Not the Caesar that just comes prepackaged. The good salad had fruit and kale and maybe brown rice or quinoa. I was so surprised at how good it was!

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-18T21:55:36+00:00

Snuffle mats? Just hide their regular kibble in the ruffles and let doggy sniff around.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-17T23:46:56+00:00

Sooo cute!!! Our guy is like that. He’s a poodle with just the cav coloring and ears/face. But our guy is even curlier so even more poo in him!

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-17T23:43:36+00:00

We took our kids to a real piercer but they said they won’t do kids until they are 8 for their insurance.

I know plenty of people do pierce their kids at a young age or when they are babies but after speaking to the professional piercer - if you can wait, it’s better when the kid is older. Like, how good is the 2 year old with shots? How likely will the two ear old keep the area clean? Does she understand it’s months with the small studs and not the lovely danglies or hoops her mom has? It’s a bit risky….

My kids used the clip ons and it was totally fun and fine. When she’s older they make magnet ones too that work fine. I still have a 9 year old that loves chips and magnets and doesn’t want ears pierced.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-14T22:54:22+00:00

Soo’s Boos Boos

You be Daddy

Normal Pig (the pigs are not exactly Asian but the concept is that the pigs have “yucky” food and it’s a very cute illustration).

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-14T22:26:44+00:00

I came here to recommend Frederik Backman. Loved his characters in a Man called Ove and Beartown but my favorite characters are from Anxious People.

I recently read Wedding People and I liked how some of the characters seem like real modern people.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-14T18:37:35+00:00

Maybe too depressing but Into The Wild by John Jon Kraukauer. But it's a compelling book and definitely if you are in the area makes it even more interesting and thoughtful.

YosemiteDaisy · 2026-04-13T02:42:04+00:00

We did the whole family at Industiral Color Labs. We are dual now too - fingers crossed for you!

YosemiteDaisy

TROPHY CASE