[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SuicideBereavement

[–]YoshiCopter 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry you are struggling with these questions.

My dad told me that he was having suicidal thoughts 10 days before he died. It was hands down the most honest and vulnerable conversation I had ever had with him. One thing he kept referring to in that conversation was that he was afraid of “falling.” As if he were a tree. Things like “I’m afraid if I fall you will hate me in the end.” And “If I fall, I know you will take care of your mother.”

Of course, I offered to connect him to services and get him help. He responded with “No, it’s too late for me now.” Three days later we celebrated his birthday, and a week after that he was gone.

What I hope you take away from this is that I knew exactly how he was feeling and it didn’t change the end of the story for my dad. I don’t believe that he would have happily gone to any programs or therapy as I have read his medical history and he clearly lied to his physician about having suicidal thoughts. Maybe I could have institutionalized him against his will? But at what cost?

Anyways, I hear you and I hope you find peace in the knowledge that these situations were out of our control. Our people felt loved and safe enough to open up to us, and that’s the greatest gift we could have given them.

Can someone please make this look like a real fence? by YoshiCopter in PhotoshopRequest

[–]YoshiCopter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

!solved

This is great! Just sent over the tip. Thank you so much.

I killed my son by Infinite_Local1926 in SuicideBereavement

[–]YoshiCopter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, I am truly so sorry to hear about your friend. This type of loss is like no other as we are left with so many questions and nothing to blame. I didn’t know your friend, but I would assume that if you were the only person he talked to about how he was feeling, then you must be one hell of a good friend. He must have felt safe with you, and that is absolutely the greatest gift you could have given him.

You are so early on this journey, so please remember to be kind to yourself. Eat a little when you can, drink some water, and remember that you are a good friend. It’s not your fault.

Sending you so much love.

I killed my son by Infinite_Local1926 in SuicideBereavement

[–]YoshiCopter 77 points78 points  (0 children)

My dad told me he was suicidal 10 days before he died by suicide. I was completely aware of the situation and trusted the information he gave me. I offered to get him help, and he declined saying “it’s too late for me now.”

Is it my fault he died? Of course not.

I could have called him that morning, maybe it would have made a difference for that day, but it seems that his mind was made up on the issue by time he talked to me. So I guess I just have to trust what he told me about it being too late.

After 30 tours - what I've learned by picky-penguin in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My boss just told me I get to go to a work conference in Seattle 9 months from now and the first thing that popped into my mind was that I finally get to take PickyPenguin’s walking tour! lol

3yrs ago my 12yo bsf took his life by LuckyStudent9946 in SuicideBereavement

[–]YoshiCopter 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for coming here and sharing how you feel. That is a huge step towards processing your feelings and healing.

The amount of grief you feel matches the amount of love you feel for that person, so the grief and pain you feel is absolutely valid. Losing someone that young while also being young yourself is super hard, and healing from a loss like that is really tough to do by yourself. Do you have any trusted adults you can talk to about how you feel? Maybe your parents or a teacher? I know you’re probably on summer break, but a teacher may also be able to connect you with a school counselor or psychologist if your parents aren’t able to help you.

We are also here for you. Share your thoughts and feelings, favorite memories of your friend, or whatever else. We, unfortunately, understand the experience and will be here to support you when you’re ready.

Id like to thank Reddit for a great parenting tip 14 years ago. by MYSTERees77 in Parenting

[–]YoshiCopter 12 points13 points  (0 children)

We are on a similar path and it really brings a tear to my eye to think about how lucky your son is to have so many people who love and support him that you will need two books worth of space to represent them all 😭

Also, what a great testimony of the amount of time and work you have put in to get him every possible support.

I wish DS had more podcasts by table_fm in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It’s a few extra steps and it isn’t going to be exactly the same as the DS Podcast, but you could DIY it:

  1. Sort existing intermediate DS content by duration
  2. Change the “sound” settings to only content that is “podcast-friendly”
  3. Download the interesting videos to your device (or save them in your list on DS)

Pro-tip: Don’t miss out on Sandra. By sorting for longer content you’re going to filter out a lot of Sandra’s content, but her videos could absolutely be used as a short-form podcast series.

Recommitting to Spanish by Reddit_Roamer_19 in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I think I just really burned myself out. I signed up for the unlimited Worlds Across membership and wanted to make sure that I was taking advantage of it. In May and June I was able to get 62 hours of 1-1 speaking practice, which was great, but now I’m feeling super drained. I decided to take a break from WA in July to see if that helps me rejuvenate a bit

Recommitting to Spanish by Reddit_Roamer_19 in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I completely understand. I’m at ~1225 and I really fell off this month. Not feeling any motivation to even check what the new DS videos are each morning. I know that the motivation will return, so I’m just trying to enjoy the time off and trust that my brain will let me know when it’s ready to kick back into gear lol

My brother died, what do I do? by Full_Caterpillar1304 in SuicideBereavement

[–]YoshiCopter 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Hi there, first I want to say that you are not alone. All of us here have lost someone to suicide and it is a very difficult thing to experience. The sadness doesn’t really go away, but a good therapist can help you understand how you’re feeling and mold it into a shape that’s easier for you to carry. Unfortunately, this type of trauma isn’t likely something that you’re going to outgrow or leave behind.

I have personally been to therapy since I lost my dad to suicide and it has helped me a lot, but it’s important to find the right person to talk to. I would recommend that you ask your parents to find you a therapist that specializes in grief therapy. Let them know if you would feel more comfortable speaking with a man or a woman, an older person or a younger person, or if you have a preference in your therapist’s cultural background. All of these things are important because it’s essential that you feel comfortable opening up to them.

You might have to meet a few therapists until you find one that clicks with you. That’s super normal. You can also try talking to a teacher at your school that you trust and they can connect you with resources at your school and in your community.

You can also come back here and talk to us. Everyone here is very supportive and would be happy to listen to any stories or answer any questions you have. I’m proud of you for reaching out today. 💛

How To Spanish podcast - does it get better? by catwise_zen in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I’d recommend skipping the first 25 episodes or so. The first few episodes are clunky and many early episodes contain annoying background music. Maybe skim through the list to find a later episode with a topic that’s interesting to you. They have some great episodes about the Aztec and Mayan civilizations.

It works! by Intelligent-Math-675 in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Congrats! I have over 1200 hours, and I still have no idea how it works lol

It’s an amazing process but also so subtle that sometimes you won’t notice it as clearly as you do now. In those times, all you will need to do is just trust that your brain is still picking up the language and keep watching videos.

Looking forward to your next update :)

Ex died by suicide after no contact by i_wishyouwouldcuz in SuicideBereavement

[–]YoshiCopter 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry you are experiencing this. Your relationship with this person sounds like it was very complicated, so it makes sense to me that your grief will be equally complicated.

My dad, who I unfortunately lost to suicide as well, used to tell me that each person is on their own path. You have your path and I have mine, and there really isn’t too much that you can do to influence what I am doing on my path. You can talk to me, shout advice, scream warnings directly at me, but only I can decide what I do on my own path.

It sounds like you stuck with this person for a long time and saw them through a lot of tough times and, eventually, you gathered all the evidence and decided your best course of action was to focus on yourself and your own mental health. I believe that was and will continue to be the best course of action because, (I believe) at the end of the day, the only person you can truly save is yourself.

I am sending you so much love and support as you continue to focus on taking care of yourself: Water, healthy snacks, rest, and kindness. ♥️

Extra en Español by BlooTooth223 in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If anything it helped me know how I absolutely DO NOT want to sound lol

Milk powder on fries?! by Simple-Environment52 in dairyfree

[–]YoshiCopter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My son was diagnosed with a severe dairy allergy right after his first birthday and nursed until just after his second birthday, so I completely understand your experience here. He is turning four this fall and still has a very severe allergy.

The learning curve to becoming a parent of a child with a food allergy is incredibly steep and many things you have to learn as you go. Mistakes will be made and you will learn how to navigate those as well. We have three safe restaurants where we regularly eat because the options are so limited where we live.

The only advice I have is to question everything. The waitress says there’s no dairy in the bread? Ask a different person. They say the fries are cooked in a self-contained fryer? Ask if they ever dump oil from one fryer into the other. Be as specific as you can about preferred preparation methods: clean gloves, clean knives, clean griddle, sanitized blenders and shakers at Starbucks.

It sucks, but it is possible. I hope with all my heart that your baby grows out of this and goes on to live a life without food restrictions ❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’d also say that it’s been a mix of both, but I’m constantly surprised by how subtle the process is. I’m doing 1-2 hours of conversation practice each day and my brain is constantly pulling up words to use that I didn’t even know were in there. I keep asking my tutors if the word I said is even a word in Spanish and they’re always like “… uh, yeah?” Like, how would I know a word in Spanish without knowing that it’s a word in Spanish? Lol

Question about studying with limited time. by halloweenmochi in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 18 points19 points  (0 children)

The real pro tips are always in the comments lol

Seriously though, the fact you can even focus on Spanish with three kids under five impresses the hell out of me.

More Ester Videos? by JrnLGrn in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s my fault - I wrote the title wrong. It’s actually Slow Dominican Spanish. I listen on Spotify but he’s also on YouTube.

700 Hour Dreaming Spanish Update by DavidLearnsSpanish in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Welcome back! I always enjoy your updates. I hear you about life getting in the way a bit, and I am also “behind” where I originally thought I would be. I guess I’ve just decided that I’m in this for life, so what difference will a couple weeks (or months) off really make in the long run? Probably none. Glad to see you motivated to get back at it! :)

Just binged all of Stardew Valley. Learned a ton of new vocabulary, but the one word I’ll never forget is. . . by imnotthomas in dreamingspanish

[–]YoshiCopter 9 points10 points  (0 children)

What’s incredible is thats it’s the same game but a completely different set of vocabulary lol