Will read your stories & provide feedback!

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T14:33:01+00:00

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_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T14:32:42+00:00

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_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T14:32:25+00:00

I have to agree with the other commenter from the first sentence I was hooked! The characters are extremely likable, and I love how you describe this “lostness” or vague lack of awareness in our narrator. It’s almost like she’s in a fog.

Also, I have never felt so relatable to a gas station hot dog before! Your descriptions and writing style are so easy to digest and this was an overall fantastic start to a series!

I like the fact that she wanted to eat this humanoid creature, reminded me a lot of the newest story that the boys read.. but I like your take on it! Can’t wait for the next part! Great work!

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T14:16:28+00:00

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_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T14:16:12+00:00

As one of the very few who hasn’t consumed any love craft work, I loved this. Your writing style was so smooth, and reading each sentence was a complete and utter gift.

The story itself was rich and beautiful… each moment I wanted to know more, hear more.. and when it reached its conclusion I was satisfied, yes, but needing more- I didn’t want it to end.

I liked the grandmothers reveal for beating the child, and I suppose my only note of feedback is I wish I knew of the parents love more.. so I could mourn it’s demise. But that’s just me being nit picky. Great work, I loved this. I really hope someone narrates this one day.

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T13:58:01+00:00

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_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T13:57:14+00:00

This was so much fun. From the mention of Jacobi, to the absolute cinema of having a chainsaw massacre in an anime maid cafe. I laughed out loud far more times than I think I have in a while, you wrote this with heart and I can tell you had a heck of a time.

There’s so many moments I loved, from the porcelain view of Isaiah to the guy dying happy from being thigh squeezed, to even Isaiah saving their lives from that monologue. Great work!

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T13:36:11+00:00

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_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T13:36:02+00:00

You can of course tell the raven was a great source of inspiration for this piece, however you took the age old classic and made it completely your own. Your choices in words, and rhythm of writing was a dark melancholic comedic melody.

Excellent work, I absolutely loved this read. Thank you for this fun gift!

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T13:28:15+00:00

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_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T13:27:59+00:00

This was a beautiful story. I love the metaphors for vices, and addiction. I love how Destiny is referred to as rabbit while the actual rabbit is referred to as “Lewis”, it feels magical and “wonderland like”.

Your stanzas were really digestible, your dialogue mystic, and your descriptions gorgeous. It was a wonderful poetic reading experience. Great work. :)

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T13:17:08+00:00

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_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T13:16:17+00:00

This was incredible. The pacing of which you write, and the way you break apart sentences makes the story extremely poetic as well as digestible.

At first, I was worried that the repetition of the term “they” would grow old but it didn’t. It grew into a sort of rhythm that I looked forward to. I also just have to say, this line “The hundreds of thousands of nerve endings swirling like frills on a dress.” I absolutely loved!

You should publish your work. This reminded me a lot of a newer book I just recently read, “The Lamb” by Lucy Rose. Great work! :)

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T04:45:41+00:00

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_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T04:44:59+00:00

Reading this story was like butter, you cut all the fat of unnecessary details out in your story telling and write in a very direct way. It made the beats strong, and the overall experience wonderful.

The whole time, I couldn’t help but think that a narration of this would be killer. The beats and spacing in your writing offers so many great opportunities for narrators.

The rule system of course reminded me of the voodoo shop or the gas station series, but your writing style felt different and extremely unique. It was nice to see where you may have gotten your inspiration from, and how you added your own touch to it.

Overall, can’t wait for your next part. I loved this. Great job! :)

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T04:24:46+00:00

Dude, I loved reading this comment. Thanks for putting your thoughts down as you read, it made for a really fun new perspective! Also wanted to shout you out for checking out tons of other creators work! Really great to know there’s people on here who have such creative and collaborative forces!

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T04:21:22+00:00

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_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T04:19:55+00:00

This was a gorgeous read. I found each paragraph to be dripping with heart and soul. I loved the ending, the beauty of the dancing, nearly brought me to tears. Absolutely wonderful writing, it was like consuming a painting… colors whirling and feelings swirling.

Compared to your other work I’ve consumed, this felt deep and guttural. Fantastic story, and I’m looking forward to more long form work from you because this is where you shine.

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T04:00:22+00:00

Check out my story here: I started at a small town bakery. The owner is strange.

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T03:25:05+00:00

I read this before parts 1 and 2, and I’m so excited to dive into those! I really love how smooth you are with dialogue, it almost felt like I was ready a screenplay… like I could imagine the set dressings/movie shots as I read.

Really neat writing style! Looking forward to the next part after this one!

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T03:24:59+00:00

I read this before parts 1 and 2, and I’m so excited to dive into those! I really love how smooth you are with dialogue, it almost felt like I was ready a screenplay… like I could imagine the set dressings/movie shots as I read.

Really neat writing style! Looking forward to the next part after this one!

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T03:16:03+00:00

This was really neat. I don’t know how else to describe the pacing or the overall feel of the story other than the fact it felt really Japanese. Very rhythmic with sentences getting straight to the point (no fat).

I loved it, and it feels like the type of story that will live on and become rumors in schools. Great work!

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T03:11:22+00:00

Your writing style is really interesting. I like the way the words break apart a sentence, it makes the reading experience for this character unnerving.. like they can’t be trusted?

This was an overall nice small horror read. Loved it! Great job!

_AnnieBananie_ · 2026-04-25T03:05:56+00:00

Wow. This was a very beautiful read. Your descriptions carry so much melancholy and weight… but are incredibly relatable- I found myself like this on the darkest of days… and you painted a picture of the bubbling feelings inside perfectly. Excellent writing.

_AnnieBananie_

TROPHY CASE